Pregnant again with 7 month old- what do I do?

[oldyellowbricks]

Hello

I’ve just found out that I’m pregnant again but my little one is only 7 months old and I don’t know what to do!

My OH & I have written a pros and cons list and it looks doable(ish) on paper but my 7 month old is quite a handful- don’t get me wrong, I absolutely love him to bits but he isn’t a great sleeper, day or night and I find myself crying at least twice a week when my OH is at work.

My main concern is the one on one time I will lose with my current little one and how being distracted with another could impact him. The last thing I’d want is to end up resenting the new baby :( I just don’t know if I’ve got it in me emotionally.

The flip side would be ending the pregnancy which also seems out of the question as I don’t think I’ve got the heart to do it.

Has anyone else been through this? Would appreciate your input, thank you.

My eldest was 3 months old when I fell pregnant with my 2nd. I had exactly the same worries.
It was hard, I forgot what sleep was like and had pnd. But.... it was worth it. They are very close, I was already in baby mode so it was easier than years later when I had another and had to go back to the whole baby thing!
I had to develop a good routine just to get through the day but that helped all of us.
I was most shocked at how much love I had for them!
Good luck in whatever you decide but it is doable!

My DD is 19 weeks pg & my DGS only turned 1 last week. There will only be 17 months between them. It was a shock at first, but they're happy

14 months between my DDs with a husband who works long hours (he went back 2 days after DD2 was born) and no family around. It was HARD and relentless in the beginning but now I love it!! They're still very little but it gets easier every day.

My DD will be 18/19 months old when baby 2 arrives. I do feel a bit daunted about having two under two and know it will be hard work but I'm also excited.

A small age gap will hopefully mean they will be little playmates and enjoy the same sort of outings, I know some of my friends with age gaps of even 3 years struggle to find activities or days out that both kids are equally enthusiastic about.

I'm also really grateful for being able to spend extra time at home with DD. Second maternity leave is extra time to spend with her too not just baby 😊

The only part I'm a little concerned about is the expense of nursery for both simultaneously. When I go back to work we will have about 9 months to go before DD is old enough to qualify for any of the free hours funding that kicks in from the September after they turn 3 so that is going to hit us a little financially but it will only be temporary and will just budget around it.

Only you know what is best for your family, best of luck with your decision.

Thank you all so much for your positive words, it’s really comforting hearing from others who are in the same boat!

I have 14 months between dd1 and 2.
I remember feeling guilty about having dd2, like it was a betrayal of how much I loved her (I know ...sounds stupid, but I was a hormonal mess). However it turned out to be the best thing ever, despite the fucking relentless nappy changing, dd1 not even walking when dd2 was born and mad chaos of it all. They are 13 and 12 now and I think even they would admit they are lucky to have each other and be so close in age (inbetween eye rolls and "yeah yeah mum, stop being cringe")

16 months between my 2 DS, didn't have the heart to terminate as we were sure to want 2 kids anyway.
It was super hard I'm not going to lie and we almost separated in the process, but then neither of my kids ever slept well...
It started to get better when DS2 turned 2 and now they're 3 and 4,5 it's awesome, they're very close, keep each other company and I don't have to plan for separate activities. Same clothing size too. DH and I now feel life can throw anything at us and we'll be ready and strong together.
Unexpected consequence: if we had a bigger age gap I think we would have stopped at 2 but I feel I missed the baby experience with DS2 so I want to have it with a 3rd... crazy

I've got 17 months between my two youngest. It was hard, mostly as the younger one was extremely demanding, never slept and I had pnd. But I got through it.
I do have feelings of guilt that I didn't get as much time with the older of the two, but they do play lovely together now and depend on each other a lot.
It's never easy or ideal whatever age gap you have for different reasons.

19 month gap here, you'll feel guilty and miss your 1 on 1 time with dc1 but dc1 will be too young to hold a grudge it can be brutal at times (mine weren't a fan of sleeping) but you get through and when they're a few years older they're into the same activities, play with each others friends at playdates, play together and look out for each other at school.

Mine are 6&5 and it's great, I'm so glad I got all the sleepless nights out of the way at one time and their bond is fab. Honestly wouldn't do it any different if I did it over! Good luck