When did you tell siblings?

[Nics23]

I’m almost 10 weeks pregnant and we’re planning on telling family and friends who don’t already know at 12 weeks. My partner has a 3 year old son who we have half of the week and we’re not sure of when to tell him about the baby. On the one hand we still feel it’s early to tell a child as there’s so long to wait, and we also want to avoid any drama from his mum, but we also feel it’s not fair everyone else knowing before him and we don’t want him/his mum finding out elsewhere! So, when did you tell siblings there’s a baby on the way?

We were going to tell our daughter when we told everyone at 14 weeks. She’s 5 and she can’t keep a secret!

As it happens there was no heartbeat on the 12 week scan (it had died a few days before). I am so so pleased she didn’t know. I’m not sure I’d tell her until the bump had her asking questions or the 20 week scan next time.

We did want her to be the first to know, but I honestly couldn’t imagine telling her bad news, so this has changed my opinion.

Oh @peanutfoldover I’m so sorry for your loss.

I'm desperate to tell my 3 and 5 year old but will wait to the 12 week scan as they will tell everyone!!!

@peanutfoldover I'n so sorry for you loss x

I waited til Xmas when I was 24 weeks for me 2 at 4 and 5 just because it's such a long wait for them. Once I got to that stage they wanted to count the sleeps and 120 seemed so much less a count down than near 200

I waited until the 12 week scan then showed my 5 year old the scan pic. Only a few people knew before that as it was a high risk pregnancy and I had had a lot of pregnancy loss before her
In fact I kept the pregnancy hidden until I was close to 30 weeks as I was so convinced it would all go wrong. We told the rest of the family around 16 weeks but other than that the only people who knew were the ones dd announced it to!

It’s ok, I’m fine. It’s still a bit raw as only happened last week but every day since I have been grateful that we didn’t tell her.

I just thought it might be useful to hear it from a worse case scenario perspective. I guess some kids would handle bad news ok, but I don’t think ours would have done.

@peanutfoldover absolutely, it’s totally worth considering. Sending hugs.