Fed up (weight issue)

[Martha200]

I'm starting to develop a complex.. I am 20 weeks and people are very blunt when they find out what week I am.. had the sure it's not twins comments, oh my aren't you big etc etc comments. I'm not going mad with what I am eating etc, but I'm starting to feel a bit down about this.. it's the way I get told these commments too Anyone else experiencing this? Sounds pathetic on reflection but it's really starting to bug me now

For some reason, some people treat the sight of a pregnant woman as a licence to make totally inappropriate comments about said woman's weight. You'd never walk up to a non-pregnant woman and say "my God - you're really fat" etc..

I've had comments about my weight from the very second I started showing - from people literally forcing food down me as they reckon I'm not big enough, to the twins comments. Anything and everything! Oh and people acting very smug and telling me I'm never going to be slim again!

I really do feel for you - only advice I have is try not to let it get you down, and remember that most people don't have a clue what a 20 week pregnant woman actually looks like! (I certainly didn't - thankfully I have common sense though!)

Martha - people honestly dont realise how insensitive they can be. They will always comment on how you look - they seem to think pregnancy gives them a right too!

IMO, You have two choices - grow a few skins and let the comments roll off you - everyone is different during pregnancy. End of!
Or - you interrupt them, and tell them outright that you find their comments insensitive. Not in a rude way, you can say it in a fairly nice way, but if they are being blunt with you - then be blunt right back. The comments will soon stop - trust me!

It isnt pathetic at all, pregnancy is hard work at the best of times and none of this stuff helps.

I totally agree with other 2 messages. I've had the full range from people in food shops telling me I'm not eating enough to other people telling me I'm enormous and I need to "slow down" (WTF?!). I went out on Saturday and saw some people I hadn't seen for a while and got a whole load of "Oh my God, you're so big!" comments. They were all meant nicely but still, it's not exactly what you want to hear on a night out! I do find most of the stupid comments come from people who haven't had kids and are strangely unaware of how big a baby bump gets.

I had this with DD1.I went from 8stone too 12stone & stopped weighing myself after that.People couldn't wait to point out my size,especially as I'd always been so skinny before.

When I was pregnant with Dd2,I put on barely a stone & had comments about that too.You can't win.Something about being pregnant seems to give other people carte blanche to make comments they'd normally not dream of.

Thanks for your replies

It's funny because this is my second time around. I really don't remember the first time around people being so blunt!! (I am pretty sure I am about the same kind of size I was back then too which is why it baffled me somewhat.)

Anyway, feeling more cheerier now (even as I tuck into a lovely roll FULL of cheese and pickle)

hi martha, i also suffer the same comments as you and even though i am now in my third pregnancy my midwife finally explained it to me..!

we are all built differently! some of us have low rib cages, high pelvis's, slightly different positioned organs... the placenta can lay above, behind, left, right or angled... all of these things effect where baby nestles and grows and make our shapes different. as long as your midwife is happy with your growth then what does anyone else know ay??

you could trying ignoring them or you could be blunt back... next time a stranger makes a comment why not try 'oh no i'm not pregnant!' then see who is embarrassed!

enjoy your pregnancy and ignore others loose lips... look what you're getting out of this! xxx