I’m 35 + 2 weeks pregnant and feeling really anxious about early labour…

[BeckyHS]

I’m 35 + 2 weeks pregnant and feeling really anxious about going into early labour, not being ready and just everything in general.

I’ve been getting some aches and pains I’m worried about but not sure if I’m just being paranoid or if it’s something I should be concerned about .
I’ve been getting more lower back pain and hip pain than usual which I put down to doing lots of walking and standing at the weekend. I’ve also been getting pain in my lower abdomen - kind of of crampy. This is more when I need to go to the loo. Now this might be TMI (sorry!) but I’ve been having more frequent bowel movements. I’ve always had frequent and large bowel movements, even in pregnancy, but this feels different. I’ve mentioned it to my midwife before and she said it’s because there’s less room in there. I am eating quite big portions still (piggy 😂). So I’m not sure if it’s just me being paranoid.
Did anyone have any signs that turned out to be labour when they thought it was nothing?

I’m also worried because I’m not finishing work until I’m 37 + 5 weeks pregnant. Because I’m a teacher I need to work up to half term so I can try and get as much full pay as possible. Baby is due the first day back after half term so my maternity pay won’t start until then. I don’t have a class but I have loads of other work to do which I’m worried I won’t get finished which will make things harder for some of my colleagues. I’m also finding it really hard covering lots of different classes. I find some days I barely have time for a break all day and it’s tiring me out. Whenever I mention being tired, people just say yes you will feel tired. I feel like I can’t refuse to do the cover though as that’s my assigned role and I already feel like a massive inconvenience by just being pregnant. I didn’t go in today because my back and hips are really bad but mostly it was because I feel so anxious and so tired - I barely slept last night. I feel so guilty for not going in though.

We were also meant to have work starting on our bathroom replacement this week but the plumber is delayed and can’t start until next Monday. Now I’m panicking that’s too late and I’ll have a baby and we won’t even have a bathroom. My partner says it’ll be ok and we’ll just deal with whatever comes our way. But it’s making me so anxious.

I just wish I knew when the baby will come. I really feel so out of control and overwhelmed at the moment. I feel like I want to check every single thing out with the midwife but it’s just not feasible. I also feel unprepared and so I wake up in the middle of the night worrying and making to do lists.

Sorry that’s a massive rant. I just feel I can’t tell anyone and if I do, people say it’s just normal. Which I know it is but it just feels rubbish!

With my DS1 I was sure I had signs of early labour from about 35/36 weeks. Achy and period type pains occasional tightening all sorts of things

He turned up full 2 weeks late after induction! It's quite normal at this stage to worry about that sort of thing but most of the time it's unlikely to be early labour. Try relax best you can and not worry too much. You'll be seeing your midwife regularly now? (I'm 34 weeks and seeing her every 2 weeks from this week) so you can always chat to her or call your DSU / triage if your not sure.

Hi @BeckyHS

Didn't want to read and run.
I am 33+1 on Baby #1 at the moment so am not far behind you. At the moment I am planning on finishing work at 39+4.

I am sure what you are feeling is normal but am also sure you are probably as ready as you can be. Your body has been getting ready for baby's arrival for 35 weeks now and know's exactly what it needs to do.

All your aches and pains sound normal, and I am definitely starting to feel some of that too.

Regarding work - you can only do what you can do. Your colleagues will know that you have done all you can to give them the best possible handover. If baby come's early, and your not finished - it doesn't matter. Someone else will pick it up, they will manage and it won't be your worry.

Hope you feel a bit better soon! Is there anything labour related you feel specifically concerned or worried about a minute?

K x

I'm the same, I'm only 31 weeks but it is worrying me. My reasons are that my other two children were born at 38 and 39 weeks so I've never gone to my due date anyway and I'm finishing work at 38 weeks.

My main concern is that my labours were both fast so what if something happens unexpectedly and there is nobody to watch my other kids and I end up having it in the bathroom or something?!

Anyway, the thing is, these fears are reasonable and rational, the same as yours, but most people don't go into pre-term labour even if they feel like they will. Most people make it to hospital and most births (not mine admittedly) take a while. Try not to worry about things you can't control just now, trust me it will be good practice for parenting!!

Oh and I got my whole downstairs decorated the day before DS2 arrived? He was kind enough to wait and I hope yours is too!

@Mintypea5 Thanks, that is reassuring! I really feel I need to get to 40 weeks with everything that needs doing still. Everyone in my family is notoriously late for everything so I'm hoping she is too!

@NewMumToB3 Thanks for the reply. I'm sure it is all normal but as it's my first too I feel like I'm heading into the great unknown with a hospital bag and some baby sleepsuits!

Labour wise I'm just worried about a. it being too hard and b. something going wrong. Baby was breech but I had a scan last week and now she's head down and isn't too small so that's been a relief as I've been worrying about having a tiny breech baby and having to have a cesarean early on.

@mistermagpie I bet you have a contingency plan in place for this one though, especially with two other children. Hope it all goes well! Ha I know someone who decided to clear their entire garage out and went into labour four hours later. I'm hoping they'll wait until the bathroom is finished. If the bathroom does go ahead, I'm going to be standing cracking the whip at the plumbers!!

@BeckyHS I definitely know that feeling!

I've been reading a couple of really good books and actually feel really relaxed and positive about labour now. (Don't get me wrong - I know that it may all come to nothing / go to pot when Labour Day actually arrives!)

Have you tried any positive birth affirmations or reading about mindfulness and hypnobirthing? I know those things aren't for everyone.

I actually also really like "Emma Willis Delivering Babies" on the TV - I've seen lots of complicated births on there where things have not gone to plan but they've all ended up positive and the midwife's are incredible. I've been really reassured by that. Hugely contrasts to one born every minute which I just find traumatic! There are some really nice positive birth videos / stories on YouTube too x