Midwife appointment at my house and never met her

[Dominos21]

So I had my first midwife appointment a few days ago, but she isn’t my assigned midwife. As the women I would’ve been seeing had her day off. I’ve then got an email confirming my midwife will be coming to my house to complete paperwork in 2 weeks. I find it a bit strange letting someone I don’t know and never met into my home. I thought I would’ve met her already ? Has anyone else had this problem ?

So what are you worried about exactly..? She's just coming to have a chat, takes about an hour tops and she's gone.

Just as an FYI, day after you're home from hospital you'll have midwives then healthvisitors you've never met either! Lucky you got an email, they just use to turn up to see me on a day, then after DC was born I had HV at 9.30am in the morning!

It's how they do it, for a period of time it will be in hospital or your clinic/surgery and then they might do home visits again towards the end.

@Dominos21 it would be lovely to see a set midwife each time, but unfortunately in most trust areas it just doesn't happen.
My area was supposed to have a policy whereby you saw a maximum of 3 different midwives. I think the idea was that as the team are community based and carry out clinics at GP surgeries, they would each have a set surgery where they held their clinic therefore you would see the same few people.
This pregnancy I have seen a different one each time, which was the same as my last experience prior to the new idea. Even my last appointment, where the midwife I had seen 4 weeks before was actually there and seeing people, I was called through to the one I had never met.
They tend to all be very nice though. They are used to visiting all sorts of different women in their homes and other settings. They should be well equipped to pick up your signals for what type of person you are and be able to support you accordingly.

It is a bit of a wake up call for a lot of first time mums, but it's good practice for all the strangers who will be part of this journey.

I get it. I'm a bit funny about people coming to my house, it's my safe place. I probably prefer the 'hands up vagina' tbh.
You'll have very few midwife apps, if your pregnancy is straightforward. There will be the health visitors after the birth as well. Try to remember that these home visit appointments are actually meant to make you feel more at ease and for your convenience, rather than a chance to corner you or have a good nosey round. You could always arrange the visit to be at a relative's or reply 'it's ok I can drop in at the centre as I'm out of the house a lot anyway' if it's really bothering you

Thanks for making me lol wilmalovescake.
A top answer.

You can always keep a baseball bat near you if you think she’s dodgy.

In the latter stages of my second pregnancy, I needed checks every day at home. I got whichever midwife that was on home visits that day. On the plus side I had met the whole team before my homebirth (except the student).

What might make you feel better is, all midwives should have some form of ID, and there is a rota. so if you are paranoid, like me, which gets worse in pregnancy, you can check ID and better than that, ring up and check the name of who is coming.
They try and make it so you see the same person, but it doesnt happen. With my last, i saw the same midwife all the way through, til i gave birth! Never saw her again, different midwife delivered baby, and had a different midwife for every check after that lol!

If it helps they do show you their I'd when they arrive, and mine used to call yo let me know when they would arrive. That was after the birth though. I attended hospital antenatal every two weeks throughout due to complications af a huge hospital. I remember only seeing the same midwife twice but always saw the same doctors ( I was consultant led). Diring the birth of my first child - not a c section I had 10 people in the room and 6 midwives, 2 doctors and a medical student throughout the 8 hour labour. I had never seen any of them before.

With shift patterns in huge hospitals in reality it's very hard to time midwife appointments and certainly the birth itself to coincide.
Even in the 10 days post birth I saw the same midwife only twice. In London, certainly, they are dealing with such a huge number of people they're spread thinly so take patients off the top of the pile so to speak.

In general you're unlikely to see them too often in a normal pregnancy and it's probably better for you to pop to hospital for the appointments.

Op what is it exactly that you're worried she'll do or will happen?

Can you ask someone else to be there with you, she should also show you ID when you open the door

I get it. I'm a bit funny about people coming to my house, it's my safe place. I probably prefer the 'hands up vagina' tbh.

Me too to be honest. Maybe because I had years of fertility treatments before I was pregnant so a lot of people (think 80 or so) saw my vag during all kinds of checks, tests and treatments. My home is my safe space. I also think that things could be organised nicer if there would have been enough professionals. Ah well, most of us have to reset our boundaries during pregnancy. OP, you'll be ok, it's just one of those not-so- fun things that need to be done.

Honestly don’t worry - they aren’t coming round to check you have a soup tureen and matching doilies! It’s fairly standard not to have a named midwife and the HV will also visit you at home. It’s to check you have a suitable environment for a baby, not to judge your choice of wallpaper.

Yanbu and you should have the same midwife throughout - though it rarely happens.

Having strange people in your home is one of the big changes of parenthood - midwives, health visitors, teachers, parents of other babies.

I found it a bit of a shock but it’s the ‘new normal’ for you now