Finding out gender at 20 week scan

[eks3]

Hi, I had my 20 week scan yesterday. The lady asked me if I already knew the gender and I said I had a 16 week scan and they told me I was having a girl but I would like this confirmed. She advised me at the end of the scan that all my notes would be put on a system which I have access to and I was fine to go home and look at that. I thought nothing of it and tried to access at around 12 today and it still wasn't updated so I called woman's health. They advised they had spoken to the lady who carried out my scan and she said baby was in an awkward position, so she got all of her measurements but couldn't tell me the gender, I wouldn't be allowed to go back because she got her measurements yesterday. Has anyone else had this annoying experience?

I feel a little bit disheartened as because I paid for my 16 week scan they told me just to go off that? I'm just concerned incase it isn't correct and I buy everything girly.

Surely if I hadn't had an early scan they would of had to tell me or ask me to go back? Tia xx

I'm afraid the 20 week scan is a medical scan to check for abnormalities and how baby is growing etc. they dont have an obligation to invite you back for gender at all and I'd be very very surprised if they did based on the fact they've got the measurements they feel they need. sorry probs not what you wanted to hear. I know they're not cheap but you can always go for another private scan for gender if you are feeling unsure about the earlier one x

What PP said. It's an anomaly scan, not a sexing scan. They are under no obligation to tell you the sex of the baby (and some NHS trusts will not do it even if the baby is in the correct position). So they wouldn't have invited you back, to confirm baby's sex, regardless of whether you paid for a private sexing scan or not.

If you are in doubt about the sex from your private scan them you will need to book another.

It’s not a gender scan, it’s an anomaly scan, so all you can do is pay for another if you need reassurance about the sex of the baby. Appreciate how annoying it must be but, looking at the bigger picture, it sounds like you have a healthy child on the way. You could always keep receipts if you’re buying clothes, or have another scan around 30 weeks for a different experience. We opted for 3D with my first and I could tell she was the image of her dad - it was quite a nice experience and very reassuring after reduced movements. Wishing you all the best.

I had a 16 week scan and they told me I was having a girl

I'm not hugely knowledgeable on this stuff, but if they said at 16 weeks that you were having a girl then aren't they almost certain to be right? Did they tell you how certain they were at the time?

NHS sonographers won't call you back for a rescan for the babies sex. It is a scan to check for abnormalities. They don't have to tell you the sex at all. Unless there is an abnormality with the genitals then it's all rather irrelevant really.

When you feel disheartened about them not confirming the sex, just remember some women come out of those scans knowing their baby is incompatible with life.

Yeah, as above - NHS is not obliged to tell you if it's a boy or a girl, and they certainly wouldn't have called you back for another scan JUST to find out if it's a boy or a girl, regardless of you having had the 16-week private scan or not.

I think you should be glad that the NHS sonographer was honest - I'd much rather prefer someone saying "Sorry, the baby was in an awkward position, I couldn't tell if it had boy or girl bits" than just making a guess!

I was told at 20-week scan that it's a girl. Due to anomaly I had another (NHS) scan a week later and was told it's a boy there!

My NHS hospital has a policy not to tell you the sex at the 20 week scan. If you want to know you have to book a private scan somewhere else. It's frustrating but a good policy I think as the anomaly scan at 20 weeks is just to look at the health and people make it way too much about finding out the sex.
If you were told at 16 weeks you have a high chance of that being right!

It’s not just a NHS rule - most private providers won’t call you back if they can’t find the gender either. That’s why they call it in the anomoly scan - to cover their backs. Most private providers do have a cheaper scan later on in pregnancy that can guarantee gender and they will make you return until they can see it - take a look at your local providers.

I hope they wouldn’t ask you back given stretched resource.

But just go with 16 week, buy white baby gros

As others have said the purpose of the 20 week scan is not to tell you the sex of the baby and they certainly won't be wasting precious NHS resources bringing you in for another scan unless there is a medical need to.

