Hormones and doubt

[CattyP89]

Still struggling. Did anyone else have a horrible feeling in their stomach at the start of their pregnancy (I’m 7 weeks) that they couldn’t do this? I’m stressing my whole life will change my partner and I will never have the same relationship as before that I won’t be any good as a mum. I thought I’d love the idea and at first I did but now I just cry I can’t eat I feel sick and nervous and very unsure. The baby will be 24/7 how do women manage this and get their head around it.

Yup! Completely planned and wanted pregnancy, freaked right out, DH was my absolute rock, kept reassuring me that we could do this that we will be fine. I'm now 30 weeks and looking forward to meeting our little one.

I think everyone feels this way. It’s a huge adjustment and you’re right life will change irretrievably so you are just getting psyched up. Don’t underestimate the effect of the hormones. I’ve cried at every thing I’ve watched on TV this week! At least you’re realistic. Otherwise you’d get quite a shock. And I know what you mean when you wonder how people do it. I only have one and she rules our lives. How do people have three or four or five?! They just cope. And you will too. The first trimester is tough because you feel like shit but you don’t feel really pregnant. It will get better.

Definitely went through that @CattyP89 despite wanting to be pregnant so badly. When little one comes it can be hard but I found I felt like he's always been here so even the hard bit just felt normal if that makes sense?

It's totally normal to get cold feel. It's also true that your life will change, but that's not a negative thing, it's just that pregnancy and parenting is scary and the idea takes some getting used to.

I have two children and I'm pregnant with my third, I still worry about being a crap mum, it's totally normal.

You're also really early so it's all a bit abstract, but you've got plenty of time to prepare and get your head around it. Don't worry.

Thanks for all your reply’s. I was starting to stress thinking I couldn’t cope being so emotional and tired all the time I couldn’t handle this all 9 months so I hope it gets better

I’d be lost without women like yourselves to talk to so I’m very grateful pregnancy just isn’t what i thought it would be

You're spot on about pregnancy being different to what you imagined. Some people do have very straight forward "easy" pregnancies. Some people don't but even the people that skate probably surprised by what they experience. I for example have SPD/PGP I had no idea that was even a thing when I fell pregnant. It's totally taken the joy right out of a lot of my pregnancy but 9 months isn't that long in the grand scheme of things and it'll all be worth it in the end. The thing that makes me happy is imagining all the nice things we can do together, there will be really hard parts and I'd be naive to think there won't be but there will be good bits too.

Oh god yes! I remember I had imagined my reaction to a positive pregnancy test so many times and how I’d announce it. In the end, I called my mom before my husband and cried down the phone: ‘what on Earth have I done, I can’t be a mother!’ 😂 I didn’t read any books and was never maternal so didn’t think I could do it, but it’s true what they say: you really do adapt and get on with it!

I have had 2 (and three quarters!) easy and straightforward pregnancies, so have been very very lucky. But it still isn't what I imagined and mentally I really struggle with pregnancy. I don't enjoy it at all and am very anxious a lot of the time. Pregnancy is hard, and even though it's worth it it can still feel like a slog.