Preparing myself for miscarriage

[CJP25]

Hi all I'm 6w & for the last 3-4 days I've been bleeding. It started with just brown discharge then dark clots & today every time I wipe there's more clots & some red blood.

I had an early scan at 5w due to pain & bleeding & because my first pregnancy ended in a ruptured ectopic. This showed an intrauterine yolk sac but now I'm pretty sure that I'm miscarrying.

I just can't believe this is happening again & feel like my body isn't strong enough to carry a baby. I have a scan on Monday but I'm preparing myself for the worst. These next 5 days are going to drag so just looking for some support x

Didn't want to read and run OP.
I'm so sorry you're going through this! I can't even imagine how you feel! 😢😢😢
This forum is amazing, as (unfortunately) there are many women that have been in a similar position to you and will give you some comforting words to ease the process (I hope).
I wish you all the very best and fingers crossed you get to be a Momma eventually!
🤞🤞🤞❤️❤️❤️

Thank you so much for your kind words. I know there's nothing I could do or could have done if the worst happens but it still feels like a kick in the teeth. I thought after the first loss I would be more prepared but if anything it's worse this time.

I just have to try & remember that I can get pregnant, and be grateful for that as it's something some women wish for. Trying to stay positive until my scan. Hoping for the best but preparing for the worst x x x

Hi, I feel very sorry for you dear. I'm in a similar situation. I'm 7-3 weeks now. I was hoping to get some morning sickness or other symptoms but nothing. Last week started having brown discharge and mild low back pain. Went for a scan but they can only see a small gestational sac even though I was more than 6 weeks. And today I kept feeling again lower back pain and found more dark red bleeding. My next scan only next week but seems I should stop hoping and be prepared mentally for bad news 😔.

I didn't want to read and run, but i wanted to say i'm thinking of you

Fingers tightly crossed for your scans ladies. I know exactly how you feel OP, I had two pregnancies end in miscarriage last year and it is miserable. Absolutely get the feeling of your body letting you down as well, one of my MCs turned out to be an anembryonic pregnancy and I was absolutely fuming that my body had ‘tricked’ me into thinking I was pregnant for 10 weeks. It really didn’t help
me at the time people saying ‘at least you can get pregnant’ but, having had a friend go through a horrendously long IVF journey, I do appreciate that fact now. And as a positive ending, I am now 24 weeks pregnant with a little girl and everything is going well, so it turns out that my body does know what to do, we just had a couple of false starts.

@CJP25 We are here for you as a community! This really sucks luv, and i'm sorry this is happening to you. Never give up!

Thank you everyone for the support  I'm new to this app so not sure how to reply to you individually but I want you to know I really appreciate you reading & replying.

I've pretty much come to terms with things now, the bleeding is too much & all my pregnancy symptoms have just gone. I don't feel pregnant any more which I think might be helping me accept things.

Tushka9 I'm sending you love & support It's such a crappy time to have to go through this. I think cos I'm not working I have no distractions so my kind has just been going into overdrive with worry. When is your scan? I'll be thinking of you

Thanks everyone for support and kind words.

CJP25, my next scan is scheduled on Monday. Still not sure if I should request an early visit from my EPU. I doubt they will let me as my pain is still bearable and bleeding is not too heavy.

To be honest I don't know what is to blame this time (had MMC last October) since I had plenty of time to rest and tried to be very careful.

Tushka mine is on Monday as well. I phoned them this morning & they said they wouldn't bring the scan forward as their policy is no less than 2 weeks between scans. They said they could get me in early but I'd still have to go in again on Monday.

I'm just trying to keep in mind that these things just happen for no reason sometimes. You can do everything you're supposed to do & still have things not go right. Then people who don't realise they're pregnant go out, drink, smoke etc & still have a healthy pregnancy. It's really just one of those cruel, crappy things that life throws at us.

I'm really sorry you had to go through this. I'm preparing for the worse tomorrow. I can't believe so many women are going through this with lockdown etc. Glad to know I'm not alone.

I'm really sorry to hear what you are going through. I went through the same 3 years ago. I started bleeding a week after my period had finished (what I thought was a period) and had on and off lower loin pain. I didn't think anything of it but was going to get a Drs appt to discuss. I knew they would ask if there was any chance I could be pregnant so I decided to do a test. I was shocked when It come up positive! They sent me to the early pregnancy assessment unit and I had an hcg blood test taken. I also had a scan which confirmed that it was in the right place (they queried eptopic). I had to go back in 2 days for a repeat hcg which showed that the numbers hadn't gone up as they should do and it could be a non viable pregnancy. I had to wait 2 weeks for a repeat scan and that unfortunately showed that it hadn't grown. So I had a missed miscarriage. I had an operation.
I had what I thought was a period starting on the 15th April which was a lot lighter than usual and only lasted 3 days. Then a few days later started having brown/pink on toilet paper when I wiped. Started with pain also. I took a pregnancy test which came up with a very faint positive. I waited for the next day and did a clear blue digital which came up with pregnant 1-2 weeks. This is 1-2 weeks since conception so since my last period in March would make me 5 weeks. When I was pregnant with our son I had severe sore breasts and nausea. I have had the nausea but only slightly sore breasts at the moment. I'm scared the same thing is going to happen this time. I rang and spoke with my gp who spoke with the epau and they have said because of the Corona virus they are reducing footfall through the dept. So I have to take another pregnancy test next Wed and if still spotting to speak to my gp again and they may see me at the unit. I hate all this waiting around! Xx

Stockwell01 I know exactly what you mean about waiting. This week has been absolute torture, bleeding for 7 days now & it's the only thing dominating my thoughts. I'm exhausted & just want this all to be over now.

