How do i deal with grief while pregnant?

[Daisysandviolets]

I'm 28 weeks pregnant and just found out my grandad who I'm incredibly close too has bone cancer and doesn't have long left. If I'm honest I'm struggling to deal with it, and I don't want to cause any harm to the baby and I just wondered if anyone else has experienced loss while pregnant and what helped them?

I'm making myself eat as I have too for the baby but I'm struggling to sleep which is giving me headaches and I just lay in bed crying or thinking about everything trying to process it all. I think I also worry about my mum and if this will make her unstable.

Just feel a bit lost I guess :(

Sorry that you are facing this
I lost my mum 10 weeks ago she my best friend in the whole world I was 33 weeks pregnant i honestly didn't sleep a wink for about 4/5 nights when I did finally sleep I would sob and sob and have bad dreams

I ate for the baby but took no notice if she was kicking or anything

She is now here and 10 days old but I won't lie being so in love with your new born and having the 24/7 heartbreak of grief is extremely hard and consuming to deal with both those huge feelings at once x

I'm so sorry to hear this.
Sending lots of love.
I found the bereavement boards on here very useful. I don't know how to link to them but have a lot or ask to out this thread there instead.
It helped to know I wasn't alone.
And despite the all consuming grief my child was fine. Absolutely fine - despite me carrying through some horrific times and having to hear me howling (both while pregnant and in those first months) with grief.
She's now a happy well adjusted child.
A friend said - while pregnant babies are parasites, they are born in war zones, they will take whatever it is they need. I found (and still do) some comfort in that.
Xxx

I discovered I was pregnant then spent the next 10 hrs watching my mum pass away from a brain tumour. That grief was compounded by being dumped a few weeks later because baby's dad didn't want a family with me. 5 months into pregnancy, boxing day, my grandad passed away. Being pregnant in itself was the ONLY thing that kept me going.

My daughter is 4 now.

I'm okay.

You'll be okay too

I just wanted to say I'm thinking of you and can relate. My Dad has a stage 4 brain tumour and his health has rapidly declined in the last 4 weeks going from working and generally being ok on the chemo to losing the use of his left side and being totally bed bound due to the tumour spreading. We have no idea how much time he has left but I will be surprised if he meets our baby due in 14 weeks time based on recent events.

It's so hard isn't it and it's impossible not to get upset. I keep telling myself babies are born healthy and well in far more traumatizing situations than my body is experiencing right now. I try to just let myself feel what I'm feeling and cry because otherwise I get more worked up, anxious etc. Baby seems to be fine from appointments and all the kicking he does.

Sending you virtual hugs x

Hi

Really sorry to hear about your Grandad, have you tried talking to McMillan nurses? They are there to help the whole family and can be a great source of support.

I lost my mum and gran within 10 weeks of each other earlier in the year and am now 9 weeks Pregnant. I found taking each day as it comes works for me, so if i feel sad i embrace it, i cry and eat crap. If im feeling ok i go with it. I had some counselling and they recommended getting a journal and writing letters to my mum and Gran about whats going on as a way to communicate and it helps clear my mind.

Mindfulness has also helped with sleep.

Sending love and strength for you to get through this awful time x