Cheating Fiance

[BumpNum2]

Hey ladies, I’m new to this!
I am 16 weeks pregnant, after 3 miscarriages so as you can imagine I was over the moon. However, I’ve recently found my partner has been seeing escorts and messaging several girls. I don’t know what to do, the obvious thing would be to leave but I’m so scared of going it alone (I also have a 10 year old from previous relationship). And wonderful words of advice??

Personally I would drop-kick him out of the nearest available window. I suppose the question would be, which do you consider worse: the scary idea of going it alone, or the ongoing stress of wondering whether he's staying faithful and invested in your relationship?

Ditch the asshat. You deserve so much better.

Omg op he's not just cheated on you, he's paid someone to cheat on you! Please don't put up with this cheating bastard noone deserves that. What kind of role model will he be for your child? And for me trust is the most important part of a relationship along with love of course and how much does he really love you to pay someone else to pleasure him? I don't mean to upset you but seriously kick him out and find someone worthy of you! Sending hugs and best wishes and I'm sorry you're going through this x

Congratulations on your pregnancy!

I am so sorry that he is behaving this way. You must know really that you need to leave him. He clearly does not love you and he will continue this behaviour if you stay with him - why wouldn’t he?

You deserve to be treated with respect and dignity. He is not doing this and he will no doubt push the boundaries further and further if you allow it.

It is also important to consider your child. He will no doubt treat your baby with the same complete lack of respect and care he is showing you. Does your baby deserve this? No. Your baby also needs to be raised in a home where healthy relationships are modelled so they can, in turn, learn about how they should behave and be treated in return. What sort of message about self respect are you giving your baby if you teach him/her that this type of behaviour is acceptable?

There is also the physical risk he is putting you and baby at. He could be picking up any number of STDs etc from these sex workers and other women, then transferring them to you and your baby. Please get yourself checked ASAP!

I’m sorry if I come across as harsh, but you must know in your heart that this relationship is already over - what you’re really asking is how long you should flog the dead horse for

You deserve better and so does your baby!

He will continue to lie and cheat and you don’t deserve that. Leave him.

Congratulations on your pregnancy

Firstly congratulations on your pregnancy.

I know it's a scary prospect, but you can go it alone. Where do you think this will end if he is cheating and paying escorts? That behaviour won't change (even if he promises that it will) and essentially by staying with him, you will increase your stress, diminish your feelings of self worth and delay the inevitable. This man clearly has no respect for you, for his unborn child nor for your other child.

This is an awful situation for you, and I do appreciate how you must be feeling but drop him, your future self will thank you for it.

Also, I would suggest getting tested for STI's.

I'm sorry this is happening to you, but you are stronger than you think. Take care of yourself.

Hello OP

congrats on your pregnancy! what a blessing.

its a really crap situation your in, everyone saying to leave, is right but its totally down to you. it may not be the decision you want to go down and that's a decision you will need to live with and others will need to respect.

I found out my partner cheated on me last May, he was on an online dating app and messaged a girl saying he was single etc etc and its was actually my FRIEND! he didn't know we were friends and she called me straight away to tell me.

I was devastated and cried beyond belief, we had only just got engaged and we have been together 8 years and not long bought a house together.

I am now pregnant with his baby and we are in a good place.

I chose not to leave him. he told me it was just the once, and I gave him the benefit of the doubt as I had no proof of any other instances. and when I weighed up my life, financially and mentally, I took a view on it and decided to stay. obviously if it ever happens again then 100% were finished.

but you have to do whats best for you, only you are in your shoes and walk your path. There will need to be changes in your relationship if you stay with him, and this will have to come from him.

I confided in my mum for support and didn't tell anyone else due to embarrassment. Do you have anyone you can confide in? it definitely helped me as I didn't even want to be near him at that point and felt so alone and ugly.

I know its really hard to deal with, especially pregnant but you will get through it, with or without him.

im sending you lots of love- hope you are ok xx

Op how are you doing?