Work problems

[jellyjem]

This is a what would you do question really.

I'm 25 weeks and absolutely worn out working, mainly from the commute. I leave my house at 8:00am every day, walk 15 minutes to the train station and then have another 15 minute walk the other end when I get off plus the same again when I go home. I don't get home until nearly 7:00pm.

Its killing me, I get leg cramps, the stitch right across my bump and my heart pounds like I've been running a marathon. All this is made worse because I can't sleep at night, I just can't get comfortable.

I've aske my boss if I could work through half my lunch hour and shift my hours slightly starting work 15 minutes later and leaving 15 minutes earlier which would mean I could catch an earlier train home and would be in at about 6:15pm instead of nearly 7:00pm. He won't hear of it. Told me theres no way as we're short staffed at the moment.

I have an appointment with my midwife on Friday, does anyone know if she would be able to force my company to reduce my hours. I still have at least 6 weeks at work before I go on maternity leave and I'm really worried what all this is doing to the baby.

Sorry about the misserable me, me post but I feel so tired and emotional with all this I could just sit down and cry today.

Dear JellyJem

Not sure on the legal situation - you could get the midwife to sign you off sick for a bit. Do/did you have a health and safety assesment at work? In my company that guy can seriously influence my line manager if I need something - ie. scheduled in breaks etc.

Talk to the midwife Friday and if its too much take a day off anyway. You've got enough going on without feeling that way about work.

Also got this number from DirectGov website - Acas Helpline on 08457 47 47 47. They offer free, confidential advice on employment rights.

Sending you both warm smile

awww you poor thing. I totally sympathise as i also leave home at 8am, have a 15 minute walk from the station to work and then get home at 7pm. I hate commuting!

Dont think your MW can force your company to reduce your hours. Although you're not actually reducing them are you? You're just shuffling them around a bit to accommodate you a bit. Is it really your boss's decision about whether you can stagger your hours slightly or should you be going to HR/personnel instead? At the end of the day, I'm sure your employers have a duty of care to you and should give you some sort of leway.

Go over your boss's head and either speak to HR or to his superior.

Try not to stress about it tho - it wont do you any good and stressing about it isn't going to change the situation if they still say no. Just plod along and do what you can do.

I'm 10 minutes late for work every single day, but i really dont give a damn because there's no way i'm going to get the earlier train as it would mean more than likely standing for the entire journey. However my firm are quite relaxed and no one has ever said anything about it.

Anyway, good luck and keep your chin up!

RG (31+1)

Hi - thanks for the replies, I've already spoken to HR, she just told me to talk to our director but he's ignoring the issue. Keeps fobbing me off with excuses. I've never had a health and safety assessment either even though I've asked for one. I'm just so sick of all this. They've not even sorted anyone out to do my job when I'm off yet and I've told them I'm taking holiday from 2nd November and starting maternity leave on the 17th, its like they think all this will just go away.

I think I might just go off sick for a few days, if I could just catch up on my sleep I think I'd feel better.

Get your midwife or GP to sign you off work.
Your company is making you ill by refusing to rejig your hours. And what you're asking isn't unreasonable.
Put your baby and yourself first and sod work. After all, they haven't done right by you so why should you work yourself into the ground for them?

This Health and Safety stuff is important. We should know our rights on the issue... this comes from www.direct.gov.uk/en/Employment/Employees/WorkAndFamilies/DG_10026556

All employers must give you a safe and healthy working environment. There's extra protection if you're pregnant, which is a good reason for letting your employer know you're pregnant early on.

Risk assessment
Your employer must carry out a risk assessment of your job to find any possible risks to you and your unborn child. These risks might be caused by:

lifting or carrying heavy loads
standing or sitting for long periods
exposure to toxic substances
long working hours
Your employer must then either remove the risk or remove you from being exposed to it (for example, by offering you suitable alternative work). If neither of these is possible, your employer should suspend you from work on full pay.

If you think you're at risk, but your employer doesn't agree, you should first talk to your health and safety representative or a trade union official. You can also go directly to your employer to explain your concerns. If your employer still refuses to take action, you should talk to your doctor or call the Health and Safety Executive helpline on 0845 345 0055 (8.00 am to 6.00 pm Monday to Friday).

Amazing - My arse of a boss must have heard me talking to my Mom on the phone (either that or he's logged on to Mumsnet. He's having a meeting with the director about my hours now, they didn't invite me so I'll just have to see if they come up with anything.

