Would I be foolish to request an elective C section?

[tobebebebe]

My last labour was traumatic.

Pregnancy had been perfect and healthy all along, got to 42 weeks and went in to be induced, they decided to break my waters first as they were 'bulging' 3h6mins later baby was born.

I started requesting epidural/pain relief 10 mins after they'd broken my waters as it felt like things were ramping up already - midwife kept saying 'oh its only early labour, we'll get you up and about for a bite to eat in a minute' then baby went into distress and heart rate dripped - cue room full of people.

Consultant examined me and I was 8cm already (roughly 1h after waters broken) - finally given g&a, clip put on babys head to monitor. Baby goes into distress again and midwives try to force me onto my feet - I can't stand and almost fall over. Then I'm forced to lay on my side which is excruciating for some reason. Next minute I'm signing emergency C section forms. Then babys heartrate settles again and they decide forceps is better option.

Spinal block, forceps, tearing, episiotomy, etc. 'Pushing' stage 1h. Baby born healthy and beautiful 7lb 3oz.

I was so scared the whole time, and in immense pain. Recovery has been hard also (I realise its never gonna be easy, but this was something else) Do you think it would be reasonable for me to request a C section this time round?

You can request a c-section for any reason but the real problem in your last labour was letting you get to 42 weeks. Talk to your consultant and see what they say - you may have your 2nd earlier and a water birth at 40 weeks is often a lot better than a c-section / induction

Of course it’s reasonable to ask and it’s reasonable to ask even for someone who hasn’t gone through that. I’d recommend asking for a debrief as well, just so that you can be fully informed of what happened last time and why your wishes were ignored.

As awful as this sounds, I think you will be listened to far more now you’ve had a baby. My pregnancies have consisted of the same semi patronising question of “first baby?” at some point of another and when I have said “no, second/third” the huge difference in how my thoughts on what were happening were respected and acted upon was astounding.

It's your body. Your pregnancy. Your choice of course you can request it :) they want you to be as relaxed as possibly during birth (not that its relaxing lol) and if you are going to feel better having a c-section then they cant really ignore your requests x

Thanks everyone.

@OnlineShopping Yes, I completely got that the first time round, I look young for my age anyway and always seem to get spoken down to but the whole "First baby?" patronising look was so frustrating.

Do it. I have this time for my second after awful first birth. I did get some resistance from the consultant but once I said ‘I’ve made my decision’ there was no more debate from him x

@tobebebe I had a similar first birth experience to you.

In my second pregnancy I became hugely anxious about the birth. I requested an elective when I was about 32 weeks and it was one of the best decisions I've ever made.

I can't advise much on the process because I gave birth in Australia but I had one on the public health care system and nobody argued with me at all.

I had a horrific first birth I knew I wanted a section second time round after what happened the first time my consultant was great and agreed straight away I'm currently 17 weeks with dc 3 and will have another elective c section the difference was unbelievable so calm and controlled best thing I done .

I'm requesting one ✋first pregnancy ! I don't care ! You're well within your rights. A planned c section is one of the safest ways to give birth. Don't let the brain washed preachers get to you. Do what's right for you.

I had a similar first birth to you in terms of forceps, bad tear, induced, hideous labour. I distinctly remember telling husband afterwards that there was no way I could ever do it again & I could only have a c section (which is obviously far from the easy option). I was so exhausted & in so much pain.

Fast forward just over a year & we were expecting our second. This time I did more research on how to help myself in labour - first time I went in blind & was totally led by the midwives & then doctors. I did a birth preparation workshop which focused on breathing & positions.

When it came it, it never particularly crossed my mind to ask for a c section but I think that's because I really wanted a water birth but was also worried I'd cope with a toddler for 6 weeks post c section.

I ended up having the water birth i wanted & it was a COMPLETELY different experience to first time.

It's so hard to know how it will go for you & it's a really personal decision what you chose to do but don't rule anything in or out until you have to. Can you speak to your midwife & discuss your concerns & options?

I've requested one and it's my first baby. In my trust they make you meet with the psychology team for some reason. The psychology team were lovely. I then met with a consultant who did run through the risks (I guess it would be irresponsible of them not to), but made them sound much less frightening than my own research had, and said words to the effect of "Well yes, of course, it's your decision."

I'd been braced for having to argue my case and it completely took the wind out of my sails

My DD had a traumatic first birth which ended with an emergency c section. With her second DC she opted for an elective c section and was so pleased she did. The whole process was calm and straightforward and she recovered very quickly.

