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Anyone with a large age gap between children?

20 replies

Ginblooded · 07/07/2020 13:32

I'm due my second baby in August and my first born is now 9 1/2! I also have a DSS who is 6 😊

I'm just looking for experiences with large age gap siblings - I'm sure it won't be a typical sibling relationship as they won't be growing up together as such but I'm hoping they will all still be close.

My midwife also told me to expect baby's birth to feel like a 'first birth' again as the body almost resets itself after 10 years and I'm on the cusp!Shock

OP posts:
HathorX · 07/07/2020 14:06

Hi, my DD was 8 when my son was born. No other kids. They play together all the time, my son (now 17 months) adores his big sister and she adores him equally. I expect they won't be friends until adulthood, but I couldn't have asked for a better sibling relationship for my DD given such a large gap.

In some ways it is a very easy life for me! My DD is a fun and fairly responsible playmate for the toddler and she finds him very entertaining. Yet she is independent enough she often wants to do her own thing so there is no competition for my time, no sibling rivalry as such.

You're right they arent growing up together but I have been pleasantly surprised that the novelty of having a kid brother hasn't worn off.

2155User · 07/07/2020 14:11

10 years between my brother and I.
Not massively close like some siblings but still absolutely love and adore each other.

Nittersing · 07/07/2020 14:16

I had 3 children in my early 20s and then a 4th in my 40s.
My body remembered exactly what to do and it was my easiest birth yet. I t was certainly nothing like my first birth and I'm certainly not in the same fit condition I was in my 20s.
I raised this topic with my midwife. She said in her experience that even with a very large gap between babies it doesn't mean that your body has forgotten what to do.

WeeDinah · 07/07/2020 14:35

I'm very interested to know this also, I'm due in 5 weeks. My 2x DS are aged 19 and 17 so a very big age gap for me, I am having another DS and he is measuring on the 27th percentile so im getting induced at 38 weeks. I am so nervous because it's been such a long time.

GalesThisMorning · 07/07/2020 14:41

14 year gap! It's a joy tbh. I had my first at 22 and he's off to university soon. I'm so glad to be able to continue the hands on parenting, I want ready to be done. My 2 are obviously not 'close' but they love each other and are brothers.

HeathClover · 07/07/2020 14:41

Our 3rd baby is due in 7 weeks🥰 have son who is 11 and daughter who's 9...unplanned and never thought we'd have another but we're all very much looking forward to a new baby! Can't comment any further at this stage😍

SecretWitch · 07/07/2020 14:43

There is a gap of 11 years between my first and third child.

GalesThisMorning · 07/07/2020 14:43

Motherhood is easier this time around, by far. I feel like I've been through it and I see how it 'ends' if that makes sense. I'm not half as worried as I was with my first as I know that kids just generally kind of turn out ok, and those early concerns don't really matter in the long run.

Twizbe · 07/07/2020 14:44

My mum is 20 years younger than her oldest sister. Her other siblings were 18,11 and 5 years older than her (WW2 was to blame)

She was closer to her nieces and nephews growing up. The eldest of those is a year younger than her.

I don't think any age gap is a guarantee of closeness. That just happens as it happens

SecretWitch · 07/07/2020 14:45

Sorry, pressed post too soon.

My body totally remembered how to give birth. My labour was 6 hours long, no tears, no stitching. I went home 12 hrs after giving birth.

Annu786 · 07/07/2020 17:07

I have a son who is 17 and I am expecting very early days only 5 weeks so I will be in a similar situation

MissHoney85 · 07/07/2020 17:14

I am the third and last child, my sister is 7.5 years older and my brother is 9.5 years older. It worked out nicely for me! All the perks of being an only child but none of the drawbacks. No sibling rivalry, my sister was my hero growing up and always took good care of me. I wasn't massively close with my brother but have always loved and admired him a great deal. My mum was also a lot more laid back with me - she knew from experience that everything would pass, good and bad, so just enjoyed me and drank it all in.

Alderaan · 07/07/2020 17:21

DD is fifteen, DS is six months. They love each other very much, but it's a bit of a shock to the system for me to start again

DappledOliveGroves · 07/07/2020 17:25

I have a 19 year old daughter and expecting a baby in February (early days, I am currently 8 weeks). It'll be a gap of 19 years and 11 months when this one is born!

CoalTitCafe · 07/07/2020 17:25

Not quite, but I was 7 when my little brother was born. Apparently I hated him and tried to put him in the bin on more than one occasion!

I was expected to be a third parent, growing up, so I was pretty resentful but we get on well now that we have both grown up.

Superscientist · 07/07/2020 17:28

The age gap between me and my younger sister and my older sister is 7 and 11 years respectively. We are very very close and people are surprised that we aren't closer in age.
Growing up, I had more issues with my little sister (4 year gap) than my big sister. Big sister was always big sister where as there were times when my little sister and I had similar interests then a year later we had a big/little sis relationship then after a while we had the same interests and became friends again and repeat.

AnotherEmma · 07/07/2020 17:30

There's an 8 year age gap between me and my younger sister. We are incredibly close. When we were growing up, she was more interested in me than I was in her Blush But I always loved her and am very grateful for her now.

I think it must have been a challenge for the parents to keep us all happy at such different ages, but the upside of significantly older siblings is that they are more responsible and independent so can probably cope better when you are dealing with a demanding baby/toddler.

omg35 · 07/07/2020 17:34

There will be 9.5 years between DD and new baby when it's here!

I was hoping for an easier birth this time!

There's 13 years between me and little sis- it is a different relationship because she is so young and still at the age where she knows everything. I'm hopeful that will improve when she's out of her early 20s though 😂

alphabetti · 07/07/2020 19:29

There will be an almost 15year gap between my now youngest and new baby. There is only 20month between my other 2 so I’m definitely experiencing both small and large age gaps. My partner has an almost 6yr old though. My oldest who is 16 is so excited and can’t wait for the baby to arrive!!

bluebell94 · 07/07/2020 19:37

Slightly different perspective, I was 9 and my brother was 7 when the 'happy accident' that was my sister came along 😋
Me and her have always been incredibly close and I loved helping to look after her when she was a baby and teaching her new things. Also came in handy for babysitting duties when me and my brother got a bit older ha.

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