Am I awful for wanting my body back?

[KittyKat2020]

I’m 36 weeks pregnant and excited to meet my little boy but the last few days I’ve been getting quite emotional because I’m in pain all the time and can’t sleep. I miss my active lifestyle and I’m so worried I’ll never get my body back. Don’t get me wrong I’m grateful to be pregnant, I’ve waited a while but this is tougher than anyone tells you!

Your not awful for wanting that at all. Not everyone loves being pregnant. I didn’t - I found it really hard.
You’ll get there x

No you’re not awful. Don’t rely on it though. My DS is 3 and I never got my body back, many women don’t.

Not at all
I hated pregnancy and birth.
Was delighted to get my body back.
I won't have a 2nd, one reason is I don't want to risk or give up my body

@Idontgiveagriffindamn thank you, I’m glad it’s not just me. Everyone goes on about the glow and how wonderful it is but honestly it’s brutal! His big and breech so it’s just painful 😖

@Raimona honestly I’d be pretty upset if I didn’t get some stuff back. I miss all the energy I had more than my figure though.

This is how I feel. I’ve always been very active and I hate not being in control of my body.

I absolutely hated being pregnant, and couldn’t wait until I had my body back! Not in terms of looks (I’ve no gym body) but just being responsible for my body only instead of me plus two.

It is tougher than anyone tells you, and I felt like a freak and so ashamed for not loving pregnancy because it seemed that every other woman did. With the benefit of hindsight I know that those fears were all in my head, and if I’d spoken up I’d have found others!

You’re on the final stretch, good luck!

Nah it’s normal. I was pretty surprised at how quickly things shifted back to some vague sense of normality. Your uterus I think shrinks down to its original size within a week or something.

If you’ve been active anyway and are keen to start again once the dr has given you the go ahead then it shouldn’t be impossible. Things might have changed slightly - wider ribcage for example but I don’t subscribe to this notion that once you’ve had a baby you’re automatically an out of shape blob forever more. Take it easy and make sure to enjoy those beautiful first weeks and months with the baby but it’s definitely possible.

I hated pregnancy, I was nauseous, in pain and without any energy throughout, what is to like about that? My DS is nearly 5, I put a lot of weight on in pregnancy due to my running going out the window due to pain and eating constantly as it kept the nausea at bay, I'd say by the time he was 2 my body was 90% back to what it was and I'm happy with it (expecting 100% is probably unrealistic) I have the same amount of energy I used to have, my hips are still a bit dicky but I run regularly and mostly no issues.

@Raimona way to kick a girl when she’s down. Uncalled for.

OP don’t worry, it might take a little time, but you can get your body back! I can fit into all my pre pregnancy clothes, could from about 5 months. And I was back in the gym 6 weeks after a c section. Although I will admit that the lack of sleep means I’m not always operating at max power...

I didn’t enjoy being pregnant either. Are you able to do much walking? I found most days at the end it made me feel a lot better to keep active but some days it was just too uncomfortable.

@Lilybet1980 thank you so much!! Hearing you were back at the gym 6 weeks after a c section is literally what I needed to hear! I’ve got to have c section due to him being big and breech and I’m so worried about the recovery. Every time I say I’m going to grit my teeth and get better quick someone says it can’t be done so thank you

My third is three months old and I honestly think having a newborn is so much easier than being pregnant for this exact reason! The pregnancy exhaustion is so tough, everything is hard!

It's definitely possible to get back to exercising again but take it steadily at least at first. I tried playing tennis about 6 weeks pp (had played up until about 30 weeks pregnant) and fell flat on my face because I wasn't used to how my weight and centre of gravity had changed! If you're likely to have a c section there's a great book called caesarian recovery by Chrissie Gallager Murphy which has lots of advice for pre and post birth movement and gradual return to exercise.

OP I would really recommend you listen to all the advice about resting for those 6 weeks and taking things easy, and gradually build up the amount you are walking. You don’t want to push it too hard and set your recovery back. There are no prizes for a 10k walk after 2 weeks and then being back in bed with pain after 3!

@UnaOfStormhold oh yes, my balance was all over the shop for quite a while!