@Tableclothing I also thought it would be a much more difficult and judgemental process to get an elective c section for the first baby. But so far it's been really straightforward and they've said it's my choice. I'm aware of the risks etc. I haven't had mine booked in yet, but the consultant assured me I would be able to get it. All the best to you and I hope all goes well and you recover quickly.

Your second birth may be completely different.

For first birth I was induced at 42 weeks. The pessaries did nothing so I ended up with the drip. I had an epidural, episiotomy, forceps and a lot of stitches. Baby weighed 8Ib 12 oz and spent the next 3 months in PICU.

My second birth was spontaneous at 41 weeks. I had no pain relief at all. I gave birth standing up. The midwife caught the baby and stitched up a small tear. Baby weighed 9Ib 8 oz and fed within moments of being born.

Your body, your decision
You will probably be referred to a senior midwife and/or a consultant who will try to put you off as there are more risks with a section.
They will explain all the risks but ultimately the decision is yours.
I had an emergency section with my first and would do it again in a heartbeat.
I was calm and relaxed (probably to do with the drugs!) and recovery was very easy for me.
Good luck

@tobebebebe I suggest you start with asking is there is a birth reflections or debriefing service in your hospital. You can ring the antenatal clinic or your community midwife to find out, or there may be information on the hospital's website.
Ask for a consultation to go through what happened and to work out if things being done differently would help before you decide what you want/need this time.
I would strongly suggest that you try to get a continuity of care midwife so that you can really get to know them & you'll then know that they have your back & will advocate for you. You really want one who provides care before and at the birth. All hospitals in the UK are trying to provide continuity, but it is a long and challenging path to achieve that and it may not yet be available for you. Where abouts are you? Possibly worth considering an independent midwife to support you, or perhaps a doula. Happy to discuss further if it might help.

I’m similar to you, had a traumatic first birth that resulted in being prepped for Emergency section but they managed to get my boy out with ventouse, forceps and episiotomy. He was then really poorly and was on the neonatal unit for a month (not related to the birth). I think I was shell shocked for around 6 months after and didn’t realise how much it had affected me until becoming pregnant again. I’m now 21 weeks and have requested a consultant appointment which I’ve got at 28 weeks to request elective C section by maternal choice, which is in the NHS NICE guidelines. I am expecting a bit of a fight as I’ve heard my Trust generally don’t offer them. I will go prepared with all my arguments and I’m quite prepared to be seen by the perinatal mental health team if needs be - won’t be necessary though as I’m a psychologist myself so I know what trauma is!!! One thing to bear in mind is that the risk stats for C sections usually include emergency sections which, as far as I have heard, are a totally different experience to elective sections.

If you want a C section, you absolutely should push for it. However, I had a very traumatic first labour with episiotomy and very medicalised birth. I wanted a c section the second time because my stitches didn't heal and it affected my sex life. But a midwife persuaded me to try an more natural birthing route and when it came to it, everything went perfectly and even the birth of the baby seemed to sort out my botched episiotomy stitches. It depends on things like your age too.

I decided to go for an elective with my first and really regret it. You can only have so many and be safe due to inner scaring. The limit is 4 and that’s pushing it.
Baby wasn’t ready even though I was near 40 weeks. He needed oxygen for his lungs. Recovery went fine but I have had surgery before and know what it feels like. Caring for your child when you have a section is near impossible alone and my husband had to do all overnight changes burping and all that for me as it was hard to get in and out of bed. I feel like I missed that bonding time.

Natural was much better. I didn’t even know I was in labor thinking it must hurt more than this. I was 8cm when I went to hospital lol! Mommy and baby time was enjoyable instead of Pained. I healed MUCH faster. Feeling myself after just a week instead of like two months. My first baby had horrid reflux which is very common with scections and actually messes up their gut microbes for a good while which we needed probiotics For a good year and such to correct it.
A baby gets their gut microbes (responsible for all digestion for the rest of his life) from the mothers birthing canal (so mamas take your probiotics and eat healthy to set your kids up for life) when having a natural birth, as when you have a csection the first microbes your child is exposed to are a sterile environment and so your baby’s extra job is holding onto whatever microbes he comes in contact with via the nurses doctors family visitors etc

I can only comment on my own experience, but I had what I deem to be a somewhat traumatic first birth, which ended in a C section after me screaming the hospital down for hours with labour pains.

I found the C section absolutely amazing. I was so chuffed to be out of pain, and I healed incredibly quickly. Within 4 days I was walking around town, baby in tow. I had no problems lifting her at all and none of the issues that seem to be on google when you look up a C section.

For me it was an incredibly positive experience compared to a horrific attempt at a natural birth.