Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

Flip

1 2

Original poster

Hypnobirthing without the judgement

37 replies

CoolNoMore · 14/05/2020 14:14

Hello! Can anybody recommend a hypnobirthing book/ audiobook/ source that's not utter hippy bollocks?! I have been told that I am really quite likely to be induced with syntocinon again and I'm ok with that, because it will be in order to save my baby's life. Although I found the epidural to be a magical, wonderful relief, it did make DS1 very sleepy (seemed great at the time but led to weight loss and he was re-admitted to hospital a few days after we had been discharged). So I'd like to do as much of it as I can on my own. Hypnobirthing seemed like a good idea.

The audiobook I'm currently slugging my way through keeps making shitty little comments that is putting me off the whole thing:

"She opted for an epidural, so of course it all went downhill from there."

"The birth was painless, because she didn't need to feel pain."

"So many women use pregnancy as an excuse to lie on the sofa..."

I'd rather have some sort of SAS torture resistance training, I think. Someone yelling at me that YES THIS IS INSANELY PAINFUL BUT YOU CAN DO IT or similar. Also if they threw in a 'medical intervention is not the end of the f*ing world' that'd be good. This woman keeps on talking about the cascade of intervention, and I'd rather not be constantly reminded that this birth is going to be far from my ideal. Any ideas?!

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

FerneGreene · 14/05/2020 14:20

Have you read the positive birth book by Milli Hill? Not hypnobirthing really bit quite good (at least so far, I haven't finished it yet!).

Otherwise, following to see if anyone else had suggestions.. I've been told hypnobirthing is great, but the sort of thing mentioned on the OP really puts me off!

Blackopal · 14/05/2020 14:21

I used the Self Hypnosis Hynobirthing CD by Maggie Howell.

My delivery did not go to plan. I was in labour for days and all sorts went wrong however, throughout I was very calm.

I kept having snippets of the cd come into my head and I do think it helped me.

I don't remember much judgement on the CD and I am the least hippy person so I would recommend.

I listened to it in the afternoons and it always led to a little snooze so that was a bonus too.

Good luck with everything.

NicNac100 · 14/05/2020 14:25

I second the Positive Birth Book by Milli Hill! So good!
also Hypnobirthing: Make Your Birth Better by Siobhan Miller - she's also the founder of the Positive Birth Company - check her out online
Both books really changed my attitude to birthing - I was absolutely terrified before, I'm a little anxious now as being induced in less than a week but overall feel SO much more empowered and positive about it :)

Persipan · 14/05/2020 14:29

I could only find resources that all started by saying that we need to leave behind all our negative perceptions about birth, and then immediately segued into anecdotes about how awful the writer/presenter found induction and how it was a terrible mistake. Curiously I did not find this hugely helpful.

Areallthenamestaken · 14/05/2020 14:32

I'm listening to Holly De Cruz - Your Baby, Your Birth. She actually ended up having an emergency Caesarian and is very pro hypnobirth and birth choices, rather than judgemental about pain relief. One of the exercises is thinking through what pain relief you might like and making sure your birth partner knows so that they can advocate for you and make sure you get it if you need it. I really like it and my husband has found it useful to listen to as well.

BuffaloCauliflower · 14/05/2020 14:34

Positive Birth Company - book and online course. Focus is preparing you for all births, from totally natural in water with flowers on your head to emergency C-section

Blackopal · 14/05/2020 14:35

I honestly think need to just ignore any of that judgment. The writers are influenced by their own experiences etc.

I found most judgement and talk of the terrible cascade of intervention came straight from NCT group I attended! Was bizarre, sad faces from the leader when discussing C Section, being told exactly how long each phase would last etc.

Birth is so unpredictable, none of that judgement and assumption is helpful at all, should be treated with the respect it deserves.

MammytoElla · 14/05/2020 14:48

I second the Maggie Howell hynobirthing. I needed to have an induction as baby would be 'better out than in' and required the syntocin drip. I found it helped. I've always liked yoga so continued through my pregnancy and found that helped also.
Didn't do full hypnobirthing as I required gas and air.
But found it helped! Xx

Selfsettling3 · 14/05/2020 14:53

Second/third positive birth book and online hypnobirthing course. They are by different people but both are really good.

HildaSnibbs · 14/05/2020 14:59

Another vote for Maggie Howell Natal Hypnotherapy. I can't remember much of it now but I'm very sceptical and it definitely helped me to relax and cope with the pain a lot better (once I remembered to use it)

I read her book and listened to the CD, and I read all the sections of my pregnancy book with incredibly detailed info on interventions, positions, what can go wrong etc... I had a difficult first labour and more straightforward second one but had some interventions each time, and nothing I read left me with the feeling that it was "my fault" or my body's fault in any way, which is something I've seen people say about hypnobirthing. I wanted to be fully informed on the medical
stuff and also to equip myself mentally for dealing with the pain....in contrast to one woman who walked out of our hospital antenatal class when they started talking about possible problems
/ interventions etc saying that her hypnobirthing teacher had told her not to listen to or read anything negative about birth (!)

stillathing · 14/05/2020 15:27

Maggie Howell CD is great! I used it twice. Not especially hippy or judgy I think?

In normal life I'm quite pathetic about pain but I had particular reasons for not wanting an epidural that I won't bore you with. The joy of hypnobirthing is that it relaxes you to be able to cope with whatever the situation throws at you. Second little bugger baby was back-to-back, which was much more painful, and I was aware of that but able to just let the sensations pass through me.

Typing this is making me realise I could do with some of these skills in everyday life right now!