I can see it must be frustrating but as someone who had bad news at 20 week scan that meant the pregnancy didn’t continue its best to focus on it as an anomaly scan, as that’s what it is.
As other posters have said, even if you hadn’t paid for the private scan the outcome of this one would have been the same, they wouldn’t haven invited you back to confirm the sex.
Perhaps another private scan is the way to go if you really want to be sure - although I would go with what they said at 16 personally.
Hope you have a healthy pregnancy.

They really are under no obligation to tell you and will definitely only tell you if they are 100% sure as otherwise they'd be leaving themselves open for someone suing them for telling them the wrong gender. With all my anomaly scans I have been asked if I would like to know the sex if they are able to see it clearly so they never set an expectation. As someone who has had bad news at a 20 week scan, and I was very nervous beforehand, it baffles me how people only see the scan as a gender scan when it's really so much more important than that.

Surely if I hadn't had an early scan they would of had to tell me or ask me to go back?
Don’t be so ridiculous the sex of your baby is not important.
And as for being concerned you may buy “ girly” clothes in error. Quite frankly you need to grow up and be thankful you have a healthy baby with absolutely nothing to be concerned about!

This scan is an anomaly scan, surely knowing your baby is healthy and growing well is more important than its sex?

If you want confirmation pay for a private scan.

Seeing what sex the baby is can only be done in the right position for seeing the sex of the genitalia.

Baby can't be forced into any given position, and its an anomoly scan.

I don't think you have any right to demand the nhs look for and tell you your baby's sex, they are about making sure you and baby are well and flagging up problems. The sex doesn't affect that unless you have a genetic disorder that expresses in one sex or other.

Whatever your baby's sex, enjoy your pregnancy, the birth and having your new baby.

Anyway, is gendering a sex a thing anymore? Just buy clothes, I thought the girly and the boy stuff, as in gender stereotypes was a dying thing!

We need to keep moving away from unhelpful gender stereotypes and tell our girls and boys they achieve anything and wear whatever they want, not conform to silly unhelpful and unhealthy gender stereotypes.

It wouldn't matter even if you hadn't had a scan at 16 weeks. It's an anomaly scan, if they can tell you the sex that just happens to be a bonus. If they can't, then that really is the end of it.

Book another scan elsewhere. The NHS scan is to check the health of your baby so no they won’t get you back to check the sex. 🙄

I’d be confident with your 16 week scan.. when you are paying for a specific gender scan, they should have spent a while checking & told you if they were uncertain. My local private clinic check, send you for a walk if they can’t tell and back the same day and if they still can’t see, you get to go back another day,

What makes you think they might have been unsure?

I do understand wanting to know, people are very harsh but the NHS aren’t there for that unfortunately. If you really don’t feel sure from 16 weeks, it’ll have to be another private scan to confirm. Maybe pick up mostly gender neutral stuff for now & hang on for a 28 week bonding scan. You can see bambino’s little face really nicely at 28 weeks and they’ll double check for you!

Yes, unisex stuff is the way to go, it doesn't matter unless you're keen on gender stereotyping your baby.

This sort of stuff surely should be less and less important now right? Aren't we trying to get away from harmful stereotypes?

So no matter what sex, baby, child, adult can wear what they like?

Baby sexing surely just reinforces that it even matters, doesn't it

The NHS 20 week scan is absolutely not to look at sex that is just a bonus that they can tell you if they can see. It is to check your baby is looking healthy. While it may be a bit annoying if they can’t say please just be grateful your baby is healthy. At my 20 week scan they found something unusual and it was terrifying luckily they think it’s nothing to worry about after a lot of extra monitoring but some people aren’t so lucky.

I've found none of my NHS scans have been published on my app.

I had a sex scan at 16 weeks too as I didn't want the anomaly scan to be about anything else. The sonographer at 20 weeks asked if I knew the sex but still confirmed it.

During the scan did the sonographer talk you through everything that was being checked?
Mines talked me through each part she was checking & that everything was fine. At the end confirmed she agreed with the sex. I'm sure if she was unable to see the sex she would've let me know during the appointment.

Sonographers who don't confirm sex usually have clear signs up in the room. It's not been that the sonographers been reluctant to tell you, just that the baby's position prevented it. It is disappointing as you could've been told this then & there but I'm sure the 16 week scan is accurate & you could get another done before you start buying colours.