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Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

Original poster

Went into triage today because of reduced movement/mean midwife

68 replies

Fiona1987 · 06/04/2020 18:17

Hi,

I went into triage today because I felt there was a reduction in movement. At the moment I'm 24 weeks pregnant and I have an anterior placenta so my movements are hit and miss and don't happen all the time. I just felt something was off today.
The midwife found the heartbeat within seconds, but she was quite nasty to me. She said 24 weeks is way too early to come in for reduced movements and at this point reduced movements are none of their concern. The way she talked to me was quite snappy, uncaring and condescending.
What she said also goes directly the advice in my pregnancy booklet, where it says: "If you are 17-42 weeks pregnant and experience any of the symptoms below contact the hospital:.......- your baby isn't moving as much ( once you start feeling your baby move)."
Also, my community midwife said that I should never take an anterior placenta as an explanation of why there is a reduction in baby movement.

I feel quite silly now. Was the midwife right that I shouldn't have come in ? She did find the baby's heartbeat and it was fast, but she only listened to it briefly. I feel like she didn't do her job properly, but she made me feel like a hypochondriac. It was quite a terrible experience today and despite finding the baby's heartbeat, I felt worse after going to the hospital.

OP posts:
Woofwoofwooof · 06/04/2020 19:47

I'd raise it with PALS, maybe let them know exactly what youve said here, that it's feedback about how you were treated. I am sure the midwives will have concerns about women delaying seeking help due to fear of coronavirus, being more likely to wait and home longer and avoid coming into a hospital. At the moment a member of staff like this only makes it more likely that some women will not seek help for their next episode. You were right to follow the advice you were given and go in.

Theworldisfullofgs · 06/04/2020 19:52

To be honest, I'd cut them some slack. I suspect they're over stretched and worried. A midwife died today from Coronavirus.

MonaLisaDoesntSmile · 06/04/2020 20:15

24 is early- i was only admitted with my first for check up as I have felt NO movements by then. But she could have phrased it in a much nicer way especially as you called in first.

MonaLisaDoesntSmile · 06/04/2020 20:16

Just to add- you should have come in if you were worried, better safe than sorry, and never in future feel put off from calling and coming in.

MyDcAreMarvel · 06/04/2020 20:19

I monitored it for over two hours and I called the hospital and they said I can come in.
Don’t know what her problem was then, you did exactly as you should have.

mathanxiety · 06/04/2020 20:36

She has absolutely no right to behave so unprofessionally.

This is no picnic for you either.

Please go back if you are still worried, and try to forget the shabby way you were treated. You and your baby are far more important than the chip on this woman's shoulder. Let her attitude wash right off you. Stick to your guns if you feel something isn't right.

I would ask for the protocol for making a complaint asap. She has the right to be tired and worried about the virus. But she doesn't have the right to contradict standard medical advice or discourage you from returning, or do a poor job.

BackyardChickens · 06/04/2020 20:40

That is not okay. Please complain.

BrooHaHa · 06/04/2020 20:45

She was technically right. At 24 weeks you shouldn't be monitoring movements yet or coming in for them, largely because there isn't much that can be done even if there is a problem. That should have been explained to you at some point- the general advice is not to monitor movements until 28 weeks gestation. For some weird reason, that's not on the NHS website, though I'm pretty sure it was in my notes booklet last time. I'll check in a bit to see if it still is.

She should have been nicer about it though.

JustIgnoreTheMoanyCow · 06/04/2020 20:55

If the book said 17-42 weeks, and the hospital told op to come up and get checked, what else should the op have done? She isn't a pregnancy expert, she didn't know it was too early, she was just following advice. You didn't do anything wrong op, that midwife was in the wrong. No need to be nasty, no matter how much stress they are under.

Twolittlebears · 06/04/2020 21:00

You did the right thing op. Sorry you had a bad experience. Don't feel silly.

Susanna85 · 06/04/2020 21:01

They are under so much pressure. I don't think complaining would be the right thing to do.
Is it possible you could be feeling extra sensitive.

BrooHaHa · 06/04/2020 21:02

If the book said 17-42 weeks, and the hospital told OP (original post/poster) to come up and get checked, what else should the OP (original post/poster) have done?

It's clearly an issue with either the book itself or OP's reading of the book. I'd be surprised if it said, 'come and get checked if...'- usually it says 'contact your midwife if...' and you'd then ring the number for the pregnancy assessment unit. Who would then say, '24 weeks? No, you don't need to come in.'

