Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

Flip

1 2 3

Original poster

Just found out im pregnant and getting a Puppy

74 replies

roundabout123 · 13/11/2019 09:24

Hi all,

I need some advice please. I have just found out I am 5 weeks pregnant with my second child. I also have a little girl who is 2. I have endometriosis and have been trying to conceive for about a year without much luck but yesterday I took a pregnancy test and found out I was pregnant! Woohoo. One thing though, we have placed a deposit on a Golden Retriever Puppy which we are due to pick up at the end of the year, I will be 10 weeks. I would still very much like to go through with it but I don't want to go in to it all with my eyes closed. The baby is due in July, is 7 months a reasonable amount of time to get this Puppy settled before the baby arrives? Fortunately my partner finishes work at 4 so is able to walk the Dog for me during the late stage of my pregnancy and once the baby has arrived but I'm still worried I'm taking too much on my plate? Please can someone advise?

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

DieCryHate · 13/11/2019 10:35

@Neighneigh makes a good point. Fond memories of my summer maternity leave up in the hills with the baby in a carrier and the dog having the time of his life. Also a memory of husband at work, freezing my tits off in February with a three month old baby bundled in the pram while stood in a desolate field in the pouring rain for the dog. Then getting mud and dog poo on the pram wheels before lugging it back in the car.

HildaSnibbs · 13/11/2019 10:39

It's combining pregnancy with a puppy that might be harder than you think - I'm currently 14 weeks, I have hyperemesis, I can't go near a dog (my parents have a golden retriever) because my pregnancy-related hypersensitive sense of smell - I retch. I would not be able to deal with cleaning up any dog mess etc. or even the smell of dog food. And I am absolutely exhausted! All the time... (I have two older kids) Also what if you get SPD later on in pregnancy ? Too many unknowns. I would seriously rethink until maybe this time next year, all being well.

NaturalStudy · 13/11/2019 10:47

The PP that said it is not for the faint of heart is right. I have a two year old dog and a 6 month old baby. The dog is very well behaved but needs about 2 hours of exercise a day, so similar to a Goldie. It's sometimes disheartening once you've got the baby up, changed, dressed, fed, played with, put the washing on, hoovered the house, and just as you want to sit down for a cup of tea you realise you still need to go for an hours walk. It's lovely when it's sunny and warm but as another PP said when your trying to wrestle a baby, a dog that's rolled in shit and a pram that's covered in mud into the car, the novelty wears off. I love my dog but if you do decide to get the puppy, be prepared for hard work!

LinnetBird · 13/11/2019 10:57

Most people expect a boy or a girl, but puppy, that's original

Booboostwo · 13/11/2019 10:59

Congratulations on your pregnancy!

I am as crazy a dog owner as you can find. I have had 7 dogs from puppies since leaving home and have competed in obedience and agility. I currently have 3 dogs.

But even I spaced by puppies around the pregnancy/newborn stage.

Having a puppy is a bit like having a baby, although all the phases are accelerated and not everyone feels a natural bond with their puppy. It is not a good idea to add another possible complication to your life at the moment. Being pregnant with a 2yo at home is already a tough enough situation. To be honest if you were not pregnant I would still recommend you wait until your DC was at least 5yo before taking on a puppy.

Have you considered what will happen if you have any complications that make it difficult for you to deal with a puppy? HG, SPD, bed rest, or just tiredness can be part of pregnancy and might make it very difficult for you to deal with toileting, training classes, socialization and walks. Also you may have a CS or a VB that requires more rest, or a newborn who doesn't sleep, while looking after a 7mo puppy which is still very very young.

I would cancel the puppy now and see if the breeder would be willing to either return the deposit or keep it for another puppy in a few years' time.

raspberryk · 13/11/2019 11:03

I would speak to the breeder but not cancel just yet, ask them if they would be willing to move your deposit to another litter in a few years but I would wait til I'd had a scan to make the final decision.

