Advise - planning a baby and a wedding

[Missdeedeex]

Hi All,
Hope you are all well during this time!
Just wanted some advise really.....
We were due to get married this year and were going to try for a baby straight after. However our wedding is going to be postponed because of you know what (hate even mentioning it anymore, annoys me!!!). So now that’s totally messed up our baby plans. I don’t want to be pregnant on my wedding day, I have spent years planning and I just want to have a good time. If we also wait longer, due to health issues on maternal side, I am worried I won’t be able to have kids the longer I wait. So now I am stuck on what to do. I know there’s never a “right” time for a baby in most cases, and you don’t fall pregnant straight away, it could also take months/years. But I just don’t know what to do.
I mean, if we try for a baby now, and successfully get pregnant, the baby will be around 4-5 months old at our wedding. Is having a bubba that young at our wedding going to be difficult? I know I sound so selfish but I have always pictured the perfect wedding day. Have any mums on here had a bubba around the same day on their wedding days, if so any advise? We only have one kid in my family so I am not clued up with babies/children.
Anyway any advice would be great! I also hope you don’t think I came across like an ungrateful selfish person. I am just someone who likes to have everything planned out x

It depends if you want the baby or wedding day you imagined more.

We did baby first then got married last year when she was 2
It wasn't how I pictured my wedding day, my dress was different to what I'd have chosen, we spent less than probably would have done and I never imagined having my child at my wedding but you know.. It was perfect! For us it was a marriage rather than a picture perfect wedding day. It was so special to have her part of it and she talks a lot about when we got married (she thinks she married mummy!!) and it was hard at times on the day becs grandparents decided not to give her a nap and then trying to do our photos/get her to eat/find care for the evening etc. It all worked out and we said we may renew our vows in the future so this baby will get to be part of that as having dd at our wedding was special for us all.

It's hard to plan when you don't know how long it takes but if you do get pregnant and it ties in with wedding dates could you postpone?

Hard one to help with but whatever you choose I wish you a long and happy marriage and family life in the future

I think the family history of early menopause changes everything. Alternative is to do some rounds of ivf egg collection and store the eggs. It's expensive and not great fun (I'm doing ivf at the mo). I comprised on my wedding as my mum was diagnosed with a terminal illness. We had a bit of a rush wedding but I don't regret it for a second. You need to work out what is most important for you and your dh. With your family history delaying the wedding further may mean no biological kids. Maybe pay for some fertility tests and go from there?