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Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

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Original poster

Health visitor - can I say no?

20 replies

Andersonx3 · 03/09/2019 15:44

Just that really. Had a letter today with a date & time for my health visitor to pop round prior to me having baby. It's in my work hours and is rather vague as to how long she will be here and what time she will arrive. Can anyone tell me what their health visitor did at this appointment and how long it took? It currently seems like hassle, especially as up until then I have a pregnancy related appointment either with a specialist or my MW every week meaning more time away from work which I really don't want as I would like to start handing over ASAP before all of my work runs into when I will be leaving (I'm a project coordinator so planning projects past due date already).

Thanks!

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

Mrsaverage1 · 03/09/2019 16:01

They take a lot of info about you, who lives in the house with you etc. From what I remember it took about 40 minutes but you can call and ask them to do it another day. Especially if you are already taking other time off. Mine also gave me a ridiculously long slot of something like 11am - 3pm so couldn't possibly of worked around it but when I called she agreed to come after 4pm which I could accommodate with work.

Whatsnewpussyhat · 03/09/2019 16:04

Just ring up and tell them you are at work so appointment is no use.

Mintypea5 · 03/09/2019 16:44

Took less than an hour for us. In my trust it's just a. Chase for them to ask some stuff about you ( who lives there and stuff about life style like smoking / drinking) also gives you a chance to meet your HV in advance before baby is here instead of just being handed over to some random person when you're discharged from midwife after baby.

Mine was lovely and I really liked that I already felt comfortable with her when I was discharged to the HV care

Zakidoodles23 · 03/09/2019 16:49

When the hv came to me she only stayed 10 minutes. Gave me the red book and asked a few questions about feeding etc. Although as I have a 4 year old she said it should have just been a phone call as they are really short staffed.

mistermagpie · 03/09/2019 17:20

You can say no to the whole thing if you want. I opted out with my second child because of some terrible 'care' from the HV with my first.

If it's just that the appointment doesn't suit then tell them that, they can't force you to meet them when it doesn't suit you,

RatherBeRiding · 03/09/2019 17:23

Of course you can say no - it's not mandatory especially if you have to take time off work.

Some HVs really are worth their weight in gold. Others - not so much. I was really lucky with mine and she supported me through some incredibly tough post-natal baby health issues but I know others have had mediocre HV input at best.

Always worth getting to know yours just in case, but it is entirely up to you.

Crystal87 · 03/09/2019 17:24

I've never had this with any of my four. It was a new thing when I was having my last child but she never turned up. I wouldn't opt out of the whole thing however as it gives them reason for them to think you're hiding something. But I'm sure one appointment wouldn't be an issue.

AnneLovesGilbert · 03/09/2019 17:25

I had DD in March and here you don’t get a visit before the birth so it can’t be that important.

Original poster

Andersonx3 · 03/09/2019 17:25

Mixed opinions so far then! I'll have a chat with DH this evening and see how we feel about it thanks everyone!

OP posts:

mistermagpie · 03/09/2019 17:28

I opted out of the whole thing and they know exactly why (I made a complaint about it). I'm not bothered if they think I'm hiding anything, what are they going to do about it?

Jollitwiglet · 03/09/2019 17:34

You're well within your rights to either opt out altogether or to rearrange the appointment if you so wish.

With my first it was just a quick introduction and I was given loads of information leaflets about local support services. Can't have been there for more than 20 minutes

KTCluck · 03/09/2019 17:37

I reorganised mine for when I’d just started maternity leave. It was nice to meet her and meant I felt a bit more comfortable when she popped in post birth. The appointment was about half an hour I think, and was just a chat about what support I had, what was available locally once the baby was here etc. Mine was fantastic in helping with breastfeeding problems in the early days, so for me it was definitely worth engaging. You might not need her, or might find she’s not much use, but if you can arrange a convenient appointment it might be worth it. You can definitely tell her that appointment isn’t convenient though, and you are perfectly entitled to say you don’t think you need it.

DowntonCrabby · 03/09/2019 17:40

We never had an antenatal appointment.

If you're happy to engage and it’s just that it's inconvenient I’d call and say you’ll happily see them once your care is handed over from the community MW postnatally but you’re too busy before baby arrives.

Tigerwhocamefortea · 03/09/2019 17:41

I declined my HV pre birth visit with DD.

I had been given all the information I needed by my midwife and didn’t feel the HV could add anything useful before baby was born.

Bol87 · 03/09/2019 18:04

I enjoyed my visit from a lovely HV, who I then never saw again. I had terrible service from the HV service in my area (run by a private company). No-one came to see me post birth, when I got around to querying why they’d accidentally closed my file. They were so short staffed, they then sent a HV who worked for a totally different area and knew nothing about services local to me. She also refused to weigh my baby and said I’d have to go to a local clinic - she didn’t know where. She even admitted she had scales in her car but they were heavy My daughter hadn’t been weighed since 7 days old & she was now 4.5 weeks..!

I was also forgotten for the one year assessment, had to chase 6 times & eventually had it at 17 months!

She’s now 27 months & I've heard nothing about her two year review but I’m not bothering doing anything about it..

Can’t say I hold out much hope with my second baby. I might opt out..

PerspicaciaTick · 03/09/2019 18:11

The idea is that you meet your HV and start to build a relationship with them before the baby arrives. So when they rock up 10 days postpartum, you aren't inviting in a complete stranger while feeling vulnerable and emotional.
So, as it is for you benefit not theirs, of course you can decline.

Kdubs1981 · 03/09/2019 18:55

Just say you're busy at work. This will be fine. You could rearrange for when you start mat leave if you want, but you don't need to. Like other said, it was quite nice to meet them and see a face before baby came

BarleyG · 03/09/2019 19:01

I’m half tempted to opt out completely too. My experience of health visitors is that they are rude, judgemental and generally just there to make you feel like you’re doing everything wrong

supskaur92 · 03/09/2019 19:04

It's a generic talk about arrangements however I called mine and told her I was at work and couldn't make it and they conducted it over the phone as I had no concerns I wanted to share about other family members in the home

TartanCurtains1 · 03/09/2019 19:29

Mine was less than an hour but I could arrange it at a time which suited. You could have it after mat leave starts.

Was fairly useful, quite a bit of info etc, I think they also want to suss you out to see if you're "risky" in any way.

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