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Found out last night I'm pregnant

6 replies

RaeBeam · 01/06/2020 13:01

I found out last night I am pregnant, this was the first month we tried so although it was "planned" I didn't expect it to be so quick.

This is my first child and I don't have any close friends that have had babies before, so this is completely new territory for me.

I just wanted to ask you ladies who have had a baby before or perhaps are further along with your pregnancies... Is there anything that you wish you had known when you were where I am? Or have you any advice at all on what happens next?

I can't stress to you how little I know about children and pregnancy, so please, however obvious it may seem - every comment will be appreciated.

Also, if there's anyone reading this in the same boat, please say hi! Would be good to talk to someone who knows how I'm feeling at the moment.

Thank you :)

OP posts:
BeingATwatItsABingThing · 01/06/2020 13:26

Firstly, congratulations! Flowers

Secondly, it doesn’t matter how many months of TTC or how many children you have already, there is likely to be a moment of shock when you find out you’re pregnant. I have a 6yo and had been TTC DC2 for a year but I still had an ‘oh shit’ moment after finding out I am pregnant. It wasn’t straight away. There was nothing but pure joy with the two lines on the tests but a couple of weeks in, I started to panic. I’m now 24 weeks and massively nervous and excited.

Do you know when the first day of your last period was? That will give you a rough indication of how many weeks pregnant you are (you’re not actually pregnant for the first couple of weeks). You’ll need to ring your doctor’s surgery and get an appointment with the midwife. This first one will be when you are 8-9 weeks(ish) and is called the booking in appointment.

If you’re not already, make sure you get some vitamins for pregnancy. Pregnacare do one but I’m sure there are others too.

crazychemist · 01/06/2020 13:29

Firstly, congratulations!

I’m assuming as it was planned you already have folic acid/a multi vitamin with folic acid in?

Don’t feel like you have to get everything sorted in a hurry - pregnancy takes aaaaaaaages and by the time you get to the third trimester and want to have things sorted, you’ll feel like you’ve been pregnant half your life! You have lots of time to get travel systems/cot etc sorted, so do take your time to shop around and make sure you ask other people for opinions - e.g. some buggies are much easier to fold one-handed than others, which makes life much easier! Definitely don’t rush out and buy lots of baby clothes at this stage. Lots of people will give you things for your newborn, and they grow out of that size in less than a month (sometimes in days!), so you don’t want to have a tonne of stuff that you won’t use. I’d strongly recommend accepting hand-me-downs - nobody will see the vest your baby has under their grow, so who cares if it’s new? It’s going to get covered in poo explosions anyway!

I always assumed you made a doctors appointment when you were pregnant, so I did. I made an appointment, and then felt like an idiot when my GP was like “ok, so you’re pregnant. Why are you here?”. In my area you were supposed to give your dates and ask for a booking in appointment with the midwife for about 10 weeks. This time round, I phoned to ask to see the midwife and was told that it’s now done directly through the hospital and they have an online form that you fill in. Phone the receptionist at your GP and ask them what you should do, and do this as soon as possible as they’ll need to get back to you about your booking in appointment and first scan.

You will be amazed by how quickly you cope once your baby arrives. When I was expecting DD1, I had no experience whatsoever and was rather nervous about how to undress a baby without hurting them/not supporting head enough. I had no idea how much they needed to sleep/eat/be entertained. The thing is, the early days are so incredibly repetitive (you’ll be feeding them every 2 hours or so, probably changing their nappies about the same) that you actually become an expert quite quickly!

Don’t be afraid to ask for help. Experienced mums will have been there, done that. They know what’s normal and can tell you if something isn’t.

I was not ready for how crap I would feel 3 days post-partum. The hormonal swing was so much more intense than I’d expected, I felt like I’d been hit by a big miserable bus. I was sobbing, and when my DDs nappy leaked, I just couldn’t face it and was seriously considering getting scissors to cut her clothes off to make it easier. My breasts were enormous and felt like they’d been filled with hot concrete, and they were so swollen my DD couldn’t latch and was getting sprayed in the eye! Honestly I felt like a total failure of a human being. Alas, this is totally normal. It should pass very quickly, the next day I was fine (except for the painfully swollen boobs, they took at least 5 days to feel better).

PinkDiamond1 · 01/06/2020 13:35

Awwh how amazing and so quick too!!

We had the same fell pregnant first time with both ours. As I've not had experience of trying for longer all I can give you is my experience and I totally get it!! It's like yes you're taking your multi vit you're having the obligatory sex and then you miss a period and you're like huh?! We've just started this! So I remember both times thinking OMG I'm pregnant!! I think oddly a slight tinge of disappointment - or maybe that's not the right word I think more like I thought this would be a journey. Although I think I would have been dissaponted the second time if we didn't fall pregnant in the first month and we did!

There is a great book - what to expect when you're expecting I think get that to read.

Also do phone your GP and they will probably give you your midwives number to book an appointment

Also I had an underactive thyroid so had to increase my monthly dose during pregnancy

Keep up with your pregnancy vitamins

Strawbellie · 01/06/2020 18:16

Hi! Found out last week that I'm pregnant with my first, was spoken about but not planned 😬 still trying to wrap my head around it a bit and don't think it will feel really real until I see it on the screen!

I don't have any close friends who have been through it either and not telling anyone until 12 weeks anyway!

I have been in the process of changing doctors surgeries so have found the whole doctors/ booking in/ hospital thing a bit of a mind field but reading these forums has really helped me learn a lot already, you should join one of the due in (assume Feb 2021) groups to hear about how other people around the same time as you are getting on 😊

ItsMischerWavy · 01/06/2020 21:22

I was like you! Always wanted children, was told I couldn't so pushed it all to the back of my head. Actively avoided babies and children and should I encounter a baby was too scared to touch it lol.

Then I randomly fell Pregnant. Then I fainted. Then I panicked. Then I went Into much so that by my 12 week scan I'd convinced myself it was all a mistake, the poor sonographer must ha e thought I was a right prat when I saw the screen and immediately shouted "OH MY F**KING GOD THERE'S A BABY IN THERE!"

My daughter is now nearly 3 and I've still not got my head round being pregnant 😂

My best advice would be this: don't put pressure on yourself to feel a certain way/act a certain way/do certain things. Everyone is different, everyone has a different experience and feels things differently. It doesn't make you wrong or weird.

Also, people go on and on about "the rush of love" - if it doesn't happen to you, you're not awful or doing it wrong (I didn't get it and beat myself up over it for a long time)

Congratulations 💐

DressingGown87 · 01/06/2020 22:09

My little piece of advice would be that no pregnancy is the same. I expected the typical sore boobs, morning sickness, etc. Instead, some days I just had mild cramps. I had none / very few of these early symptoms, so convinced myself every / something was going to go wrong. I’m 20 weeks now, and had my scan today, and other than being awkward, cheeky, and a pain, she’s fine. You read and hear so much about these symptoms, but like my midwife kept saying to me, everyone is different, every pregnancy is different.

Check what the standard practice is for your area. Some will get referred through a GP practice, some you do on online self referral to the midwife. You should be able to find out online. The first few weeks dragged for me, to the point you have your booking in appointment. Good luck!

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