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Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

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Original poster

Cot in the same room

41 replies

Newmum2b78 · 09/10/2019 15:23

Hi ladies,

Trying to get prepared for when I come home with our baby. C section scheduled for Friday !!

My question is, does the crib have to be by your bed, or can it be a bit further away like against the wall ? My Dh is reluctant to kick the dog out of the room and I'm worried she knocks it over. She has no manners at all !!!
I can see his point in that we don't want to instigate jealousy.

I realise after a c section it would be easier for me next to the bed, but I just worry about potential hazzards. He doesn't seem to see them !!

Thanks ladies

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

FraterculaArctica · 09/10/2019 19:47

I have no idea about how to deal with the dog sorry but wanted to warn you that you may need to adjust your other expectations after a C section. You will likely need your DP in the room with you for at least the first week to lift the baby out of the cot and help you with feeding and changing. Also babies often wake up again as soon as you put them down in cot which is exhausting - you can be trying to resettle them for hours. Are you going to manage this post CS with the cot away from the bed? Again if you want to go down this route you will need your DP there to help till you are a bit more recovered. Have you thought about a cosleeper/sidecar cot (CS or not I would do this). I wish someone had warned me about this with my first, especially when I ended up with an EMCS - I couldn't believe how hard the nights were at first. Do factor this in as well as all the considerations regarding the dog.

FenellaMaxwell · 09/10/2019 19:49

Also, if your dog is already prone to anxiety, please do spare a thought for how disturbed she will be if you are constantly getting up and back into bed again, there’s a load of screaming, and the entire night is unsettled.

Csleeptime · 09/10/2019 19:57

You need to move the dog now, agree pet gate and door open so the dog can see you sounds a good start.

Please don't risk a pet with your newborn unsupervised which is what sleeping is. It only takes once for your life to be over....read some stories, there are horrifying ones.

OhAlice · 09/10/2019 19:59

the dog is the biggest hazard here. in the bedroom with a newborn? hell no

Csleeptime · 09/10/2019 19:59

Posted too soon. I'm another cat lover and ours had to go out for 2 months each baby to adjust to baby cries and smells. We didnt rralise at first, all good, baby cried and cat went full force to attack him and then me when I picked up the baby. It was scary and suprising for a loving cat. Also jumped in the pram if you weren't watching and would happily smother baby.

OhAlice · 09/10/2019 20:03

get DH to sleep in another room with her. your baby is more important now. what if baby gets cold because dog needs to cool down? your husband needs his head checked if he thinks that's ok

Lunafortheloveogod · 09/10/2019 20:05

If the dog absolutely must be in the room or she’ll destroy the house what about a crate? She’ll be able to see you but not jump or trod on your c section scar.

Having the cot next to you is a million times easier for the sake of oops dummy in or hand on them to settle them down rather than getting fully out of bed and back in.

You’ll also have to watch how cold the room is too.. I doubt it’ll be that cold with all of you but obviously your under a big duvet, dogs under all her fur but baby’s under a thin layer and might be closer to the window depending on lay outs.

Really start getting the dog used to being elsewhere, I know it’s difficult with separation anxiety but safe spaces for you baby and the dog are important.

Teddybear45 · 09/10/2019 20:13

Honestly if the dog can’t cope in another room then you need to take her to the shelter / rehome her - unless of course you want to be headline news in the DM after the dog attacks your baby. Dogs with issues and newborns don’t mix.

WombatStewForTea · 09/10/2019 20:19

OP hasn't said anything to suggest the dog is aggressive in any way. Just that she's worried about it knocking into the cot because it's big and has separation anxiety which is not agression. It's seriously misunderstood.
OP if you're worried get a dog trainer in to show you how to manage her move out of the bedroom

Original poster

Newmum2b78 · 09/10/2019 20:20

I tried to say to him we need to get her settled out of the bedroom months ago. It will be easier on her to do it before baby arrives. He is just so laid back and won't listen. Currently sat in silence after yet another argument about her.
I've said I am not putting our baby at risk and if he would rather sleep in another room with his dog then crack on !
She never gets on the bed I don't allow her. She sleeps alongside him on the floor. I brush her daily because I can't stand the hair.
I'm just hoping as I've said she gets knocked off her princess pedestal and we resolve things.

OP posts:

user1493413286 · 09/10/2019 20:20

I’d move the dog out before baby arrives otherwise the dog will directly associate that with the baby. We made any changes we needed to for our cats before our baby arrived and the noise and new person was already enough to unsettle them without their routine and environment changing

SleepingStandingUp · 09/10/2019 20:28

I really hope he sees sense and wants to make things easier for me not harder he needs to understand this isn't even about you (sorry OP) but the baby. If he isn't prepared to put his biological child ahead of his fur princess you have bigger issues than where to put the cot.
And if Princess has anxiety, a baby crying in and off all night isn't going to help her

moobar · 09/10/2019 21:45

You need to get serious on this one OP.

What do you think a health visitor or midwife would say about a large dog with separation anxiety being left unsupervised with a newborn. That's the reality. You cannot possibly have the dog in the bedroom and both be awake? Or one awake??

I understand being a dog lover, as I said earlier I have three and adore them. But this is a newborn baby.

Agree with suggestions re large crate or at worst a second pen.

Either that or you take baby and sleep elsewhere, it's that serious.

moobar · 09/10/2019 21:45

Secure pen

20viona · 09/10/2019 21:48

We have our snuz at the foot of the bed and it works well.

The dog has to get out of the bedroom!!

Blueeyedblondie · 10/10/2019 07:39

I'm a FTM with a 1 year old cocker spaniel, we fitted Stair gates to the bedroom doors about a month ago so the dog could get used to not coming in the bedrooms. He was never allowed in them anyway but he used to try and sneak through if the door was open. The Stair gates mean he can still see me yet knows the boundaries of where he is allowed and where he is not. He sleeps in a crate in the lounge at night so thats not an issue but I'd suggest having dog free zones in the house so you can have a guaranteed 'safe space' (the bedroom is ideal) with the baby.
As much as I love my pup, he's still an animal and they're unpredictable, no matter how well trained or well I think I know him

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