Termination of pregnancy

[IJustWantToEatChocolate]

OK, this is a hard one for me to write. I already have four beautiful children. After our fourth was born we said we were done. We have been successfully used contraception for the last three years but last week i was late on my period. Long story short im pregnant. Probably about 5-6 weeks. Me and my partner have discussed at length our thoughts and wishes and both come to the conclusion that we dont want another child. I was supposed to ring the doctor today to make an appointment for termination but i just cant bring myself to do it. Just need some support or words of wisdom.

I can’t speak for anyone else but personally if you feel like this is the right decision for you and for your existing family then you’re doing the right thing.
I had a termination a few years ago - my circumstances were different from yours but there was at no point during the process that I felt like I’d made the wrong choice. It was really difficult and emotional but I didn’t regret doing it and I still don’t to this day. It is a hard choice to make though and I understand how difficult taking the first step can be but at the end of the day it’s your body and your choice and if it’s what you want it’ll be okay

Do you think the termination is what you really want as you couldn't bring yourself to ring the doctors.
Could you have another conversation with your husband?

Thank you both for your replies, its just nice to have someone to talk to apart from my partner. He's very supportive and loving and says he will go with what i want. We both agree that life is good and we just about manage with the ones we have now. Im juat starting to get back to work so financially we are abit better off. For me the medical implications are huge as iv had to have sections with all four and the last wasnt good. I cant see myself going through it all again but i just have a tiny doubt in the back of my mind. Im a great believer in fate and "what will be, will be". I have no issues with termination and have always been pro choice. I just feel like, what if its meant to be! I really dont want to go through pregnancy and birth, i dont think i can cope with it, physically or mentally. But i also feel like im intervening with whats meant to be. Does that make sense? Im not sure if it does? I said to my partner, if i could have the baby without all that id do it.

I dont have many words of wisdom to share but just wanted to say that just go with what your heart says OP because the heart never lies . This will be a tough decision to make but you know you, your body, your family, your circumstances best! I wish you the very best of luck in the choice you make and will be praying for you .

Thank you. Thats the trouble. Everything points to a termination and sensibly i know thats the right thing to do but my heart tells me that i could have another baby to love. I love being a mum and know i could cope with the baby and children, we just get on with it. I judt cant do the medical bit before hand. I had another chat with my partner. He thinks it will be too much to cope with and is worried about me medically. He said what if we loose you!! Now that i didnt think about. I just dont know. X

It'll be ok OP, it's a horrible position to be in especially if you were using contraception but 5 children is a lot to cope with not to mention the financial burden. I think you would be making the right decision in terminating.

Go with your heart not your head. People rarely regret not making the logical choice but going against your heart, your gut and instinct, will always end in deep regret.

Don't really have any advice for you but didn't want to read and run. I thought 3 c-sections were the absolute limit, 4 is supposed to be dangerous so 5?? Might be a good idea to get a medical opinion about this? Could be easier to make a choice if you have all of the facts from a medical perspective. If this would put your life at genuine risk then that's something to seriously consider.

If it wouldn't be life threatening then just go with your gut feeling. If you think you could cope then you probably can. If you think you will have regrets then you probably will.

Sorry you are in this situation. Hope you are able to make a choice you feel comfortable with.

Thank you everyone. It bring such calm to me know that there are people out there to listen. Girlmum91 thank you for leveling my head a little. Im going to try and make an appointment tomorrow with a veiw to go ahead with termination but talk through the risks as i know they will say they dont advise that i continue. When i had number four there were lots of risks. I was going to try natural but towards the end I worried that there was something wrong with my baby boy. It really affected me mentally and they said it was safer for my to delivery via section due to excess water and cord prolapse risk. I would love nothing more than to continue but we are truly blessed with the ones that we have already and i now worry that i may be putting my own health at risk. Thank you all. X