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Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

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Original poster

Sex after childbirth

15 replies

WTS2020 · 21/07/2020 13:20

Candid post warning!

I’m a first timer, only 10 weeks myself but I’m curious what sex is like after a VB. Does everything snap back into... its previous size!? Or is it a bit more roomy down there? 😂

I know lots of women will be different but just after experiences so I know what to expect!

OP posts:

MichelleOR84 · 21/07/2020 20:53

It felt the exact same for me . My husband couldn’t notice a difference either . I must be wider though as tampons don’t stay up me the same way 😳

Spottybluepyjamas · 21/07/2020 21:10

We had sex 9 weeks post partum... My husband couldn't feel any difference, and I can't now either (although I think things have definitely moved around a bit!). Make sure you use lube though - and lots of it!

Spottybluepyjamas · 21/07/2020 21:11

Gerdticker · 21/07/2020 21:13

I had some Vulval tears in labour (Natural, in the water, small tearing only) that haven’t quite returned to normal. So it looks a bit different, but I think sensation for my partner and I is the same luckily.

That’s after just one child though, at age 33. I would imagine age might make a difference?

These things do take time - for me it was a quite a few months before I felt normal again. I definitely wouldn’t recommend rushing back to try sex until you really want to, so it would be good to manage your partners expectations, depending on how things go for you in labour and the early mad days of parenting a newborn

SqidgeBum · 21/07/2020 21:15

We didnt DTD til about 12 weeks after my VB. I had stitches that didnt heal well. But, DH said he didnt notice any difference and after a while it was back to normal. I never noticed anything getting 'roomier'. I am 25 weeks pregnant on DC2 now and hoping its the same this time around.

Iminaglasscaseofemotion · 21/07/2020 21:18

Leave it a good amount of time. We had sex for the first time 3 weeks after I gave birth. It wasn't sore but it was a horrible feeling. My fanny is clenching up just thinking about it now!
I'm pregnant again now and I will be waiting at least the recommend time.

crazychemist · 21/07/2020 21:45

DH and I had sex 5 weeks post partum. It was RUBBISH. Breastfeeding can make you really dry, so you definitely need lubricant, and I felt really roomy. DH said it was only slightly noticeable, but he kept going too deep and banging my cervix in a very painful way!

That experience put me off for a while. Tried again at about 12 weeks, and all fine, although still quite dry (and found that was the case until DH started feeding less at about a year). So basically, I’d say don’t rush into it, as I think it does take a few weeks to get back to normal and it’s off putting haviNg crap sex - I did have a bit of a panic and think I’d ruined myself forever!

MerryGoRoundBrain · 21/07/2020 21:55

I didn’t have sex until 4 months after birth, so considerably later than pp. i had a very easy birth, a few stitches, no trauma in that sense but I was just so tired, tearful, hormonal that sex really wasn’t on my mind.
Sex is actually better than before birth. I am not sure how but things somehow moved and refurbished and DP can hit the right spot much easier than before and I orgasm a lot easier.

Gerdticker · 21/07/2020 21:58

@MerryGoRoundBrain ‘refurbished’

Devon1987 · 21/07/2020 22:18

My partner felt no difference 6 weeks after, however it took a while for me to find it pleasurable again. No pain for me but just no sensations. But I think that is part of the healing. Now 2 years on it's better then pre birth.

physicskate · 21/07/2020 22:21

Had sex 8 weeks op (after no sex through ivf pregnancy). It felt weird/ horrible. I had a forceps and episiotomy birth. Dh felt no different.

Luckily, now over a year op and things are completely different. Feels different (tighter?) than before. Took a good 6 months after the birth for that to happen though.

Finding time/ energy to have sex? Now that's a different story!!

eandz13 · 21/07/2020 22:42

I had sex around 3/4 weeks pp and it was crap. Very roomy at that point and generally just a weird feeling. Was very aware a baby had just come out of there. Not sexy. It took me 6 months-a year before I started feeling more pre baby muscle 'tightness' and it began feeling actually good again rather than meh.

Sunshine1235 · 21/07/2020 22:49

Sex at 12 weeks pp, tried at 8 weeks but I just freaked out. Not painful but very aware that a baby had just come out of there and it all felt a bit strange. Breastfeeding and sleepless night killed my libido for the best part of a year but after that sex was better than before!

FindingNeverland1 · 21/07/2020 23:11

Tried 2m after birth. Very painful for me. Left it until 4m and it felt fine, DH said it felt just the same, I didn't notice any difference.

However(!) looks wise it's not as tucked in as before. This was my second. Had my first early 20s and this my second early 30s and there is definitely a difference!!
Almost 6m pp... in general haven't recovered as well from pregnancy and childbirth this time around. I do think age matters.

Original poster

WTS2020 · 22/07/2020 00:04

Thank you everyone for your honest replies!
I’m 34 and so if age plays a part it might be a tiny issue for me but we’ll see! Thank you x

OP posts:

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