If they don't I will ask my midwife to sign me off, I really don't think I'm asking for a lot just to change my hours round a bit.

My boss likes to arrange "meetings" at 3:00pm and not come back and I think that has a hell of a lot to do with his attitude, if I left work early there'd be no one to field his calls so he'd be more obliged to come back into the office.

Thanks for the info Widget, maybe my director is explaining all this to my boss now, they've been in the meeting for ages. If not at least I can argue my case better now I know the score.

It really is within my rights to ask to change my hours round then?

Fingers crossed for you

The thing is 15 mins either side is actually nothing. i cant belive he is makign a big deal out of such a small amount of time.

Maybe your boss was prompted by all the nasty pregnant vibes going in his direction from us all - he had me scowling and I don't know the man!

I think, with your midwife/doctor on side, they will have to do something about your working hours. They are not exactly in a strong position if they've never given you an assessment!

Stick to your guns Jellyjam. Your midwife can't make your employer shift your hours around but she can sign you off sick. Your employer needs to realise that they're better off having you there, working your hours (albeit starting and finishing at slightly different times) and feeling happy and well than to have you off sick because you're so exhausted.

You should definitely demand a health and safety risk assessment too. Your employer's obliged to do one. Hours of work and commuting can be covered by the risk assessment too I think.

Also, has your blood iron level been checked recently? I know that I found the 25-30 week period especially difficult and it turned out my iron was really low (apparently that's when your iron is most likely to drop) and as soon as I started taking iron supplements I felt better. I only mention it because a few of the things you mention like the pounding heart sound a bit like low iron (although they also sound like general pregnancy symptoms ). Good luck.

They're still not back yet.

Thats interesting about the iron deficinency, I'll mention it to my midwife on Friday. She did say last week that my blood pressure was quite low but I don't know whether that could be making me feel so tired. She's going to check my bp again Friday to see if its improved.

Thanks for your support, I'll let you know how I get on.

Jem x

Hi

Poor you! And what an inhuman boss you have -he needs someone to send him on an equal opps course, with a special a 'pregnancy in the work place' module built in.

I was struggling at work too (I'm 19 weeks), and my manager was being pretty unsymapathetic so I went to see my GP - I've been signed off for 4 weeks. Phew. I was so relieved I nearly cried on the spot. Nothing my boss can say now. Fortunately my company has a pretty decent sick leave policy, so my pay and my maternity leave don't get affected.

I would strongly suggest a visit to your GP --they are normally very good with pregnant women, I hear, and don't put on a 'brave face' just tell it like it is. You've got a whole other job to do and you're working bloody hard at it right now - ie at making a whole new human being inside you - so, as I see it, any work you do over and above that is an incredible act of bravery. (Btw the hospital/midwife/obstetrician can't actually sign you off - only your GP can.)

If you don't want to take time off yet, maybe your GP can write a note recommended shorter working hours or something.

Good luck - hope things work together. And, please - look after yourself, if you don't no-one else will.

Well my boss is back and sat glaring at me. I asked if they'd come up with anything and all he said was "Nick (the director) is going to have a word with you, I didn't realise you'd already spoken to him about it" He's obviously p*ed off with me because I've gone over his head.

So I'm sat here still not knowing whats going on. Suppose I'll just have to be patient and wait for him to talk to me, if he has'nt spoken to me in the next hour I'll try and tackle him about it but he's not very easy to talk to.

Gawd, this really shouldn't be so difficult should it. I hate it here.

I would just add to the chorus of, go off sick. I was signed off for the first few weeks of pregnancy when I had a horrific situation at work and was also convinced that my pregnancy wouldn't be ok. The rules at my work, which I think are based on the legislation, are that if you go off sick with pregnancy related illness 11 weeks before your due date or later (ie if you're 29 weeks or later) then your maternity leave starts at that time. So at 25 weeks you're fine. If they don't sort this out very fast - and very nicely indeed, given the nonsense you've already put with - please think about going to see your gp who will have no problems signing you off. I would make sure that it says 'work-related stress' rather than just 'stress' on the form, too, but then I'm quite bolshy that way and also work in the public sector where benefits etc are taken relatively seriously. You're unlikely to be allowed to work through your lunch hour as it's a legal requirement but really, they either get half an hour less of you or none of you. Their choice.

