Can I leave DD with parents for hospital appointments?

[BristolBones]

We're expecting twins and also have a DD who is 2. We're having more scans due to it being a higher risk pregnancy with our next one being on Monday. Under the new government guidance, is it ok for my mum to come and look after DD whilst we go the appointment? I understand if I have to go alone but what about when it comes to birth? I'd need somebody to look after DD.

Appointments you can go alone, so you should.

The birth...is a bit different. When are they due?

Is your mum high risk? Over 70 or with underlying health conditions?

Go alone to the scan. DP/DH/DW should stay at home with DD. I would think that your DM would have to mind your DD while you're giving birth. But the scan isn't a jolly, only you and your bump are required to attend.

Yes exactly as @justmuddlingalong said - while it’s a nice idea to be able to go to scans together, these are truly exceptional circumstances, so particularly if your parents are in a higher risk group, I would choose to go alone and DH/P can look after DD at home. If it’s any consolation I’ve done two pregnancies now and DH has made it to 2 out of about 10 scans because of work - first pregnancy was high risk due to possible unidentified congenital issues, so scans were also quite an anxious time, but you absolutely can do this!!

Advice is no partners at scans, just you and bump

Hi OP,

If it helps, I have never had DH at a scan and he missed 2 of the births too (I had one planned c-section which was re-scheduled and we had nobody to look after DC1 and one EMCS and he didn't get to the hospital in time after collecting the other 2 and getting them to childcare.

It was hard but medically the outcome won't be affected and once I had my babies back home and we were all together again, I couldn't care less.

If you do get to the stage where you have to do the birth alone (and I am not saying you will), hospital staff are used to women who are having to do things on their own and are incredibly supportive. I couldn't have felt more cared for.

Thanks everyone, DH will have to take me to the hospital as I don't drive but he can bring DD with him and wait in the car. I'll go to the scan alone as it seems the safest option for everyone.

@Crackerofdoom I really hope I don't have to go through birth alone but that's very reassuring to hear. We're not due for a while yet so hopefully things will improve by then.