Partner not interested in sex

[Mangolady12]

Hi. I am 17 weeks. We normally have sex a few times a week. We started off ok during this pregnancy but DP has lost any interest and it is really getting me down. I have instigated it but that was once in 3 weeks. When I tried to instigate it last night he firmly moved ny hand up to him chest and held it there and continued reading.

There is a second layer to this aswell as he has given up alcohol for about a month and is prudish unless he has been drinking.

We had big issues with him drinking and agreed he would stop which he has done and it hasn't been easy for him, but I can't help feeling really hurt about it and are my options a drunk for a partner or no sex the rest of my life?

Anyone in a similar position? I think he struggles to have sex when I am pregnant and being sober and a prude on top doesn't help either but I can't help feeling hurt.

Hi OP. First off, you must be so proud your partner has stopped drinking! Amazing commitment from him!
With the sex side, you are not alone. I'm 25 weeks and me and DH have had sex twice in that time. TWICE!!! 😭😭😭😭
He has become extremely aware there is a baby in my belly and he doesn't want his penis anywhere near him!
He has assured me it's not me, but he just finds it really weird and gets put off by knowing baby is right there!
He is still extremely loving and affectionate towards me, but I have accepted the fact that there will be no sex until after baby has arrived and my body has healed itself.
Trust me, you are not alone and I'm sure there will be many more ladies that tell you the same thing!
Try not to put yourself down too much. A lot of men are the same as yours.
Invest in a vibrator and keep yourself entertained for the time being! Something is better than nothing! 😝

Thank you @lockdownpregnancy. You have made me feel a wer bit better. I have just felt so down about it all day.

We did talk about it and he says it "it's not you it's me" 🙄and that he is just adjusting to not drinking and doesn't like the idea of sex and also being pregnant he is worried there too as I thought but none of that makes me feel any better.

My first marriage ended with a partner who went off sex despite us having had a great sex life for years and in the end I left him as we had no spark and no love left. I don't relish the thought of it happening again and do have a bit of a hang up about it.

It isn't like I need it all the time. Once a week would be enough at the moment. I thought it is supposed to be ther other way round that the women don't want sex and having to put their men off.

He says we will sort it tonight but a pity shag when I know he doesn't really want to does nothing for my self esteem or is in anyway a turn on.

We used to have amazing sex multiple times a day but looking back it was always when he had several drinks.

Think being hormonal today doesn't help.

DH and I were finally getting back into the groove after the birth of our toddler, only for me to get pregnant again! I was then way too sick to entertain the idea for a few months... And now I’m 20 weeks he’s getting a bit squeamish about it! It’s really hard. I think you have to accept that pregnancy and having young children does change things for a while. But it definitely helps if you’re on the same page and can talk openly about it. It sounds like DH has done a great job with quitting drinking and probably needs some time to adjust.