Span1elsRock · 13/11/2019 11:04

I've got a 1 year old sprocker - she's the most gorgeous dog and I adore her but she's incredibly hard work. She pulls like a train in spite of intensive training, she's very nervous and reactive, and she has chewed through shoes, skirting boards, kick boards, and you can't take your eyes off her for a second.

I think it's cruel to still get a puppy because the baby will be your complete focus. Even with just a 2 year old, I'd say it's not the right time. There is plenty of time in the future when you can give a puppy the time and attention they deserve and have to have.

Congratulations on your pregnancy

Chiltepina · 13/11/2019 11:14

We had a similar scenario in that we had a puppy for two months and then found out that I was pregnant. Our pup is now approaching 6 months and he’s a handful. Not to mention his smell in the first few weeks of pregnancy made me really nauseous and I’m still struggling if he spends too long near me. The biggest issue is his “zoomies” where all training goes out the window and he is uncatachable and doesn’t listen. He also wants to constantly jump on my lap so we are trying our best to train him not too before my bump gets too big. It’s frustrating being so exhausted with the pregnancy and then him needing constant training and attention. I actually get sick of the sound of my own voice saying no! Don’t get me wrong, I love him to bits but if I’d known, I would likely have postponed getting a puppy.

Original poster

roundabout123 · 13/11/2019 11:23

To those of you who have said I shouldn't be getting a Dog already whilst having a 2 year old, please remember we know our own children best and whilst some young children may not be able to adjust well to getting a new animals, others would be perfectly fine especially if they have grown up around animals. (Not being funny but that's not the question I asked!)

Thank you for all the advice! :)

OP posts:

MintyMabel · 13/11/2019 11:26

I had a friend in exactly your situation a couple of years back. The puppy was so demanding, she just couldn't cope. She ended up giving the puppy to her mum.

peachesforfree · 13/11/2019 11:32

I would go for it! I'm sure it will be hard work but you sound like you acknowledge that. I wouldn't judge anyone who had a puppy and was pregnant, I assumed people did that kind of thing all the time - after all it can't be harder than having a full time job and a puppy? Think of it like having twins :-)

XXcstatic · 13/11/2019 11:36

Can you do it? Yes. Should you do it? Probably not.

My worry for you, OP, is that you will end up not enjoying your existing DD, the baby or the puppy, because you'll be so stressed at trying to juggle the needs of all three. It's not just the newborn phase. This time next year, the dog will need to be walked for an hour a day, but your existing DD will be close to outgrowing a buggy. Will you really want to be walking for an hour a day in winter weather with a three year old and a baby?

I totally get your disappointment at having to delay a longed-for dog, but I would wait. Why don't you contact the Cinnamon Trust which arranges dog walkers & fosterers for elderly/sick people? You could do lots of dog walking and fostering before the baby arrives, but without the commitment of your own dog.

Booboostwo · 13/11/2019 11:36

Your 2yo has a lot of experience with large breed puppies in her own home?!

My DCs are 8 and 5yo. They were born in a household with dogs (plus other animals) and have had to share with three puppies added since the birth of DC1. They still feel jealous of the time I spend with the puppy, they are annoyed with the puppy for eating toys, clothes etc., they have to be separated from the puppy when it is biting/scratching/jumping up, and they winge when we have to go on walks.

Booboostwo · 13/11/2019 11:37

peavhesforfree you cannot have a full time job and a puppy.

MustardScreams · 13/11/2019 11:39

Do not do it. The pup will be goi g through its enrage years whilst you have a brand new newborn.

It would be hugely irresponsible of you to get this puppy, and completely unfair on everyone. As much as you think it will be fine there is not a chance you’ll be able to give the puppy, toddler and newborn all the amount of attention they each require.

Wait a few years and get a dog then.

MustardScreams · 13/11/2019 11:40

Christ autocorrect! teenage years

carly2803 · 13/11/2019 11:45

Going to be really honest- dont do it.

I have dogs and they are older, very well behaved etc - i have a baby and its bloody hard work.

