Due to me MOH a week after birth

[Emma2503]

I broke the news to the bride today, my best friend of 10+ years. The pregnancy was a surprise and totally not planned but it’s happened and unfortunately my due date falls a week before her wedding.
She was fine with it at the time, couldn’t stop smiling, seemed to handle it all well until I’ve just heard that now she’s had time to think about it, she’s upset and confused that I might not even be there.
I feel like a horrible person, it’s broken my heart that I’ve made her feel this way and with the added pressure of hormones, I’m an absolute mess.
Has anyone had or been in similar? Or got any words of advice? I’m too scared to say anything further through fear of upsetting her further.

Let her process the news and she’ll be fine. I’d leave her to think things through for now.

Who knows if the baby is early or late or makes a guest appearance?

She probably is a bit upset that her wedding isn't going to pan out just how she planned, but you haven't timed this intentionally to upset her, and she'll get over it. I think you need to scale back on MOH duties because you just can't predict how you'll cope on the day - you could even be in labour if you go over your dates a bit. Think about how you can still be supportive and excited for her in the run up to her big day. Good luck with your pregnancy!

She needs to realise that other peoples’ lives go on and change even while she’s planning her wedding.

There’s barely a wedding I’ve been to where there wasn’t a pregnant bridesmaid. I was 36 weeks at my sister’s, and she never once moaned or gave out that she had to pay £££ on alterations for my bm dress.

Is the wedding local to you? I would be sceptical that a week post birth that you’d be feeling like putting a formal dress on and committing to a long, tiring event like a wedding, even without the complications of being a bridesmaid.

My best friend was due just before my wedding; she was adamant that she would be there unless she was in hospital whereas I found it easier to make peace with the idea that she wouldn’t be there and see it as a bonus if she was (she was with her tiny baby which was lovely). I accepted that me and my friends are all at a time in our lives where we’re having babies and I wasn’t expecting anyone to plan things around my wedding.