Terrified of pregnancy

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So really what it says, this is my 2nd pregnancy, my first ended in miscarriage. I went into this one with negative thoughts straight away after a brief overload of happiness it faded into worry, I’m 10 weeks now and feeling more positive about it not ending in miscarriage again I feel like I couldn’t let myself be happy because if it happened again I’d be heartbroken. BUT as time goes on and I am more confident in the pregnancy I’m becoming petrified of something going wrong and my life or baby’s life at risk, I have suffered with severe anxiety before I have a tendency to overthink and have irrational thoughts but pregnancy is scaring me, I’m scared of it going horribly wrong I feel like all you hear is horror stories, I’m petrified of the epidural and know in some situations it’s not optional I’m petrified of taking and being given drugs even if they will help me, I’m scared of hospitals, it’s all overwhelming me and it’s so upsetting I just want to enjoy my pregnancy, I don’t know why I’m posting or what response I want, I feel desperate to be calm and happy right now, if you’ve read me ramble on so much thanks in advance

Tell your midwife

I do plan to tell her my worries, she has told me I’m very high risk as my mum had pre eclampsia & a blood clot whilst pregnant so did my mums mum, I’ve been referred for tests to see if I need blood thinning injections to be safe she said, also to take aspirin from 12 weeks daily and honestly I think this has been the trigger for me because the thought of these complications is terrifying

I’m sorry for your loss OP

Some worry is perfectly normal, I know I worried from the moment I saw the two lines, the worries just change as it progresses

But this sounds like it’s really getting to you, you must speak to your midwife ASAP to get help

They know you are high risk and will monitor you closely, and you know what to look out for, so I’m sure everything will be fine xx

Thank you @Rainbowchampagne I’m sure you are right, and I will deffo speak to my midwife about my worries. I think a lot of it is hormones as well xx