Just to say if you do go off sick with a pregnancy related reason they can't legally start you m/l until four weeks before you are due (it used to be 11, but this changed a while ago)

Also if you are still going to take a half hour break at lunchtime there is no problem with this from the legal (working time directive) point of view as the legal minumum is 20mins if you work more than 6 hrs. However if they complete the H&S risk assessment it may be that you need additional breaks during the day too, they are obliged to comply with this & provide a place for you to rest - it's a legal requirement.

As has already been said, if work won't support you in making what are reasonable adjustments to enable you to carry on working then just go off sick, there's nothing they can do about it. This is from someone who didn't do that first time round, was working 10hr days (it ws a really busy time & the work just kept piling on in) whilst begging them to appoint my replacement as I knew this would continue long after I'd gone off. I ended up being admitted to hospital for a few days with high BP at 32wks & signed off work for the remainder of my pregnancy - work eventually appointed a replacement 10days AFTER I was originally supposed to have gone off (36wks). You don't get any better thought of for struggling on - you & your baby are what's important now.

Jelly,

What is your company's sick pay policy like? Check that out because it won't really help you to get signed off if it's crap!

Assuming it's not, have you thought about asking your midwife to write a letter along the lines of "due to fatigue, etc, etc, recommend altering working hours to... and if this adjustment is not made will be looking at recommending signing off work entirely as present situation not acceptable for mother and baby's health" type thing. If you want to keep working, it might be the kick up the wotsit they need...

Jelly Been following this thread all morning, have no experience as my work place was very accomodating in my pregnancy esp with my sciatica.
But they should do Health & Safety and agree surely its in their interest to have you there, so should be able to shuffle your hrs about a bit!

The sickness policy here is really good, we get up to 6 months on full pay so that should be fine if I do decide to just go off sick for a couple of weeks.

The problem is I'm the only full time secretary here at the moment as my friend is currently off work for 6 weeks with a fractured shoulder. I feel guilty about signing off sick just because I'm tired.

Might try the suggestion about getting a strongly worded letter from the midwife.

6 months full pay?? Blimey!! That's brilliant! At my place, all we get is 8 days at full paid and after that it's unpaid, so even if i wanted a rest and to be signed off sick for a week or two, it would do me no favours because i would not get paid!

RG - blimey, 8 days in a whole year? Thats terrible, what happens if someone at you place needs to have an operation or something?

I really should take advantage shouldn't I. It'd be there own fault for ignoring the issue for so long anyway.

If you need an op then i think it's just tough sh1t! 8 days for the whole year is diabolical isn't it. Add to that the fact that we only get 20 days holiday a year too and it seems like there's no escape!

You should deffo deffo deffo take advantage of all your sick time available!

Jellyjem, pls don't feel guilty about taking sick leave when pregnant. Everyone tells me this is the one time in your life when you should jettison the guilt part of your brain... bec its not really yourself you're putting first anyway, its your li'l one - who is quite helpless a this time and is totally relying on you to keep yourself as healthy and able and safe as you possibly can so that your body can do what it needs to to protect your baby and give it a fantastic start.

I do know about the guilt thing - its my first pregnancy and it took me a while to realise that its not my 'fault' that I'm fragile right now - and even if there are other (super)women out there who run marathons until their 38th week, climb Everest and deliver their babies at the top etc - I don't have to aspire to be like them. SO there.

And being miserable isn't right - under any circumstances. Just DON'T go to work tomorrow and see how you feel. Sounds like your company sickness policy will cover you just fine. Take a day off and be incredibly nice to yourself. If they are desperate, they can get a temp. It happens.

Lightwind (who is currently off work and totally guilt-free - whee!)

You've all made me feel so much better today, I was feeling really rubbish and isolated at work this morning. Thank you all so much, and your right I probably should just sign off sick but I'll have to give it one more go at speaking to the director first after pushing it this far.

If I've still had no joy by the end of the day I am planning on ringing in sick tomorrow and seeing the midwife on Friday. I should probably make an appointment to see my GP at the same time if the midwife isn't authorised to sign me off.

Lightwind - enjoy your guilt free time off

Jem

Hope you get some answers jellyjem! I really feel fo ryou, I leave home at 5.30am and get back at 5.30...its seriosuly making me very tired,and like you cant really sleep at night..im nearly 27 weeks. Pants isnt it eh!

Im going to have a word about hours at some point, but I asked for a new chair 2 weeks ago and still waiting
Hope they get back to you today, and if not the midwife can help x