Gerdticker · 14/05/2020 15:32

@CoolNoMore

Which cd/book is it you’re reading/listening to? It does sound like bollocks!!!

madcatladyforever · 14/05/2020 15:39

I'm sorry it's absolute bollox. Epidurals don't make babies sleepy normally, my baby was fine and wide awake. I suggest your baby was sleepy for other reasons.
My latest GP re my chronic 30 year back pain following an accident took me off all my painkillers and told me to replace them with meditation and mindfulness. I put in a formal complaint and my normal medication which I have down to a fine art has been reinstated.
It is excruciatingly painful being induced, I tried a birth without it and was in absolute agony. It speeds up the contractions and makes them 10 times as painful. No amount of hypnotherapy unless it involves a baseball bat to the back of the head will manage that.
I was screaming for the epidural within 3 hours.
I don't normally talk about the pain but if you haven't had it before you really need to be warned.

Mucklowe · 14/05/2020 16:07

Hypnobirthing is for paranoid middle class women who can't bear to call a contraction a contraction. Surge? Give me strength...

Blackopal · 14/05/2020 16:22

MsSquiz · 14/05/2020 16:23

I did the positive birth company online pack, but I didn't really get on with it...

The only thing I took from it, I also was told during antenatal classes - breathe in for 4 and out for 6-8. That got me through the pain until my epidural was in, and then each time the epidural wore off and had to be increased!

firstimemamma · 14/05/2020 18:03

Positive birth company digital pack. I did it and it was great there's a whole section called 'how to have a positive induction experience' (I can't remember the exact wording but it's definitely called something along those lines).

The audiobook you've currently got sounds awful and definitely not what I understand hypnobirth to be.

Good luck with everything.

UrsulaSings · 14/05/2020 18:34

To be honest, I've found the positive birth company/hypnobirthing more unhelpful than helpful.

I was blissfully unaware of how scared loads of people are of labour. It's not something I ever felt anxious about, and the reason I tried hypnobirthing was to practice techniques to manage labour more effectively. The words contraction and pain were not problematic for me.

Now I feel like labour is something I should be scared of and I need to have all these techniques to 'cope' with it, and pain and contractions are bad naughty words that will fill you with fear if you hear them!!

Great! Thanks for that!! I feel loads worse now!

traceyg08 · 14/05/2020 18:39

I'm enjoying the Milli Hill book too.

I'm also reading the Marie Mongen book which is very in depth, might be too much for some people but I like lots of information her relaxation track is my favourite so far but I still feel like it's missing something.

It's not a book but I've been listening to The Positive Birth Story podcast, which is a series of interviews with women about their experience of birth, I loved it and it's really helped me get into the hypnobirthing mindset.

I also listened to two audiobooks by Hollie DeCruz and Sophie Fletcher. The Hollie DeCruz one seemed fairly basic but practical, I didn't like the relaxation though. The person reading the Sophie Fletcher book just made me want to sleep, still trying to get through it, but I am enjoying the content.

Shmithecat2 · 14/05/2020 18:43

@Mucklowe

Hypnobirthing is for paranoid middle class women who can't bear to call a contraction a contraction. Surge? Give me strength...

🤣🤣. Well, quite!

Auntgiraffe · 14/05/2020 18:51

I actually think you are onto something with the SAS torture resistance training.

I did a local hypnobirthing course and had that drip, I found the pain so overwhelming, so fast that all the techniques went out of my head. They were quite wooly though and I think something I bit more CIA torture survival might have helped!

Twitchett22 · 14/05/2020 19:04

I'm not into any hippy type stuff at all but I liked the idea of hypnobirthing as I didn't want to rush straight into all the pain relief. I used the Maggie Howell one too on YouTube and I don't remember it being too hippyish? I don't know if it's more mind over matter that hypnobirthing helps but whatever the reason, if it works for you then great. I didn't get chance to try it as my labour was only an hour long and the midwifw chucked 2 paracetamol at me and told me to stop being dramatic 20 minutes before DD flew into the world 🙃

EarlGreyT · 14/05/2020 19:17

also Hypnobirthing: Make Your Birth Better by Siobhan Miller - she's also the founder of the Positive Birth Company - check her out online

I would not recommend this or the positive birth company to you despite the above and several other PPs suggesting it. The author has had a negative experience with induction and is pretty anti having an induction so I really don’t think it is the book/course for you. And it is definitely not the military style approach you’re after.

HildaSnibbs · 14/05/2020 20:18

Mucklowe don't beat about the bush, tell us what you really think 😂

I actually kind of agree with you about the language issue - but that's what I mean about the CD I used, there was no issue with the words pain or contractions as far as I remember, it's something that would have annoyed me, so I think maybe that's a difference between hypnotherapy and hypnobirthing. It was just about managing the pain on a mental level.

The reason I found it worked I think was because the shock of the pain - DD1 was back to back so I was in constant pain, couldn't tell when I was having a contraction or not - put me into a kind of panic mode and I was trying to somehow fight it ( if hat makes sense?) but when I got past that and was able to to draw on some of the breathing and relaxation techniques that's what made it bearable by stopping fighting it and then somehow it was easier after I had to give up the gas and air because was making me throw up

So I'd say the hypnotherapy sounds like it's a different approach to the hypnobirthing which sounds a lot more "woo" and not my style...

MammytoElla · 14/05/2020 21:09

I was never a fanny who said you couldn't use the word contraction etc or used the twinkly lights and music etc. I used it to breathing techniques and help to keep me calm. Also I couldn't be lying on a bed and I can't keep still when I have pain. Even though I was hooked up to all the drips and monitors I was able to be in the position I wanted and spent most of my time on the birthing ball leaning over the bed! I do think Maggie Howell and yoga helped x

Flip

1 2