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Anyone else experiencing major second time mum guilt?

3 replies

Twitchett22 · 14/05/2020 18:52

I'm 8 weeks pregnant with my second. I feel like absolute crap. I'm exhausted, I feel nauseous, and I have a 2 year old to look after. So the days usually consist of letting her watch tv all day because I'm too tired to do anything else. DPs working shifts so some days he's here to help and some days he's not. Just feeling like a really crappy mum and now keep thinking when I've got a new baby and I can't concentrate on DD like I have before I'll still feel like a crap mum. Anyone else get this and is it completely ridiculous?

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Pygmyseahorse · 14/05/2020 19:08

Definitely feeling the same!
I'm 9 weeks with dd 3, I've had such severe sickness and tiredness I can barely function and the guilt for not doing anything with her some days is awful, especially with lockdown. I'm lucky she's at that age where she potters about and plays but it is so hard

Also worrying about how she will react as she's attached to me at the hip.. Very clingy since lockdown and will be 4 roughly the same week baby will be born

I keep thinking maybe I'll get a new load of energy in the 2nd trimester and can make it up to her then..

Hope you feel better soon.. I'm sure young children won't remember these weeks in the long run

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Twitchett22 · 14/05/2020 20:01

I'm glad it's not just me! You're right, she is at that age where she won't really remember and she loves watching tv so is probably loving it, I just feel like I should be stimulating her a bit more! I'm hoping for an energy surge in the second trimester too 🙈
Hope you're feeling better soon!

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CoodleMoodle · 14/05/2020 20:11

Ah, bless you. I felt the same when I was pregnant with DS! DD was 3 when we found out, and turned 4 about halfway through. We didn't tell her until 20 weeks and tbh she didn't actually notice that Mummy was falling asleep or not feeling up to chasing her around.

I did eventually regain some energy and could play again. In the meantime we did lots of games that involved me sitting on the sofa and DD bringing me things!

They're 6 and nearly 2 now and DD has suffered no I'll effects (she doesn't even remember me being pregnant, really), but some days my energy levels are roughly the same as they were back then

Good luck with it all!