What happens if breastfeeding doesn’t work out at hospital?

[Aug122020]

Hi!

Wondering if anyone has any advice :)

I want to try and breastfeed (first baby), but I’m not totally set on this and am not opposed to formula in the slighest.

I was speaking to a friend who advised she ended up in hospital 5 days as her baby was struggling to latch and the Midwife’s made sure she stayed til baby was happy with feeds.

With covid at the moment my partner can’t stay at the hospital I’m delivering at longer than 4 hrs post birth, and once he has left he can’t come back.

I really really don’t want to end up feeling like I’m obliged to stay days on end, I’m just worried the staff will try force breastfeeding if it doesn’t work out, when really I’d be happy to switch to formula if it means DH can see his newborn baby.

Has anyone got any experience with this? I’m quite an anxious person and if something is pushed on me I don’t really know how to decline.

If it’s not working do you just tell the midwives you want to switch and formula feed? I have tuberous breasts so it may be an issue breastfeeding which is why I’m concerned, I’ve always known I might struggle so I don’t want to force myself and put loads of pressure on myself to do it if it isn’t working.

Such a tough time to be giving birth, when partners can’t go in the post natal ward. I feel for you.

I would have a private lactation consultants number at hand (they are quite pricey so not always an option). With my first she saved my nipples and with my second I messaged her before I even left hospital arranging a home visit. I know they probably can’t visit at home but a FaceTime call would be beneficial as you can get 1-1 support at home and they can watch you over the phone and give you guidance.

Also, I gave both my babies bottles of formula from birth and breastfeed, my 18
Month old still has one feed a day now!

Best of luck to you and wishing you the best.

And yes to telling the midwives you want to sweep to formula or combination feed (which is formula and breastfeeding)

Private lactation consultant.

I stayed in hospital for 7 days after DS and still no milk resulting in a starving very upset toddler and me listening to midwives pressure me to keep breastfeeding

If I have another DC I will have a private lactation expert on call to help and come around my house

I had a c section 18 months ago and always planned to breastfeed. Milk is often delayed coming in after a section so I was flexible about also giving formula from the start. After 24 hours I was up and about and ready to leave hospital, but the midwives were keen that I stayed in for another day or two to give me more support to "establish feeding". I didn't personally feel there was anything they could do for me in hospital that I couldn't get from the community midwifery team at home, so I asked to be discharged. Once my milk came in properly we had no issues with feeding and I'm still breastfeeding now, albeit only once a day at bedtime. DS was always combi fed with a single bottle a day from birth, which was great for giving me a bit of a break too. Remember that it's your body and your baby, you make the final decision

I would say your friend's experience of being kept in for days is unusual. Does your hospital have any feeding support that you can access once you've been discharged? Mine did which was great as I just went back or called them whenever I was worried (my DD was tongue tied so it was tricky to feed for a while).

Also, is there a Baby Cafe near you? The one near me is running on zoom at the moment but they will have someone you can speak to to help.

Personally, I was willing to try breastfeeding, I had a few days in hospital after birth while I had antibiotics. I found I didn't like breastfeeding and told the midwife I would be using formula. She was very patronising tbh, "at least you tried, you tried though didn't you, it's such a shame" 🙄

One of the worst things I found whilst pregnant was the pressure and assumption to breastfeed. There's nothing wrong with bottle feeding if that's what you want to do in the end

I'm 10 weeks pg with DC 2 now and I've said from the off it's not for me and I won't be doing it.

I’m considering expressing some colostrum to take to the hospital frozen, your milk won’t come in for a few days apparently, it’s colostrum to start with.
I don’t want to bottle feed though, so just hoping it will work out, hospital can also help with a pump apparently if struggling.

Ask if your hospital has a specialist breastfeeding midwife. I struggled at first as I was really weak from forceps and haemorrhage and my son was poorly and in SCBU. He was cup fed formula to begin with but then the specialist breastfeeding midwife spent an hour with us helping me get his position and latch right and after that I had no trouble with breastfeeding.

