Pregnant with 3 month old baby

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My baby is 16 weeks old and I have just found out I am 4 weeks pregnant.
We always planned to have two so my partner is delighted and I am too- but am starting to completely panic also.
Am I insane? Will this be unfair on my 3 month old? Has anyone been in a similar position and can give me any advice/ make me feel better??
Thanks x

First, congratulations!

I’ve never been in your situation.

I suppose it won’t be easy to start with, pregnancy and small baby, than 2 baby’s together to care for. Don’t beat yourself up thou, I hope you have some family and friends nearby that can help you from time to time. With the years I think it might get easier, thinking also your children will be so close in age and have a good bond between them and having always a friend to play with.

I've not got such a small age gap between my children but I can only inageing it is going to be very hard during pregnancy with a tiny baby and then again once new baby is born but as PP has said the close age gap as they grow older will be nice. If you have lots of support around you and you and oh are happy about it then that's all that matters and you will cope :) x

I’m in the same boat.. if number two comes on time there’s two days short of the year between them. The one thing that’s really stuck out that’s been said to me is “they’ll never know anything different” so unlike a 5year gap the eldest won’t remember being an only child or having mum/dad solo.

They’ll be hard work, but so could one baby. And they hopefully get out of the harder phases closer together 😂. I might even manage one school year 😂

Congratulations! How utterly terrifying I'm sure but there are positives to all family choices. Firstly, people will make all kinds of assumptions and comments - rest assured they do this for single children, multiple pregnancies, big age gaps and small. It seems the only socially acceptable age gap is 2 years. That's the age gap I'll have and I wish it were 1year instead! By two DD is jumping on me like a trampoline, tantrumming hard and generally making life difficult. At one she was a tiny angel (comparatively): they can walk, but not fast, they have no comprehension of being able to demand things like cake and Peter rabbit, they're still little enough to not know you're all theirs and fascinated by tiny babies without being big enough to pick them up and throw them (genuine concern I have). When you get to having a two year old -nightmare- the second one will already be a bit more independent! It will be hard, but all parenting is hard, and your children will have the benefit of being close in age which might prove easier for shared interests!

This has happened to quite a few of my friends over the years. I’ve only got a 17 month gap. It’ll be fine, hard work but fine. Almost like having twins and tons of people get through that. Good routine for eldest, double buggy and getting them napping at similar times.
No jealousy from my eldest, liked the same things all the time. Did all same clubs and classes and got along great.
Congratulations

Congratulations!!!
The babies really do come when they want to don't they 🤣😂
I have a friend in a similar position- it wasn't easy for her but then at least once you're out of the newborn/nappy phase you can just put it behind you (unless you want 3?!)

10.5 months between my two!
And it's been tough, but I only think that's because my daughter was hospitalised for jaundice at 9 days old. Then she had a feeding tube for 3 months due to bottle aversion, reflux and cmpa. But she never cries unless she's hungry bless her!
Watching my son give her a cuddle is so damn cute, and I'm glad they are growing up so close together :)

Of course it's shit, but then it gets better.
(I bloody hope it does anyway!)

Thanks so much for all your replies everyone! I guess it will be a bit crazy for the next few years but lots of fun! Thanks again x

Not quite as close as yours but there is 15 months between mine.

Very hard work when they were little but once we got past the first 2 or 3 years, it is brilliant because they are both at similar ages for activities. You aren't stuck with 2 widely different abilities and the older they get the closer in age they appear.

You may even have them in the same school year.

I've been in this situation and like you I panicked but there was no need to, my boys are so close and if they are away from each other they pine for each other that's how close they are xx

Hi OP I'm in the same boat... I'm 34 weeks pregnant today and my boys will be 12 months apart... due on my LOs 1st birthday so I understand the worries
The only thing I'm struggling with at the minute is carrying a 26lb lump of a 11 month old on my hip and I have really bad SPD so my hips/pelvis are really sore but I do have a good family network that help out if I need it
But picking him up really hurts
I understand your worries though but once you start feeling your baby move & wiggle the worries aren't as strong, and plus my 11 month old puts his head on my belly now and it's the cutest thing ever.... just watch out for them kicking you in the stomach when doing nappy changes I get kicked all the time 🤭
But a massive congratulations all babies are blessings x
Sorry about the rambling I've got nursery rhymes playing down one ear and some kind of strange baby singing/screeching down the other 👍

15 month gap between mine. It’s hard work but it’s getting easier (or I’m just getting better at multitasking 😂). I’m also assuming that it will be easier to do things as a family as they get older as their needs will be the same. Congratulations.

Hi everyone just jumping back into this thread and asking for some advice from those who have been / are in a similar position.
I only get statutory maternity pay from my employer and planned to take a year off. This worked out as statutory maternity until March then have a few weeks unpaid then “return to work”, take all the holiday which I have accrued (will be a years worth as our holiday year runs June to June) then go back to work at the beginning of July.
As my new baby is due in July I just naively thought I could then start maternity again but having looked into it a bit more when you count back 15 weeks from your due date I will have just finished getting statutory maternity pay so I don’t think I will be earning enough to qualify for SMP.
Does anyone have any experience in this area?
Thanks! X

Congratulations
I’m 16 weeks and 2 days pregnant with twins and i have a daughter who will be 6 months on the 28th of this month. There will be about 11 months between the twins and my first, even less if the twins come early.