Smoking. Enough.

[Courtney555]

Help me stop.

Those of you who smoked, what did you use to stop. Because I'm hating myself for doing it.

Context. 19 weeks pregnant. Stopped for the first 15 weeks because I was so ill I physically couldn't. I'm now not smoking all the time, but if I'm stressed, it's the only thing that helps me.

I'm probably having 2/3 days without, then something gets on top of me and I'll have like 4 in a row. Then 3 more later. And it's wracking me with guilt. I desperately don't want too.

What did you have instead of a cigarette? Please help.

I've never smoked a puff in my life but can't believe the tone of some of the posts on here. It's an addiction- great if you're the type who can manage cold turkey and has the willpower to stick to it, but not all of us are capable of that. OP doesn't need to educate herself, she knows that smoking is bad for the baby. That's precisely why she's here, asking strangers for help. There was a thread on this board a few months back where the OP who was at a similar stage in her pregnancy was battling a longstanding addiction to codeine and couldn't kick the habit completely. That poster got understanding and support. But because OP needs help getting off the smokes somehow it's appropriate to lecture her because someone's seen a video or leaflet at an antenatal class

OP I hope you've got some helpful advice but would second being honest with your midwife. They'll be able to advise you what steps to take, maybe refer you to your local stop smoking service. In the meantime (and until your book arrives) you could try the four D's when you feel the need for a smoke-
Delay acting on the urge.
Deep breaths.
Drink water.
Do something else.

Best of luck, really hope you find a solution that gets you over the line.

I. Can't. Stop. Despite doing everything I can in my control to stop

You stopped for fifteen weeks... you go 2/3 days without one.

Then you choose to smoke.

A genuinely alcohol dependent person would be severely ill and potentially hospitalised if they cold turkey stopped drinking, they’re at risk of seizures and all sorts. Please don’t compare the two. You’ve shown you can refrain from smoking. Pretending you simultaneously ‘can’t stop’ as if it’s out of your hands is a way of avoiding taking responsibility for what you’re doing to your baby.

There’s no magic solution that will stop you for you. It really is that simple. Trying to act like you ‘can’t stop’ will only make things worse for your baby as you’re suggesting the solution lies outside of you and if nothing seems to work, oh well, it’s out of your hands, might as well keep smoking.

With the greatest of respect, grow up. You’re not ready or fit to be a parent if you’re willing and capable of doing this to your baby when they’re so small and entirely dependent on you.

@TheCraicDealer

I've never smoked a puff in my life but can't believe the tone of some of the posts on here.

Quite agree. It's not me lacking in "education."

Thank you for understanding

Good luck OP. Simply cutting down is worthwhile. One day at a time.

Don't use a vape to quit entirely. I managed to quit using mine for my pregnancy but a few weeks after giving birth I was back on it and addicted all over again. IMO they're more addictive than cigs because you can use them anywhere if you're discreet. So you get into a habit of puffing continuously throughout the day rather than going out for a smoke x times.

Although if you're going to be smoking anyway you maybe should do a few weeks on an oil with nicotine (6mg) then switch to a nicotine free oil. Once you're on the nicotine free oil for a week or two I'd then just get your partner to hide it on you and resist buying anything in a shop. Hopefully by then your body wont be nicotine dependent and it will just be a habit to break.

Some people don’t understand how addictive it can be, especially if they were a smoker who wasn’t as addicted as you. I was the most addicted smoker I know.

A vaporiser with nicotine salts e liquid is the only thing that helped me quit - the nicotine is processed differently so the nicotine hit is closer to smoking that normal e liquid which did nothing for me at all. Of course smoking is worse than using a vaporiser - if you physically cannot stop, this is worth trying.

I have recently fallen off the wagon again (not pregnant) and trying to get back on. It’s absolutely awful. Of course I know I have to stop, but it’s not that straightforward. People don’t expect heroin addicts to be able to quit without proper support, and nicotine is known to be as addictive for some.

I'm sorry some people are being so unsupportive on here. It's not like you've said that you are preganant and are desperate to keep on smoking! Hypnotherapy worked for me, it was quite expensive, but I've saved that money many times over now. It doesn't work for everyone, so it's hard to say how you might react. You could have a look at 'Tapping' on YouTube as another way of overcoming cravings.

Sorry but no I'm not buying it I smoked atleast 20-30 a day. It was fucking hard going cold turkey. I'm not preaching you just need a fucking reality check. It's shit but it's a few months out your life why can't you do that for your child? Your just excusing your own shitty decisions. And as for your degree I have a very very relevant degree in this field! and I'm telling you it's terrible for the health of your child.

I'm not trying to be a c u nxt Tuesday saying this but how would you feel if anything happened to your baby? It would make you feel like you failed your child.

There is great stop smoking support out there get your midwife to check your CO levels it will show you how much your baby is getting. That might be an eye opener for you. Also smoking cessation team. But ultimately just don't do it. Like the same way you wouldn't put your hand in a fire because it endangers your health.

Personally (my opinion say what u wish) a baby would be enough for me to stop smoking. It is more than a good reason. Because it is ME damaging MY child for my selfish reasons, all for a few seconds of a "puff" and "relief" No chance

Christ. It is an addiction, worse for some than others. I gave up drinking a few years ago, with no trouble at all. That doesn’t mean I say that people who need extensive treatment to quit drinking are weaker than I am.

Some people cannot quit smoking without extensive support and unfortunately stop smoking services are being slashed across the country. They are usually very good in pregnancy though OP so I’d really recommend starting with your midwife.

The suggestion that she doesn’t care about her baby if she can’t quit is simplistic and ridiculous. She wants to quit. She obviously cares - there are plenty who don’t. This is an addiction, not using a sun bed or eating sushi FFS.

Have you had your doctors appointment yet @Courtney555 ? How are you getting on?
I was only vaping on low nicotine pre pregnancy but it's still been incredibly hard to stay off it! I have heard lots of people have success with hypnotherapy but the success depends on the type of person you are (some are more susceptible to hypnosis than others). Do you have any health cover through work? Like a cash back plan or something as some of them will reimburse you for hypnotherapy.

Some of the preachy responses here are awful! If only it was as easy to stop an addiction as 'just go cold turkey'.

Hi OP.

I 100% know what you are going through as I am currently facing this battle myself. I decided to bite the bullet and stop smoking last week. It's been almost 7 days without a single puff, and it is bloody hard, but this is the longest I have ever managed cold turkey. I just keep thinking about my wee baby. The first few days are the worst. I literally locked myself up in the house and didn't go anywhere where there would be people smoking. I bought a pack of polo mints, every time I had a craving I had a mint. Having a fresh taste in my mouth seems to counteract the craving of a nasty tasting cigarette.

Don't get me wrong, I am still getting cravings and it is still literally all I can think about, but I'm hoping I will soon forget all about it. There are a few stop smoking apps which I have found helpful as it tells you each day how much your health is improving by not smoking.

Good luck to you!