Feeling emotional deciding between ELCS and VBAC

[Justasconfusedwithnumber2]

I have two days to decide really as I am having a growth scan on Thursday. This is my second baby and my first labour 2 years ago has left me a little anxious to say the least. I had an emcs after 3 days in labour with a back to back baby. I went through water injections, 5 trips to hospital before being admitted as I was so slow to progress. Reached fully dilated, pushing for a well over an hour before they realised my sons head was stuck on my pelvis and his heart rate was dropping at every contraction, so cue red button and emergency rush to surgery. I was in hospital for a week with septicemia, and never felt so weak in all my life, my son lost 13.5% body weight . I now have to decide how to approach this birth. I am 35 weeks. So far my consultant has said its 50-50 choice, I have factors which favour c section e.g. Mental health, and favours against it, e.g I am high risk for blood clotting and suffered a big hemorrhage last time.

Can anyone shed any light how to make this decision? Honestly if I knew I could have a water birth with no complications, irrespective of how long it was, I would do it. I am just terrified of ending up with another emcs and having to spend another week in hospital plus recovery with a toddler at home. My sisters (3) also suffered third degree tears which they are still being treated for a year later which apparently (according to mw) makes me high risk for a natural birth tear if its an hereditary anatomy issue. I've read the advice sheets but of course they are impartial and taking into account my previous experiences I can't reach a decision. That is, unless the baby is predicted to be absolutely massive!

Any advice please?

I'm sorry to hear you are feeling conflicted, either way you get to meet your baby which is amazing, you just want to make it the best experience that it can be and an improvement on last time. I have only had 1 natural birth so I have no experience of a c-section however, my stepmother had 2 planned sections and said they were amazing and her recovery was brilliant, I think a planned one definitely has an impact on the recovery. I would start taking arnica tablets to aid recovery and pack pepper mint tea to help with the post surgery gas.

As for your sisters tear, I am no midwife but I have never heard of that before and don't believe your sisters vagina is a mirror of yours! My mum had a third degree tear with me her last baby and I had nothing but a few grazes, its mostly to do with the position you give birth in and the speed of delivery. You want to avoid being on your back as this puts much more pressure on your perinium than if your on all fours or squating so you are less lightly to tear. You also ideally want a slow delivery of the head to allow the body to time to stretch but this isn't always possible as babies can come very quickly if they want to. Perinium massage will really help to reduce your chance of tearing as will giving birth in water or using a wet flannel over the perinium if you can't have a water birth.

If you decide to have a planned c-section maybe look into a natural c-section to make things a bit closer to a natural birth. I would say right a birth plan for both a natural and a c-section delivery so you have your wishes known. Maybe watch some YouTube videos on both planned c-section and vbacs to help with your decision. Good luck! X

I had to have a planned section with DD as she was footling breach. I found it difficult to come to terms with not having a ‘natural’ birth.

I have to say that my c section was a really positive experience, to the extent that I would very likely actually choose it next time.

Try to work out what YOU want. Unfortunately there seems to be some stigma attached to c sections but I would ignore that and do what’s right for you (and by extension, your baby).

I had an emcs with DS1 and decided to go for an elective section with DS2. For me the main reason behind my decision was that I wanted to avoid another long labour ending in another emergency section. That was my worst case scenario. The only way to guarantee that I avoided an emergency section was to have an elective.

I was quite unwell after my first birth (as was DS1) and we were in hospital for the best part of 2 weeks. I was released 24 hours after DS2 was born and recovered well. We did have to go back into hospital as DS2 was jaundiced but that was nothing to do with the section.

Overall I'm happy with the choice I made, I made plans for the care of DS1 and DH was able to take 4 weeks off work which really helped. I was driving after 3 weeks and probably could have managed at 2 weeks if necessary. Obviously I'll never know if I'd have managed a straightforward VBAC but for me the risk of an outcome worse than an elective just wasn't worth it.

Good luck whatever you decide!

Personally I would go for the Elcs. Then you can plan around a particular date, and you know what to expect. You'd also be able to get some sleep the night before.

I think if I was in your position it would all depend on what they said about how they can manage the blood clotting risk?

Thanks all. I think my husband is 90% convinced elcs is the way to go as you say @GetRid, we can plan much more, and make sure our 2yo is settled etc which will atleast be a weight off my mind. I just can't help thinking I haven't had a successful natural birth which I guess goes back to @INeedNewShoes point about the stigma of c sections. I am also terrified of going joke after a section and having to go back in e.g. If 2yo breaks stitches or I get an infection. I will look at some of the YouTube videos and see how I get on. Thanks again

After a section I think I would want someone else there 24/7 to deal with your 2 year old as much as possible. Obviously you need to be very present and have quality time with your 2 year old but you need someone else to deal with the physical stuff.

After a fortnight my wound was healing nicely.

Just don't mess around with the wound. Run the shower over it, wear enormous knickers that cover it and otherwise ignore it. I took this approach and it healed really quickly.

Friends who 'cleaned' the wound seemed more likely to get infected.