If the book actually says, 'Come straight in if...' then OP is not wrong in having done as requested. But she might be misinterpreting it, which I'd think is slightly more likely, given that the midwife (who presumably sees a lot of those books) also felt that she'd not followed the guidance in it correctly.

Marieo · 06/04/2020 21:08

You did the right thing by phoning first and then going in, please don't let her attitude put you off going back at any point if you are worried (hopefully you won't have to anyway) though. I don't know, she might be stressed, but she might just be horrible, I had a really nasty midwife postnatally who I wish I had complained about, not for 'revenge' but in the hope she wouldn't treat others like that. Do what you feel is right.

whiskybysidedoor · 06/04/2020 21:13

Honestly a lot of them are just like that. I remember getting a similar bollocking many years ago, 24 hours later... it all went hideous. When questioned after she literally said ‘well how was I supposed to know she was high risk.’

A cursory glance at my notes would have helped.

I know we are hugely grateful to those on the front line but it doesn’t erase the fact that a lot of people who work in healthcare are not very nice. Especially if you are on your own. Don’t let it get to you, just look after yourself. If you are concerned, always seek help. Best wishes on the rest of your pregnancy.

cocomelon23 · 06/04/2020 21:16

I'm not sure I had reliable movements at 24 weeks, it does sound quite early to me.
She's probably knackered as all the NHS is right now.

Hannah021 · 06/04/2020 21:20

@Fiona1987 u r still increasing her chances of covid even if the clinic is quiet... And given the situation with covid, whats in the booklet is subject to priorities. You've put urself and ur child at risk by going. Those r public places, all sorts of ill ppl will be visiting

Hannah021 · 06/04/2020 21:22

@FirstTimeBumps .... Oh there is "karen" asking to speak to the manager !!!! Ffs

Marieo · 06/04/2020 21:24

OP phoned first and was following guidance. Can we not make women feel like they shouldn't be 'bothering' midwives with reduced movements.

FirstTimeBumps · 06/04/2020 21:32

@Hannah021 do you just go round trying to throw sarcastic comments just because you don't agree? If it happened as OP said it did. She took advice from the book, called in advance, and was told to come in, she did no wrong. The midwifes attitude is detrimental. It could result in OP not going in in future due to being made to feel stupid. As other "Karen's" have said, it's completely inappropriate. You disagree? Fine. State your case. But grow up and have some empathy for others. MN is full of far to many people who seem to lack a single ounce of empathy, and to think these boards are full of pregnant women who could take your sarky comments to heart... No need really is there?

Wehttam · 06/04/2020 21:35

I’d let it go OP, she could be having a really shitty time working in a hospital, just incase you didn’t realise, there’s quite a crisis happening. 💐

KnobJockey · 06/04/2020 21:40

I was pregnant very recently (6 month old) and in our trust we were definitely told reduced movement from 24 weeks. I actually queried it with the midwife, as I felt the baby from about 17/18 weeks, and was told that regardless, if the baby was in distress, they wouldn't do anything to save her as she wasn't past the viability point. She clearly felt awful saying it, but said it was the trust's decision.

BrooHaHa · 06/04/2020 21:41

Sorry, missed the update where you said you'd called. Midwife was probably just having a rough day, I would leave it.

CeibaTree · 06/04/2020 21:43

Please don't report her. You don't know how busy she was or what she has been doing over the past few weeks.
I agree with this 100%. We are living in unprecedented times and NHS staff are bearing the brunt. Of course she might be like this all the time but maybe this time give her the benefit of doubt. Hope the rest of your pregnancy goes smoothly!

Distressingtimes · 06/04/2020 21:47

but triage wasn't busy at all

But every extra patient that she has to come into close contact with increases her risk of CV.

Frontline staff are terrified.

A midwife with CV has died.

I’m sorry you felt she had an attitude, this is a very difficult time for lots of people, she may not be coping with it all very well. My HCP colleagues and I are crying at work every day-these are very stressful times.

ChakaDakotaRegina · 06/04/2020 21:54

Sorry OP you do sound a bit anxious and only waited 2 hours before you called.

You will be in there twice a day for 16 weeks!

Do you have any mum friends that you could bounce things off?

I’d cut her some slack about being snappy at the moment. Lots of nhs staff off In quarantine as a precaution as they cannot get tested. Lots of staff moved into roles way above what they normally do to cover.