Terrifying scan anxiety

[daydreamdaisy]

Just wondering if anyone has been in a similar situation - this is my third pregnancy this year.

The first one at the start of the year ended in a mmc at 11 weeks, picked up after some spotting. Had a d&c and it was the lowest point of our lives.

Then, we had an early loss at 5 weeks in August/September.

The very next cycle, I fell again and am now 11+3 and have my 12 week scan at the end of this week. We did see a heartbeat at 7 weeks and thank god I've had no bleeding this time.

I am so, so terrified about the scan (as is my DH) and have been suffering terrible anxiety that gets worse the nearer it gets. I can barely function now.

Has anyone been through similar and got any advice?

You’re bound to be nervous but upsetting yourself won’t change the outcome and you could be worrying about nothing. You need to think positive and stop filling yourself with stress hormones.

No advice to give but didn't want to read and not send you my thoughts ❤️

It's so scary because it's one of the few things we can't ultimately control in life but please try and take some time to relax, hard I know after what you've been through.

All I can advise is taking each day at a time, focusing on talking to your partner and yourself and do something each day you enjoy.

Can't imagine how hard it must be. Have you tried the Head space app? Or calm?
You can skip the waiting list and have free cbt on the NHS?
Another good thing to Google is "tolerating uncertainty".
Really hope it goes well xx

datayze.com/miscarriage-reassurer.php

I spent most days checking that site ^

Good luck to you! In 2017 I had an early mc in Aug at six weeks, then fell pregnant again straight away however it ended up being a mmc and had a d&c - took a few months off and then fell pregnant again - I was terrified but everything went fine in that pregnancy and I now have a lovely little boy, but I do remember the scan anxiety so sending hugs xx

Thank you all - it's good just to talk to people about it. I will try the recommendations, I used to go to counselling but had to stop as it was too expensive!
I'm not religious at all, but have found myself praying...

I'm in the same boat.. two miscarriages one lost at 12wks (but baby hadn't been growing enough as expected) back in 2017 and one earlier in Feb this year at 6-7weeks. Now I'm pregnant again (11+1 today). I think I've gone mad .. Ive had 7wk, 8wk, 9wk and 10wks scans (some are nhs some are private). This is the week I'm trying to survive without a scan and the 12wk one is booked for Dec 4th that I'm so scared just thinking about it.
I've been going to counselling and using Headspace - doing everything I can to keep me sane..

I'm in a similar situation, I've had a mmc at 11 weeks followed by a Mc at 9 weeks, followed by a stillbirth at 35 weeks, followed by a mmc at 10 weeks and now I'm 7+2. Saw a heartbeat on Saturday and have a scan booked for 6th December which will hopefully reassure me until my 12 week scan, but I am beyond terrified.

Hi all, with you on the scan anxiety, had a chemical pregnancy after my first IVf and now currently 11 weeks after second IVF. Had massive bleed at 5 and half weeks during this pregnancy and lots of spotting which has set my worry for even more. Scan at 5.5 and 6.5 at EPU, scan at clinic at 7.5 and private one at 9 and 10w3. Now holding out till my NHS 12 weeks next Monday. Also had the harmoney test and now panicking the baby won’t be healthy. So much to worry about isn’t there! Trying to say to myself to enjoy pregnancy and not spiral my thoughts. I guess it’s more likely to go well than not! Good luck everyone.

@Ironytheoppositeofwrinkly I’m so sorry, it sounds like you have had a terrible time. It all sounds horrible and I’m so so sorry you had a stillbirth. Have everything crossed for you,

I know how you feel and I'm in the same situation. This is my 3rd pregnancy this year. First MC was in February at 9/10wks, second in May at nearly 7wks, both IVF, both discovered at scans. I have flashbacks of them when I'm looking at the ceiling tiles in utter silence while I wait for the bad news. Even at my last mc scan I was crying before I got onto the bed. I have my first scan next week at 6+4 and I'm preparing for the worst. The anxiety is awful. I can't possibly see how this is going to work out but I'm trying to take one day at a time. I can't help with any advice but just so you know you're not alone.

Didnt want to read and run.
Wishing you all the best for your scan. I know it's easier said than done but try your best to stay calm 🌺

Hey op,

I've just been through similar scanxiety myself. It's so hard to not overthink it and worry. But as pp said worrying doesn't change anything. Try keep yourself busy and do things you enjoy and it will soon be here :)

Thank you all - I can't believe how many people are in a similar situation! I am crossing my fingers so hard for all of us

I had an early MC and then got pregnant again a few months later. I was so confident - 'surely no one's unlucky enough to have two MC in a row!' - but of course, it happens. I ended up MC-ing at 11 weeks and needing a D&C.

Then I got pregnant again and it was awful. DH and I were so terrified of another loss that we basically refused to acknowledge the fact I was pregnant. We didn't talk about it - it was like an awful (vomiting) elephant in the room. I very nearly walked out the waiting room waiting for my 12 week scan as I was so sure it was going to be bad news again. Happily, that pregnancy ended in DC2.

One thing my doctor said to me that really stuck with me was this is a brand new pregnancy, with a brand new egg and a brand new sperm. There is no reason why it will end the same way as previous pregnancies, and that despite previous bad luck, the statistics were still in my favour.

Best of luck x

@PrimeraVez Thank you .. I'm going to try to remind myself this - this is a brand new pregnancy :))

Just an update as I always appreciate ones on threads like this - had our scan and saw a baby kicking and wriggling! Still very nervous but it ended up being a great experience. Crossing my fingers for similar lovely scans for everyone else

@daydreamdaisy that's great news!! Congratulations ☺️ x

@daydreamdaisy what amazing news, I hope you can enjoy it a little bit more each day now :)

Fantastic news OP! I have my 20 week scan next week and am terrified

Yes with my youngest I dreaded any scans and not seeing a heartbeat. I was pregnant after losses at 19, 24 and 29 weeks. I didn’t relax until she was safely in my arms.

I decided only to have one scan at about 18 weeks. I didn’t want to be a weeping wreck each time and couldn’t see any benefits to more frequent scans. It was the looking at monitor and not seeing a heartbeat that was the worst moment each time coupled with the obstetrician telling me it was probably a bad image and not to worry when I knew full well.

The positive is that I did get my beautiful healthy baby, delivered by a good friend, into my husband’s hands initially and then into mine. It was a near perfect, gentle labour and delivery with the large medical team kept outside the delivery room. She’s 21 now and remains an absolute joy.

Here’s hoping your experience is similar and this is a straightforward pregnancy.