Anyone tried to conceive WHILE saving for a house deposit?

[kylieeee]

Hey everyone, I’m sorry for the essay I’m about to fire up, but I need some reassurance and hopefully some advice?!

I’m 24 and lucky enough to be engaged to my best friend, we’ve been together for 6 years and we’re really happy. We live together in an annexe on the side of his parents house at the moment while we save to buy our own home, hopefully early next year. We both work full time and earn fairly good money, we’ve travelled the world together from an African Safari to Jamaica, Mexico, Paris, Dublin, and so many more. We’ve made some amazing memories together during our relationship and we’re very lucky to have done what we have, and work hard for what we have, so feeling really ready to settle down.

From the very beginning of our relationship, dating back to about 18, I have known that my purpose in life is to be a mummy and there’s nobody else I’d want to build a family with than my partner. Its always been in the back of my mind, but over the last couple of years I have gone baby MAD. I honestly think about having a baby day in, day out and nothing else. I don’t help myself because I watch back to back one born, teen mum uk etc haha, guilty pleasures! But it makes me feel like I’m missing out and I generally feel quite sad about it. Don’t quote me when it does happen, but I’m even excited to be in labour myself to feel what it’s like and experience my new born baby being put on my chest for the first time. I just can’t think of anything more fulfilling in life.

After several conversations with my other half over the past year or so, we finally decided this evening that we are going to try from October. You can imagine my beaming smile!  this gives us plenty more time to save, and at the moment we have around £17k saved up, which will be built on while we try to conceive (who knows how long it'll take!) and I'll still be working through my 9 month pregnancy.

Does anyone have any experience of saving whilst trying to conceive? It's a little bit scary not having our own place but we'll definitely be there by early next year and ready to move so long as we can find somewhere.

Basically, someone just tell me it's a good idea! 

It put a lot of pressure on us finding a place when I fell pregnant
It was stressful losing out on much loved houses and for some to fall through

In the end we moved in just the week before baby arrived after hardly seeing DH for the 6 months before as he was getting house sorted

That all seems a little doom and gloom - I wouldn’t have changed it though
We were unlucky in missing out on houses and things were quite competitive in the local housing market back then

If ready for a child I wouldn’t put off TTC

I am currently 38 weeks with my first DC and we bought our first house when I was about 14 weeks, moved in at 6 months pregnant. It wasn’t planned this way and we have been VERY lucky!! We borrowed some money from my parents for a deposit and then by some miracle loved the first house we found and had our offer accepted just two days after viewing. The owners moved into rental accommodation so there was no chain and little stress with the contract exchange but even that most straightforward of moves took 4 months from offer to moving in.

What I’m trying to say is it’s 100% possible but difficult. Things really fell into place for my husband and I but it could have been very different if there was a chain and someone dropped out or we couldn’t find a house we liked or anything fell through. A huge thing you might need to consider is whether your lender would give you a mortgage if you were already pregnant. Luckily, we had some paperwork sorted before we found out about the baby so managed to get our mortgage offer with no dependents or childcare costs considered. If your mortgage lender knew about your change in circumstance, they would take this into consideration and the amount you could borrow for the mortgage could be affected which could make or break your house purchase.

My advice would be to think about how much you want the house. If owning your own home is hugely important to you, focus on that first. I know it’s not what you want to hear but think of it as your first step in preparing for your little baby. If things don’t work out, you could get stuck in the annexe or pouring money away on rental costs. If you’d be okay with that, go ahead and TTC but if you really want the security of your own home first, there’s so much that could go wrong that I’d be tempted to focus on that. It doesn’t sound like you’re far away from making it happen so not long to wait until TTC anyway!

I know how you feel though and the urge to have a baby can be so strong. I’m sure things will work out how they are supposed to for you but it’s probably a good idea to take a step back and ask yourself what do you really, really want for yourself and your future children? Then maybe an answer will become clear.

I hope that’s helped somewhat, it’s a tough decision but only you and DP can make it. Good luck with everything, I really hope it works out for you! :)

Should also add look at your contract to see what mat pay you will qualify for. I hadn’t been in my job long enough so will get gov mat pay so have had to put aside savings every month since the BFP to pay for my mat leave. If you have to do this, you will have considerably less to put towards a deposit!

