I don't know how to feel.

[trezher]

Hi, I am 23 years old and just found out that I was pregnant 3 days ago. I am anxious, scared, and sadness comes and goes. I have so many thoughts running through my head. This was completely unplanned and came as a big shock. I had no intentions on having kids for atleast a few more years. I wanted to finish school, and just get myself in a better position in life. I just feel like a big mess. I'm scared of gaining weight, since I've always been fit and in shape. I am scared that I won't be able to be the parent that I've always wanted to be. I am upset with myself for not being excited like everyone else around me is. I want to feel better about this, and I have moments of happiness and excitement then comes a wave of just sadness and worry. I am terrified.

Oh dear OP! What a pickle for you! Have you told the Dad? What has he said?
As you have only just found out then you have time to consider all of your options, but if you are with the Dad, then a sit down conversation on what you both want to do may be able to make things more clearer for you.
I've always gone with my gut in any situation and if you know that this is not the right time for you then you do have options.
Some people don't believe in termination but if you know and the Dad know this just isn't the right time for you both, in all aspects of your lives, then you already have your answer.
On the flip side, this could be the best thing that has ever happened to you! It could be the absolute making of you!
I wish you the best of luck in whatever you decide! ❤️❤️❤️

I think a lot of people feel the way you do, even when the baby is planned. Having a child is really scary thing!! I was desperate to get pregnant, but when I found out I was, I cried! All those doubts about being a good parent etc are completely normal.

I finally started to feel better about it when I went for the first scan and saw him moving about on the screen.

And this is someone who was obsessed with having a baby.

I would echo what pp said. I felt like this with a planned pregnancy, so my only advice would be to let the dust settle and let the idea sink in for a while before you make decisions either way. But there is no wrong decision. Good luck

I have spoke to the father and he doesn't want to have this baby. He believes that we are in no position to have a baby. He was recently in an accident which caused bleeding on his brain. I kept trying to think positive, maybe he's just feeling this way because of the accident and he's just frustrated. But now I just believe he's selfish. I've had an abortion before when I was younger, and I just don't want to get another one. I feel conflicted.. I don't know what to do. I don't want to be involved with him. I had actually even broke up with him then found out just days ago I was pregnant. It's overwhelming. I just wish it wasn't him.

OP I think you have just answered your own question, as you have just said you don't want another abortion.
You can do this! If you have a strong family and friends network then you will be amazed at what you're capable of!
My mom raised me and my brother all by herself and though it was hard she had a brilliant support network and we are so proud and grateful of what she did for us.
Either way, you sound like a strong woman, so whatever decision you make, you e got this! ❤️

Hi there, I'm also 23 and 9wks+3 pregnant and it also came as a surprise! You really can do this :) I'm so sorry to hear your circumstances are making it so tough. You're stronger than you know :)

This has helped me more than you guys will ever know. I do have an amazing family and friends. And now I also have this source to talk to other mothers that can relate. I appreciate all of your words of encouragement. This had me so happy!

My partner and I decided to try in January, got pregnant in February. I thought it would take longer and wasn't mentally prepared for it to be so fast. I too had anxiety and spikes of fear, regret and asking are we doing the right thing, would we be any good at this.

Part of me thought we may not be able to get pregnant at all. We've been together since we where 15 and never used protection and never accidentally got pregnant so that's why I thought this.

I'm 12 weeks now and have my first scan on Thursday. I'm still worried and have anxiety but I'm also excited. Admittedly I'm having it with my long term and likely life partner but I think every expecting mother goes through the motions even when planned.

Whatever you choose make sure it's the right decision for you and don't worry about anyone else or their opinions. You don't need a second parent to raise a child. My father raised me alone and he did a great job.

Chiming in again following @Nombie post, to also say that me and DH started trying and we caught really quickly.
I have been with DH for nearly 9 years and after I got pregnant, I also had those doubts of 'oh my god what have I done' and thought I'd made a terrible mistake.
I think whatever your situation, I think it's natural to have those 'Holy Shit, what do I do now?!' moments.
In my own personal opinion that being scared is part of the process.

Hey! I'm 24 and currently 24 weeks pregnant, I too fell unexpectedly and also found out after a breakup with my partner! I felt exactly how you did at the beginning, I wanted to hide it and pretend it wasn't happening. I had a termination at a younger age and it just wasn't an option this time round. It may seem scary now and honestly, I still have moments where I'm like "😱" but I'm SO happy I stuck with my gut. Me and the dad are together but I would have found a way to manage on my own if he didn't stick around.

It will get easier and you will find a way to make it work if this is what you want! Best of luck and congratulations xx