Any experience of V birth of a big baby after a 3b year?

[Babynumber2dueNov]

Hi All,

After a disastrous meeting with a consultant, I was told they do not intervene for big babies (I’m measuring 5 weeks ahead! 33w measuring 38w!) and that due to me being epileptic (no seizures for 7 years) they would ‘NEVER recommend a c section’. I was induced horribly with my first, water broke day one, the next day started induction which took 3 days of labour 2.5 hours of pushing and resulted in a 3b tear.
After the consultant making me feel mental for considering ECS, does anyone have any experience of a birth after a bad tear? I’m realising how terrified I am. I literally remember being on the operating table and feeling the darkness defend as I lost almost 3l of blood. I don’t want to feel that again.
Ugh, getting teary writing that!
Hoping to hear something positive!

Obviously the title should be 3b TEAR not year, but writing this in the dark after a week of no sleep with the 2yo! Send help!

I had a horrific tear with first 8lb4 ventouse, long episiotomy with second 10lb back to back unturned forceps. Incontinent for 6m.

Third child fell out, not even a graze 10lb.

Long episiotomy with first. (Community midwife looked when we were home and exclaimed "good grief that's a lot of stitches!") Second baby 11lb 7oz born in the pool, still needed stitches but was right as rain after a week.

Forgot to say...4hr stitch job for first and second, all the way up. So yes, you can have an ok birth after.

Interested to hear stories on this. I had a 3b tear last time and am due my second in the next few weeks.
Midwives have been positive about not tearing this time and I fortunately had no issues last time and healed well within around 6 weeks.

My hospitals clinical guidance says that after a 3b tear there is a 30% risk of faecal incontinence if you have another vaginal birth. I also had various tests a year after my hear that recommended a csection (anal ultrasound, various nerve tests and stuff, not the most pleasant experience). I wanted to have a vaginal birth until I read about the faecal incontinence and ended up crying to the consultant at 38w6d asking what she'd do. She was really uncomfortable said she couldn't say but eventually said yes she'd have a section.

I didn't enjoy it and I'm sad I'll never have a nice natural birth (like you my first was a induction) but I'm glad to have protected the repair of my 3b tear. I'm surprised they won't consider a section. My understanding is that if a consultant isn't prepared to advise a section they should refer you to one who will?

God, that’s terrifying! But also helpful! I’m waiting to speak to the consultant midwife, will call again tomorrow as I just don’t know what to do or who to turn to really! Thanks everyone

I didn't have a 3rd degree tear, I had a second degree tear with my first baby, she was 6lbs 4oz.

My second baby weighed 9lbs 6oz and was born without so much as a graze. So baby size doesn't always indicate the amount of damage they do on the way out!

They were both induced, born with me on my back as I was being monitored, so the birth situations were similar too for them both.