Why don't I feel anything

[csmw]

I'm currently around 10 1/2 weeks pregnant after a miscarriage in May and I don't feel attached to this baby and I feel awful about it. I don't understand why I'm not feeling attached or excited, as I have before. My DH and I have a 9mth DD together, who we adore and from the moment we were pregnant with her we were so excited and happy. This time although we want another baby I just feel a little sad.
Is this normal to feel this way, this early in pregnancy?

Sorry to hear about your miscarriage.

Could it be that you’re worried about something going wrong again and so you’re subconsciously not letting yourself get your hopes up just yet? I’m sure when baby comes along you will love her/him as much as you do your DD!

@SilentAlarm Thank you it was a really hard time especially as it happened 5 weeks before our wedding.

Maybe that's what it is, I am really nervous about losing this baby too every twinge has got my nerves on edge.

Totally normal - I was exactly the same in fact probably said those exact words. Don’t give yourself a hard time about it, I’m 23 weeks now and only just feeling attached. I think it’s normal as it’s so special with your first as it’s your first - the next one is special, but different somehow.

You might also feel guilty for having another baby because your DD will have to share you, thats how iv felt each time. I wasnt even sure i wanted this baby until i had a big bleed at 18 weeks and it made me realise how much i did want it x

@Gettingonabitnow Thank you, it's just so weird DD is my 2nd I also have an 18 year old so there is a huge gap. I was told I'd have trouble conceiving naturally after him so DD was a bit of a miracle baby to us. x

@ohdearymemumof3 This baby is definitely wanted :) me and DH both have young asult children so we wanted another for her to grow up with. I do feel some guilt though shes still so young and I'm so tired and nauseous all the time I feel like I'm letting her down :(

I feel exactly the same!

I have a 2 year old Daughter and I am 10 weeks pregnant.

I have recently had 2 miscarriages, but felt so excited to be pregnant both of those times. This time round I was so petrified that something was going to go wrong, that I think you sort of stop yourself from getting attached in case you get hurt again.

Maybe it might change after 12 week scan?

I felt exactly the same, our first pregnancy ended in miscarriage. I'm not 27 weeks pregnant and I have definitely stayed detached to try and limit how hurt I would be when it happened again, every mile stone has let me break down that barrier a little but I wouldn't say I'm excited or in love yet.

@Nikster11 @smartcarnotsosmartdriver

So sorry for your losses.

Its comforting to hear others have felt the same, I was starting to worry I'd never get that bond with this one that I have with my other children. Hopefully the scan helps just have to wait 3 weeks x