I have a 4 month baby girl, I have been taking care of her solo with no financial help from the biological father. Which is fine as I want no ties to him and no contact due to his psychological abuse before, during and after my pregnancy. We were "friend" lovers before I fell pregnant and travelling together, I came back to England and found I was pregnant. He's American and lives in Puerto Rico for tax reasons.
He told me he was going to try and get full custody of my unborn baby and was threatening me with lawyers and courts and pushing me to get a paternity test throughout my pregnancy, when he told me he would set me up for life if I terminated the baby, I told him to forget about us and I didn't want to hear from him again.
The next I heard from him was a week before I was due to give birth with an emotionally loaded email telling me he should of just been a friend and supportive and he wanted to be at the birth and there for us, he said he'd been doing some personal development and felt like a new man.
He came to England and made it on the day she was born. A day or two after he started to mess with me again, mind games, pushing paternity and talking to me about co-parenting. Which I thought was out of the question at this point as I didn't trust him and was seeing if I could. We got out of hospital and stayed with him in his air bnb, he booked flights for his mother to come over from America to come spend time with her new "grandbaby", while my head was still spinning.
While staying with him he told us he wanted us to move to PR with him and he would get me a nanny or helper. I told him we wouldnt be moving anywhere at this point. I asked him if he would like to help out he could help with child support as I wouldn't be working for awhile as I'd be taking care of the baby and not getting maternity pay as I'd been self employed.
He didn't like this and became very intimidating and hostile and calling me names.
Me and the baby left the air bnb that day, he stayed in England one more week and we spent a day with him so he could have time with me and the baby.
When he left England I breathed a big sigh of relief..
His mother came a few weeks later and she has the same entitled ungracious way and put photos of my baby on facebook after I told her the distress it had caused when he had done the same thing, with no consent from me, no tag and no mention of the mother. She decided to do it anyway with no regard for the state of affairs or my feelings. She said she had "grandma bragging rights" and didn't know what my problem was.
I have decided to go no contact with him and not have them in my baby's life as he is highly exploitive, manipulative and abusive and tries to mess with my head over email and when he is here, throwing his money around, making big money deals, flying friends and himself back and forth to Ibiza for the month but denying me any child support unless I get a paternity test.
I don't think he will take this well, I wouldn't allow him to see us this week, he flew in and I told him we wouldnt be seeing him.
He paid for a private investigator company to search for us and he also went to my parents house to try get my address.
I'm wondering what else I can do to protect myself and my daughter from him, though I don't think he would hurt her, I don't want him in her life because of what I've had to deal with this last year.