I moved house with a 3 month old baby. I viewed the house while I was in labour. It was absolute hell and I hate the house.

If you will have the money early next year, I would honestly wait until then to try and conceive. If you manage to conceive straight away you will may feel rushed and under pressure. If you don't conceive straight away you will have the stress of trying to conceive (yes it can be really stressful for some people) plus the stress of finding somewhere to live.

I know early next year probably feels like ages away, but it's really not. We are talking a matter of months. I would really consider the additionally stress of not waiting those few extra months

We brought our house and after many weeks til completion I was 38 weeks on moving day. It was horrendous!

We got lucky that we loved the house and our solcitors are family friends so things went quicker. I couldnt imagine how stressed i wouldve been if i was giving birth without knowing we had our home.

I know you're broody but there's really no need to hurry. Buy your house first, you have no idea how long it will take and being pregnant will have an effect on the mortgage you can get because of the affordability checks.

We had a surprise baby 4 years ago. We had about £11k in savings at the time I fell pregnant. We saved like mad through pregnancy and mat leave. Found a house after baby had been born just before I went to work. Moved house just before baby was a year old. It was an experience! Very stressful waiting on the estate agents, bank and solicitors. And then the actual move was horrendous with a baby.

We were able to really scale back and saved around 35k during that time as we stopped going on holidays and eating out/wine and booze. We went for days out instead and visited local sites and parks. So not all doom and gloom. Looked at what we were spending down to the penny and just adjusted life to meet our saving needs. I only had SMP while on leave so it can be done. Baby gear for everything brand new and mid to top range came in at spending around £1500 plus we had so.e big gifts from family which helped massively.

I dont think you're mad at all. Better to plan than be surprised. It can be done. We are happy and settled and may have found our forever house. (Which I know is just luck)

Look at your spending, have an idea of how much you need for a down payment and fees. Set some monthly targets. Look at your banks accounts, is your account working for you? Move money to higher interest saving accounts. Be realistic and have fun with it.

Congratulations to you and dp on your next step forward together x

One thing to bear in mind is if you are earning less or start paying nursery fees whilst trying to get a mortgage, this will lower the amount you can borrow. So it's isn't just about the deposit. I personally would wait until you find the right house for you and have moved, or at least for everything in place for it. It's also nice to have a bit of money to spend on the house when you first move in. Time is on tour side so I would wait it out.

We decided to buy a house whilst I was pregnant with my first, it was hell trying to fit work in with appointments to see the mortgage adviser, house viewings, bank meetings etc. We bought a house a week before my due date, exchanged the day I went into labour and moved the day he was born (our families did the moving obviously 😂). It was horrible, I nearly gave birth in my half empty flat that was full of people and dust from moving furniture, I didn't even have a bed or sofa to sit on! When I came home from the hospital I had to go to a new house where we had to sort out switching all the bills and new house shite! Wait and move first or after!!!!

Work out how mat pay, baby things, and nursery will affect your finances when factoring in a mortgage. It could be a huge hit financially and being pregnant could affect your mortgage outcome. Also factor in that you might not be able to work the full 9 months, it might not happen but consider that you could be off sick with any number of complications/illnesses.

I don't think ttc and saving is an issue, but what you need those savings for after a baby arrives may change. As long as you've considered everything and can cope with worst cases go for it.

We weren’t trying, but we fell pregnant whilst saving for our first house AND our wedding. I panicked so much about being in a house before baby is born (due Dec) but we got the keys to our house this month. It is HARD work!! We were saving practically all our wage every month and then had the surprise of our baby which meant even more to save. It has been so stressful I won’t lie, but it’s also made us a whole lot more sensible with our money and prioritising things.

We had the deposit but were still house hunting when I was pregnant. I was seven months pregnant before everything was finalised and we got the keys. It was quite stressful.

I don’t think you should let the stress of moving/baby affect you - those are normal life events and while stressful, you’ll cope!

The main thing to consider is applying for the mortgage - you won’t be able to borrow as much if you’re off work/have a dependent, so if this is an issue you may want to sort a house first.