The dog needs walking even if its pissing downwith rain, wrap the kids up go out in the rain/cold/ snow etc - regardless.
The dog will poo and weeon the floor, even with a toddler its a nightmare

personally i would speak to the breeder and mabey put your name on one in a couple of years. I love dogs, but would never have a puppy and a baby, itsmadness

Original poster

roundabout123 · 13/11/2019 11:46

@Booboostwo Yes to an extent. We look after my Sister's Newfie 3 days a week in our own home whilst she works.

OP posts:

mclover · 13/11/2019 11:46

Nope and nope! Cruel on the puppy, will end up being given away. For example - when your new baby is crawling and the house is littered with small chewable toys - your poor pup is going to want to play with them all but can't. Will want to play with your crawling baby, but can't. Will end up spending most of the day in its cage. Two friends have given away dogs recently, both sahm.

allthechipsticks · 13/11/2019 11:52

Hi op... I'm another unfortunately saying don't do it!

I have 2 dogs both almost 5, i acquired my second dog at 28 weeks pregnant when they were both 18 months old. My dogs were both out of the puppy stage and relatively well behaved but my god it was hard work! My daughter was born in January so it was walks out in wind, rain and snow for us for the first few months and it was not fun at times but had to be done regardless. Life with a newborn is (as you know) relentless but throwing a 7 month old pup into the mix would make it harder than it needs to be, they turn into little sods around then... obviously everyone and every situation is different. I wouldn't change my dogs for the world, they're quiet in the house, they don't bark and they're good on and off the lead but it takes time and hard work which is always in short supply when newborns are around!

I'd take some time to think about it the possibility of what life with a newborn, toddler and energetic puppy will really be like, warts and all, before committing to anything x

Meltedicicle · 13/11/2019 12:00

Hi OP, many congratulations on your pregnancy. Have you been on to The Doghouse section of mumsnet? There are a few puppy support threads on there which might help.

We are getting a golden in the summer too! I’ve researched it loads because we haven’t owned dogs before and my gut feeling for you is not to do it (sorry!). It sounds like so much work that you’d be better holding off until the children are at school (mine are school age).

I can tell that you all really want the pup and I completely understand but personally, I would enjoy/ survive the baby years first. All the best with whatever you decide

FunOnTheBeach20 · 13/11/2019 12:00

Don’t get the dog. You’ve not got 7 quality months you’ve got 7 months being pregnant. You’re not going to be enthusiastic about clearing up puppy poo and wee.

They are big, boisterous dogs. They need far more attention than a daily walk. Will be impossible to manage with a new born and toddler without doing one a disservice.

My dog was 18m when the baby arrived, went for a smaller breed than I had previously. I needed families help initially.

Original poster

roundabout123 · 13/11/2019 12:02

Ok thanks everyone. Think as sad as it is we are not going to go ahead with the Puppy. She is only 4 weeks old at the moment so better she finds a new home to go to now rather than later down the line.

By the way just to add if I was to have gotten the Dog I wouldn't have rehomed her. I would have pushed on through and persevered but even so I think we will have to come back to this again in a year or two as sad as it is. Thanks for those of you who posted positive yet constructive advice. x

OP posts:

MustardScreams · 13/11/2019 12:02

Also a pup can’t just have a walk at 4pm, they’ll need to go out for a mooch in the day time. Plus lots and lots of training throughout the day. They tend to forget everything around the age yours will be if you get it, and if you don’t keep on top of training you’ll end up with a hideously behaved adult.

How are you going to train a dog whilst giving your toddler enough attention, tending to a screaming baby, sorting out food for you all. Then take the dog out in the day in the wet/cold with a newborn that hasn’t slept all night and a toddler that is regressing because of all the changes?

This is a very likely situation, I don’t know why you’d want any of that?

MustardScreams · 13/11/2019 12:03

Ah cross post op. Glad you made that decision. It is sad but it’s definitely for the best for you all. Once baby is older you can start looking again and it’ll be much, much easier.

Flip

1 2 3

Swipe left for the next trending thread