Should I just tell my mum?

[Legomanships]

Hi,

I am eight weeks pregnant with my first. I have known for a couple of weeks but my H and I decided we should wait the standard 12 weeks before telling close friends and family.

I have been having quite a hard time this week with morning sickness that lasts all day, and I am also just turning to google for answers on what is and isn’t normal...which I think is driving my husband a bit crazy.

The reason we thought we should wait is so other people aren’t also sort of stressed while we wait to get through the first trimester, but I feel a bit at sea with everything and don’t know if I should maybe just tell my mum so she can give me a steer.

Would it be wrong to tell her and not the other parents? Is it just adding someone else to the stress?

Sorry to be a bit of a dither, google brought up lots of miscarriage stories when I asked when people tell, and to be honest that’s just made me more stressed now 😬

Miscarriages happen weather you tell or not, and if it does happen you may well want her support (I'm sure it won't)

Just tell her and have a good winge about your sickness

I think it would be fine to confide in your mum and not other parents - sounds like you need her support right now.

My husband said it was fine with me telling her, I just feel a bit dithery! I’m an idiot. I also have my first doctors appointment next week but not until Friday, I was going to try and wait for that to be done, but I’m just a bit at sixes and sevens. I feel like I’m usually more rational 🤦🏻‍♀️

Can your mum keep a secret? mine broadcasts like a radio If so, go for it. The first trimester can be really lonely.

You might find this website helpful:
datayze.com/miscarriage-reassurer.php

I told my mum both times. When I had my MC with my first pregnancy I was so grateful for her support. When things went well this time (35 weeks at the moment) it was lovely being able to share it with her.

Just phoned her, she said she already knew because my boobs were huge...ok thanks mum 😂

Big congratulations op! Glad you have your mums support and well she guessed anyway so all good there x x

We need to stop this "standard twelve weeks" nonsense, it adds to the stigma of pregnancy loss. If a woman miscarries, that's when loved ones will want to support, no one should be expected to hide their pregnancy in case something bad happens.

I'm really pleased you told your mum Lego, and hope everything goes well for you.

She also said stay off the internet and it’s your news to tell whenever and however you want, so I think there is some wisdom there in not necessarily buying into the 12 week thing

The more people who know, the more who can offer support if anything were to happen.
I think the 12 week thing is horrible.
Tell your mum, she's probably guessed already 😊

Aw I'm glad.

Thanks so much for the extra little shove I needed. She said I should tell my dad too because she won’t be able to keep it a secret from him. I’m fine with him knowing too so will call him later when he’s back home