There's lots on line about massaging your c-section wound, how to reduce diastasis recti, why not exercising before a certain time is beneficial, how much to lift to reduce the 'pooch' look etc. I would read up about that.
Another thing is who to contact during covid if you have questions/worries postnatal.

Every time I say I’m going to grit my teeth and get better quick someone says it can’t be done so thank you

Please don't put pressure on yourself to get 'better' to a certain timescale - it's not something you can control and you can do a lot of damage if you do too much too quickly. I had a vaginal birth but I developed a nasty infection in my stitches which the doctor said was because I was trying to walk far too far and be too 'normal' too soon after birth - not only was the infection painful, it also actually delayed me being able to do what I wanted to do for quite a while longer than if I'd been more patient in the first place. You will be able to be back in the gym, etc if you want to, but just don't put a time limit on it or feel like you've done something wrong if it takes longer than you'd like. It's also normal not to have much energy for quite a while after birth - most people don't get much sleep, you're recovering from a big physical event and you might not be pregnant anymore but if you're breastfeeding you're still sustaining another person - so, again, don't despair if it takes longer to feel 'normal' than you want, it doesn't mean it'll never happen.

I feel the same OP. I'm only 25 weeks and not too constricted yet but I miss my active lifestyle and cannot wait to no longer be pregnant!

It’s normal to feel like this! I remember getting so fed up with not being able to get comfortable in bed, struggling to get in and out of the car in narrow parking spaces, back aching all the time etc.

It took me until about six months postnatal to feel like my body was “normal” again but that was partly due to me breastfeeding so having to wear particular clothes, breast pads etc.

Totally understandable and legitimate way to feel.
I gained nearly 30 kg with my first pregnancy, was active throughout (weight training twice a week and lots of walking) and got back to my prepregnancy weight within five months. Without exercising (nothing besides walking) or dieting. It just sort of happened. I would recommend not obsessing about food, it can make a person eat more.
That said, I didn’t feel like fully I had my body back because I was still breastfeeding. That sense of autonomy didn’t return because my body always had to be thought of in the context of satisfying my baby’s needs. I loved breastfeeding! But everything from where you go, what you wear, and what you consume is heavily influenced by someone other than you.
Then I got pregnant right away again, when my baby was five months old. This was planned. And great as my husband and I are a bit older.
I’m nearly 36 weeks. I feel as though I haven’t been a regular human for two years. And I can’t believe I may have 6 more weeks. 6 weeks!
My baby feels so low already this time. I’ve got shooting pains, can’t sleep, I’m itchy all over (not obstetric cholestasis - they’ve checked) and I’m so tired. And all the stuff I scheduled last time to look forward to is off limits because of Covid. No massages, no lunches with friends (playing it safe lest we contact sniffles and husband can’t be there for birth), no manicures, no idle shopping. Also I’m running around after my incredibly mobile and adorable son - feeling guilty I’m not more physical with him. Boo hoo hoo.
Anyway, if you want your body back, you will get it back. Formula feeding (which we eventually switched to after my milk supply dropped in pregnancy) may be a good option if you need that sense of independence. Otherwise breastfeeding is lovely and also helps shift extra flub. Walking is great exercise, and can help calm baby or encourage sleep in a sling (great exercise) or pram. Have faith, it will happen.
Just as these 1-6 weeks will somehow pass for me...

Sorry - 20 kg, not 30!

35 weeks here and feel the same. It's been a hard pregnancy this time too..I've not been able to walk as much. I did a bit of cycling and tennis with my kids before 25 weeks.

What I will say is this is my third and I did get my body back to a size 10 after each.i cant bf so took longer but usually within the year. I'm desperate to get running, do the odd DVD and maybe if gyms are reasonably normal come November when I plan to start I will go..

Being pregnant is just a temporary state although it dies seem endless at times!
Seriously, dont worry! You are nearly through it.
Everyone is different but I was back in the gym excatly a week later. ( taking it easy!) and then swimming. With a good diet and plenty of walking with baby I was back to normal in weeks.
I honestly never thought that would happen but it does.
Enjoy the rest of your pregnancy!!