2nd pregnancy different dad

[2ndtimemum2]

Hi all,
I'm new to the site but have found great comfort in the threads. So I had my ds when I was 17. Me and his dad were together for 5 years and we broke up when he was 2. I'm 33 now. In the last 15 years I've gained 2 degrees and a masters. I've travelled to over 26 countries with my son and have a good job. I would consider myself quite successful....

But now I've found out im pregnant by my on/off partner of 4 years. We were together 3 years due to location and other issues we broke up for a year but our paths crossed again a year ago and we got back together for the last year and now I've found out I'm pregnant and all I feel is shame.

Shame of being unmarried. Shame of having 2 kids with 2 different dads. I feel like a failure. My partner and me arent even living together but now that were pregnant were planning on buying a house together in the next 4 months. I just cant seem to shake the Shame of having 2 kids with 2 different dads.

Should mention that ds father is fantastic and fully involved and my partner and ds get on great

Why would you feel shame in the fact your kids having a different dad? I have 2 kids (no3 on way) and my eldest has a different dad... I've never felt shamed about that. It's not asif you are just randomly getting pregnant by different guys.. You was with your ex for a while and you have been with your partner for a while..

Feel proud, not shame - you had a child young, you have done well in life and your having another baby where's the shame your being silly and hard on yourself and congratulations

Hi OP,

the way I see it... the only surefire way of not getting pregnant when you're unmarried is not having sex. The only surefire way of having babies with the same partner is having sex with one person only your entire (fertile) life.
So you've had unmarried sex.
So you've had sex with more than one person in your life.
What's there to be ashamed of?!

Thank you all for your kind messages it just feels so surreal at the moment. I know my mother will be disgusted that I'm not married but it's my life and financially I can afford this baby. I think the guilt she will make me feel is what is getting to me.