Pregnant and i have health anxiety

[LulaLuna]

Really needing support.
I stopped trying for a baby, as the stress and anxiety of trying and it not happening was too much! And then i started using the rythym method to prevent pregnancy and i became pregnany immediataly!
I am in the first few weeks, early days.
I have a problem and i need help, i spoke to my gp and im waiting for antenatal services so i can inform them too... Basically i have intrusive thoughts about the baby being ill or something wrong, it has happened even when i was first trying to get pregnant. The thoughts makw my heart feel panicky, and i have problems relaxing and falling back to sleep if i wake up early.
I dont want to worry my partner, so i have not shared much. At first i was scared i ate something that may of contained a bacteria, so i went to the doctor and she reassured me the likliehood is baby and i will be fine, the risk is so small. Now i just have a feeling of fear about the baby and i want to know the baby is healthy, so much.

I dont have much support, my partner is as good as he can be, and very sweet, but other than him i just have my old nan who is 86, and a couple trustworthy friends.
I dont want to burden anyone but i need help seeing a more balanced view, i want to enjoy my pregnancy not be scared the whole time.
Help

Did you talk to your go about your anxiety in general or just about a specific worry? It's normal to worry about a pregnancy, especially if you have experience of problems in pregnancy. However if you feel the worry itself is getting out of hand or if you have a pre-existing problem which is made worse by pregnancy you really need to see your doctor for help with that issue rather than with specific worries. I have had to seek help with my anxiety before I was pregnant and it did help.
If the nhs is a bit slow there are charities who can help with cheap or free counselling. Also the nhs website has a section on mental health and pregnancy.
I really hope you can get some help & try not to google too many things as it's very triggering xxx

Thank you, yes it was a specific worry. I will take your advise and let them know that it is more generalised. I am going to practice mindfullness and gratitude to help keep me alright. I will speak to gp and antenatal about this soon so they are aware. Thank you xxx and yes googling stuff is scary it really is not helpful

@LulaLuna- bless your heart, can completely relate to how you feel.
I’m 24 weeks pregnant and a first time Mum. I suffer from general anxiety anyway so being pregnant has certainly had its challenges.
I know this image is portrayed of women being happy and glowing during pregnancy but the reality is it’s bloody hard. It’s a scary and nerve wracking experience at times- especially the first time. I don’t know what’s “normal” what’s not... I’m getting to the stage of monitoring kicks which I know will fill me with even more anxiety!!!!

Just some things I have learnt along the way. DON’T GOOGLE ANYTHING!!!!!!!! You will never get a definitive answer to anything.. I’ve spent hours worrying over what Dr Google has told me only to be told by an actual Dr that it’s nonsense!

If you’re feeling anxious try not to worry about it, I know that’s easier said than done but you’re just layering the anxiety and you will feel worse. The anxiety will go if you let it flow through your thoughts rather than fight it.

Lastly. You CAN get through this, it’s been a far from easy journey for me but I’m getting through day by day... some days with anxiety some days without. If you ever want to chat I’m always happen to listen xx

Hi Kate, thank you for this. i take it on board, about the googling its not helpful so im not going to do it anymore, and i will try to let the thoughts go and stay calm. Its really helpful knowing this anxiety is a thing that alot of women can experience in pregnancy. I hope you are well it sounds like you have your head on straight and a good self awareness. Respect to you and many thanks for reaching out, i appreciate it so much right now xx

If anxiety is a real struggle, I would kindly advise trying to get some support & coping strategies in place as soon as you can.

I don’t suffer from anxiety as a condition but boy did I find aspects of pregnancy worrying & then having a tiny human solely dependant on you is a whole new kettle of fish. As my worries were relatively fleeting and easily resolved by a chat to other mum friends or my other half, I could see how they could become all consuming if you already have pre-existing issues with anxiety.

Reach out to your GP to see if there is any support you can access or I guess hunt around online for guidance etc. And don’t be afraid to tell your partner, goodness, I cry and rant to mine about all sorts if I need to let it out. That’s partly what they are there for right, unconditional love & support

Ps. I agree, don’t google illness!

Thank you so much xxxx

Self refer to your local iapt for CBT (make sure you tell them you’re pregnant) and in the meantime start working through this workbook:

www.cci.health.wa.gov.au/Resources/Looking-After-Yourself/Health-Anxiety

I went through this too but I had such a healthy baby. It’s hard and as soon as you are reassured about one issue another will crop up 😫 when you have your first scan hopefully you’ll feel better

I havr downloaded the
Worksheet on health anxiety thank you

And FoxandtheBear, that is sooo good to hear ❤ ahhhhh xx

Second the comment about self referring to IAPT if this is possible where you live.
www.nhs.uk/Service-Search/Psychological%20therapies%20(IAPT)/LocationSearch/10008
If not, see if your local area has something similar. I suffered from intrusive thoughts about awful things and thought my brain was permanently broken, but after 12 sessions of CBT (cognitive behavioral therapy) and doing my “homework” religiously I am a different person. Good luck!!

Hi Guys so i have self reffered to the mental health and started reading through the guide, which i need to find time to work through. I am struggling and it is frustrating as i feel this sense of doom, like pessimism, and its confusing me i dont know what to believe. I just want to know my baby is healthy, and i cant go on feeling this for another 9 months or so, im only 6 weeks. Sorry to be a debbie downer, need support and some reassurance xx

Pregnancy is terrifying isn’t it! I was the same for the first three or four months, I’m 24 weeks now. I would oscillate between ‘omg so happy’ and ‘my baby has died and my stupid fucking body just hasn’t realised, when will the bleeding start?’ made even worse by a bleed at eleven weeks where I felt like my worst fears had come true (they hadn’t, everything was fine).

It’s such a horrible process cos you want it so badly but have no guarantee it’ll be okay at the end, I tortured myself with miscarriage stats.

It went away about four months in once I started to feel that even if it went wrong now, at least we’d made it this far and I’d had time with him and felt like no matter what the ending I would always feel like a mum.

It helped me to be rather fatalistic and remember that the outcome was gonna happen however much I worried, and if the worst happened I’d be distraught but I’d survive. People do. People lose their living children and survive. My partner tried to get me to stay calm and positive so the baby felt secure and calm haha. That kinda worked too. Just repeating ‘today I am pregnant’. Ultimately nobody can reassure you it’ll be okay cos nobody knows. It probably will be, there’s a chance it might not be. It’s a long slog and pregnancy has been the longest process of my life and those early weeks were hell on Earth mentally but time will progress whether you’re happy or miserable and this time next year you’ll know how the pregnancy went and no amount of worrying or stressing will change that. Hope CBT helps you to see that seeking reassurance things will be okay is futile and learn to live with the uncertainty cos that’s the only way forward.