Scared to death about being a single mummy at 20

[amb38]

Hi guys, I just wanted abit of advice. I'm 21 weeks pregnant and have decided to split with my daughters dad because of the way he's treat me during my pregnancy with lies, immaturity and selfishness etc. His mum has also been making my life a living hell too. I'm so stressed with the pair of them after threatening to take me to court on numerous occasions before I was even 20 weeks pregnant. I have never ever denied them access from my daughter when she is born, I would want her dad to be involved.

I'm 20 years old and 21 weeks pregnant (unplanned) I had been with me ex for 3 years on and off and I seriously never thought it would have come to this. I have family around me that will help me but I'm absolutely prettified of everything! When my daughters born I really don't want her to be taken away from me too soon to stay at her dads house but if I was to tell him or his mam this they would come back to me and say I'm using her as a weapon see you in court! I hope things settle before she is born, I just don't know how I'm going to cope as a young single mum 😭

Has anyone else been through this before and managed to get through it? He's already demanded savings we had saved for her transferred back in his bank. His mum has threatened me and gave me really nasty harassment over text messages. I don't know if I'm comfortable sending my baby to his house (he lives with his mum) alone.

Hi op.
I am nearly 33 weeks and going through pregnancy alone too, the only difference is my child's father has completely walked away and doesn't want any involvement.

It is good you have family support around you, that is a big plus.

Don't worry about the courts taking your child away, I can't see them doing that unless very good reason. It sounds to me like your ex and his mother are just bullies and trying to bully you. Please keep all the messages of abuse and harrassment they have sent to you, inform your midwife also as they have seen a lot of this before and can advise you on what to do.

I would block his mother, she has no say in this. If she continues then inform the police - she is relying (and so is he) that you will bow over with their threats and do as they say, that is not on.

Also don't be afraid to reach out to other organisations such as gingerbread house and woman's aid either.

Is advise you to breastfed as that way baby has to stay with you xx

Is there any reason why youve started the same thread 3 times now?

From reading your previous threads I think the issue is more his mother than him. I think one of the issues your breaking up, mainly the you thinking he was too ill to be near you, was a tad unreasonable.

You've been advised to consider the breastfeeding and you have already said you arent putting him on the birth certificate, which I personally feel is a little childish but each to their own.

If you aren't going to work this out as adults maybe you need to start thinking about court orders for financial support and access.

Also, I sort of think if you are saying things like he won't be on the birth certificate etc, that implies you'll be hesitant to any visitation. In that case I can understand his anger and his requesting the savings back.

Maybe he wants to save in a separate account now, as things don't some amicable.