In any other medical situation if you had abnormal bleeding for a week you wouldn't be left to deal with it yourself. It just seems with pregnancy loss you're expected to just accept this can happen, get on with it.

How are things going with you now? I'm sending you positive thoughts

@faithfulbird you're definitely not alone, I've been reading so many threads recently about women who just feel so bereft to be going through this horrible experience at a time when life is challenging enough as it is. How are things with you?

I'm okay I'm just at the hospital waiting to give my bloods for the second time so I can find out what's going on. Scared either way. But I'll deal with it. Really hope it's not ectopic. I don't feel anything but I'm bleeding. Also praying for a miracle. Deep down I didn't want to have miscarriage written next to all the things I've been through but that's what makes us human and it's okay.

@faithfulbird really hoping things go well for you, I'm keeping everything crossed. I think the not knowing is the worst part as your brain just conjures up all the worst case scenarios. Are they going to do a scan today?

Hi ladies
Didn't want to read and run.
I totally understand where you are coming from op I had 2 miscarriages 1at 11.3 weeks and the other at 6.: weeks.
I didn't experience any pain but I did bleed. Sadly for me I haven't been able to conceive again since then and have been trying for the past 5 years.
I do hope op that u get the good news you and enjoy.
For the rest of you ladies I wish u all the best.

Keep us updated xx

Thank you all for your support ladies. Sadly I miscarried last night. As much as I expected it, it was still a terrible shock as I didn't realise it would happen the way it did. I'm ok, I feel the loss badly but in a way I'm calm now as I know for sure it has all ended. I'm not giving up & looking forward to sharing better news in the future x x

Awwww OP, how so very sad 😢 I've been keeping an eye on your thread since initially commenting. even though you were bleeding I think we were all hoping things would turn out well for you.
As you say, at least it's now over and you can grieve properly and know exactly where you stand, though obviously still truly horrific.
Sending very large virtual hugs your way and truly wish you the very best TTC in the future, should you decide that's what you want to do ❤️❤️❤️

So sorry to hear your news! Read your original post and kept an eye for your update so sorry it wasnt the news you were hoping sending lots of love and sincerely hope you get through this very bad time ❤

Hi...I honestly feel for you. I hope God blesses us all with beautiful healthy babies. Just remember it's not your fault at all.

I keep thinking it's something I did. But unfortunately miscarriages are more common than I thought.

My HCG levels went from 1245 to 239 and that's what broke me and made me realise it's gone. Nothing could be seen on the scan prior to the blood test. No sac or anything. I keep thinking where did it go or was it too small to see. But hey what can you do.

How did you know you miscarried? I didn't have too much pain but bled out something which didnt look like a clot. But it was tough. I've stopped bleeding but it feels like it's all happened so quick.

@faithfulbird I'm so sorry for your loss too, I hope you're doing ok. I'm thinking of you & you're not alone in this Please don't think it was something you did, it can be hard to make sense of this but I find the easiest way to cope is not to wonder what happened as I'll never get an answer unfortunately.

I had no pain before, just bleeding. My scan was supposed to be on Monday but on Sunday night I got a slight crampy feeling & went to the loo & basically the sac came out. I was in utter shock, shaking & crying uncontrollably for about 15 minutes. I hadn't read too much about miscarriages & had absolutely no idea it would happen like that so I was just floored.

But if I'm honest, after it happened I felt the loss but also so calm. After the constant anxiety of the last few weeks I finally knew for sure it was over. I feel like I did my grieving last week, I knew in my heart what was happening but still had a tiny glimmer of hope which was torture.

Physically I felt fine at first so decided to busy myself with doing things around the house, taking down curtains, moving furniture...big mistake! Since then I've had constant pain in my pelvis, back & abdomen so I've been pretty much bed bound for the last 2 days. I'm listening to my body now & taking time to heal.

Mentally I'm doing much better than I thought I would. I've accepted that these things happen & it wasn't meant to be this time. I'm hoping to get pregnant again but I'm not going to get obsessed with it like I have in the past.

I'm really hoping that things turn out well for you & I'm sending loving, healing thoughts to you. If you need to talk I'm here x

Hi, can anyone help.. I had an early scan today. Thinking I was around 7+5 or 6 days/8 weeks. Wasn’t exactly sure but around then. I have a longer cycle that’s why. I was measuring at 6 weeks and 5 days, they couldn’t detect a heartbeat and assume I have had a missed miscarriage. Has anyone experienced this? 😭

Hi bc11,

Please don't worry... I've read a lot of cases where they couldn't detect a heartbeat and women have been told to come in for a termination 2 weeks later and then they've found a heartbeat! I don't want to give you false hope but stay positive and have hope. It's the best you can do. They don't always get it right with the diagnosis. I'm sorry your going through this and I pray your baby is fine and that they can detect a heartbeat.

Thanks a lot cjp25, your posts gives me hope to try again. I started doing work as soon as the bleeding finished and omg the pain...I wish someone told me about the pain. I though half my body was getting paralysed from the bottom. It's best to rest it out.

My experience is that we can't plan these things...So I'm the same if I don't get pregnant straight away it's okay...

I felt very tired this pregnancy... always exhausted and tense...how did you feel?

@BC11 sometimes/a lot of times a heartbeat can not be detected until after 7 weeks.
If you can I'd give it a couple of weeks and get yourself a private scan and see. If you haven't bled before then, then fingers crossed baby is ok!