Pregnant -Do I cancel my own hen do ??

[Kaylrw]

Hoping for a bit of advice, my fiancé and I suffered an early miscarriage last year and decided to wait untill after our wedding (supposed to be aug 2020) to try again, however covid had other plans and so we have now had to move our wedding to next June. However, we have recently found out I am expecting which was not part of the plan (only 7 weeks along) and if everything goes well I will be due end of feb. My hens have already paid to move their flights to next April to reschedule my hen do - but I will have an 8 week old baby. What on Earth should I do ? P.s The hen is 3 nights away abroad, I would also hopefully be breastfeeding. Just hoping for some advice really I know if it was a friends hen do I would be able to politely bow out but as it’s my own and all my friends have already spent hundreds and won’t be able to get their flight money back I’m really stressed - can’t bare to let everyone down ! Thank you

I should hope that your friends would be happy for you!
Congratulations on your pregnancy. They can always decide to go without you if you don't want to go, or you bring the baby if you want.
I was 35 weeks pregnant at my brother's wedding. I had to travel to Barcelona by train as I couldn't fly so it was a faff but people didn't mind as they were just happy about the baby.
Please don't worry about this.

Any Chance you could pay to move their flights?
Are they friends from the same friend group?

Not the same group at all unfortunately - they’re a mix of old school friends, uni friends, family and work friends - so think it’s unlikely They’ll want to go without me - hadn’t thought of paying to move their flights though - I would be more than happy to do that (even if it only bought a few more weeks). Thank you for your suggestions - I’m a worrier at the best of times !

Move the flights but do it for more than by a few wks!!

I'd say you have three options:

1. Move the flights to an earlier date while you're still pregnant (Nov?) - sure you can't drink but can still have a good time with your friends without any stress.

1. Bring baby and someone who can help babysit. At 8 weeks they're so portable and easy going. This way you might be able to enjoy a drink too (even if you breastfeed as long as you pump/formula).

1. Delay the hen do until after wedding. Oct/Nov next year? I'd guess that before baby is 6 months you will struggle to leave them and travel to another country (though everyone is different!)

Personally I'd go with option 1 or 2 as it's hard to know how you'll feel about leaving baby behind.

At 8 weeks they're so portable and easy going this isn’t a given, no offence to the poster - but you don’t know what kind of baby you will get.

@OnlyFoolsnMothers true and fair point!