Finding out the gender

[EBM20]

Before I got pregnant we spoke about the idea of not finding out. Now I'm pregnant i want to find out and my partner doesn't. Everyone is constantly asking is it a boy or girl, when are you going to find out, oh its defently a boy as partners side of the family is strong with boys. Every time we talk about names and I suggest a girl name I feel like I'm shut down by my partner as his reply is the baby will be a boy so give up on thinking of girls names. It really upsets me. Were not in a good financial situation due to us both losing our jobs due to the coronavirus. I feel like it would be better financially to find out as it will make it easier to buy second hand and for family to pass things down. I honestly didn't think I would be so upset about this!

We're not finding out, my partner really wanted to and I really didn't, we sat down and had a conversation weighing up the pros and cons and agreed not too. I did tell him that if he wanted to find out I would never stop him I just didn't want to know and therefore nobody else was to be told until after the birth. I made him aware this meant no buying gendered items or discussing names as I would have figured it out. If he doesn't want to find out that's fine but you still can and just be mindful of the fact he doesn't want to know. If he won't discuss girls names then pick one yourself and if you have a girl it's going to be tough tit and too late for his input so you will have full day on the name 🥰 and I can honestly say we've spent no more/less by not finding out, lots of whites and greys and will put money aside to buy a couple more bits when the baby is here if we need to. I plan on buying a girl and boy outfit just before I'm due for the coming home outfit and will return the one we don't need 🤷🏽‍♀️ good luck, but as others have said he needs a good talking to, stand your ground

Personally i think it will be too difficult for you to know and not tell your partner, its bound to slip out at some point.

It isn’t “bound to slip out” at all. I’ve done it twice and it hasn’t slipped out either time. Even during labour I managed to say get it out. Partner had no idea of the baby’s sex either time and obviously I didn’t tell anyone else either.

With my first baby 15 years ago my husband wanted to know but I didn’t. So we had it written on a piece of paper and he swore he wouldn’t tell me. He didn’t. We shopped for both boy and girl items, I’d leave the shop and he’d go back in and buy what we needed. It worked for us but I really wanted a surprise so didn’t ever sneak a peak or question him. Could that work? Obviously he didn’t tell anyone else either.

I haven’t found out with my 4 other pregnancies either but my new partner doesn’t want to know either. I think it’s really special delivering a baby then learning the sex. Plus after coming very close to losing a child and not meeting them for 24hrs while doctors fought to save their life I have absolutely no preference either. Just excited to have a little baby :)