@Hatscats

I don’t think this is needed, you could easily hand express colostrum at hospital if you need to, the MW can show you how.

In answer to your question no they don’t push breastfeeding if you decide you want to use formula; I started off breastfeeding and then on day 2 (I was in for 2 days for a c section) I decided I wanted to switch to formula and there was no issue.
Having said all that I think in your circumstances if you want to breastfeed but come out of hospital quickly then have details of who can help you in the community. I know people who didn’t find the hospital a very easy place to get to grips with breastfeeding so they came home doing formula top ups alongside breastfeeding and then transitioned to exclusive breast feeding at home.

I took a box of premade small glass bottles of formula with dc and said to midwives after a full 24 hours of trying and it being hell on earth "I'm swapping to formula"

They didn't say anything. And why should they?!

In your position I would have a pack of premade formula (the newborn packs that come with the sterile teats) in your hospital bag. If you don’t need them you’ve only wasted a few quid but if you find you want to switch you will have them to hand and you can do it yourself. The midwives should respect your decision either way though. In my experience they only tend to push breastfeeding if they can sense you are undecided - if you are firm they will let you get on with it!

@OverTheRainbow88

It definitely can be needed. I produced absolutely nothing, not even colostrum, for nearly 2 weeks after DS was born. Had I started expressing towards the end of my pregnancy, that might've been different and I could've given my son expressed colostrum rather than formula.

And unfortunately @user1493413286 some hospitals do push breastfeeding. To the point where it can impact the mothers health and mentality. I'm glad you didn't experience that, but many women do and I think it's better to be prepared for it

Hi that's unusual they kept your friend in for so long, I thought they kicked you out ASAP! Is there no bf support in the community in your area? My area is very pro bf, there are "breastfeeding buddies" who go round the postnatal ward and then do follow up visits at home. I think it's great for those who want /need that and if you think it would be beneficial I'd see if they have them in your area. I personally found it too pressured, giving birth is so overwhelming. I was trying to get used to being a 1st time mum and these buddies kept coming round going on about how great bf is in quite a forceful and patronising way. I'd fully intended to exclusively bf anyway but I felt almost like it wasn't my choice anymore and stressed me out. There was no information given about how to safely make up formula feeds and I felt like I couldn't admit to "failing" by saying actually I hate bf and I want to switch to formula. I used to get this weird rage with the milk let down and a horrible toe curling feeling. Also I never seemed to be able to produce enough milk but I persevered for 5 months for fear of being judged as a failure by health visitors and bf buddies. This time I'm going to try bf and hope I feel differently about it but if it doesn't work out I'm not going to beat myself up about it. And I won't be taking any s* from the hv and buddies. Its your body, your baby and you know what's right for you. A contended mum makes for a happier baby. As long as they are fed and loved nothing else matters. You do what you feel is right for you and your family. If bf doesn't go great in hospital but you want to persevere, I'm sure you can get the hang of it at home where you'll no doubt feel a lot more relaxed. I bet there's loads of info and advice on mums net as well. Good luck whatever you decide

This happened to me, LO couldn’t latch, it was the first weeks of lockdown so was on my own (FTM) in hospital, recovering from a c section with little support from midwives. They wanted to keep me in longer to get her latch sorted but my phisical and mental health was going downhill fast being on my own, so We have ended up exclusively expressing as a result- initially it was just a way to get her feeding and out of hospital, now life revolves around the pump.

Had life been normal we would of def stayed in hospital longer to get bf established but I just couldn’t do it with their total lack of care during Covid.

With DC1 I asked for help and a lovely lady, not sure if midwife or not, sat with me and gave me support. With DC3 I was left to get on with it, out after 24 hours with each. Take a few bottles of the ready made milk with sterile teats.
Definitely ask if you need help though, I think if you don't speak up you can get overlooked. If baby is having plenty of wet and dirty nappies they'll be keen to get you home.