Terrified of MMC

[Inthemidstofitall]

Hi all. I'm 31, first baby and currently 7+2. Basically, like a lot of you I'm sure, I'm terrified of MC and MMC.
I actually only learned about MMC when reading the conception boards on MN and now I can't get it out of my head.
I had my booking appointment with the midwife yesterday and spoke to her about my anxiety around it. She basically said that if a pregnancy is supposed to continue, it will. And if it isn't, it won't, and it's already decided and there's no point worrying.'
Which seemed to be good, if not a bit blunt, advice.
Do I just need to pull my big girl pants up and relax?
Anyway, my symptoms are as fierce as ever and I know that I have to take that as a positive.
Hurry up 12 week scan!!
If anyone is feeling the same and wants to chat, or any wise women with some pearls of wisdom for me on getting through the next 5 weeks; I'd love to hear from you.

Wishing us all healthy and happy pregnancies.

Feel the same as you but as it's second baby there not rushing booking appointments so feel quite alone. first pregnancy was so easy, this one seems more painful and it's partners first so putting a brave face on it

Hi @messymummy2 congratulations on your pregnancy, how far along are you?
It's hard to not feel alone during these early weeks when not many people know and there's not many people to talk to about it.
It must be extra difficult having to keep your symptoms under control when looking after another child too. How old is your other child?
My DP has 3 children from his first marriage, they stay with us a couple of nights a week. I get on with them well and we're really looking forward to telling them they're going to have a younger sibling. It's been tricky hiding my symptoms from them mind! That's another thing that the 12 week cam will bring relief from.
This week I've found myself feeling 'aware' of the fact that DP has already done all of the things that I'm experiencing for the first time, with someone else.. but I know it's hormones because I knew this before we discussed having our own.
I'm sure these little things are the start of many highs and lows that the next 7 months will bring.

I completely understand how your feeling. I have 2 teenagers but when I was pregnant with them I did not read half the stuff I currently am and am now petrified that might have had a missed miscarriage.

I am currently 8+6 and last week we were considering going for an early scan this eve but we are going away Monday and I said if there’s anything wrong I won’t be able to go so will let kids down so we decided against it. I’m 36 now too so I’m afraid age is against me although I am in good health and there seems to be lots of women in their late 30s/40s having healthy babies.

I haven’t contacted a midwife yet. I will call GPs next week and ask to speak to a midwife so that will be when I am 10weeks. I feel so nervous right now but with every week that passes I do feel more positive too.

@alphabetti the internet is both a treasure and a curse. I've fallen into many a 'MMC hole' and struggled to get out. Suddenly my cuppa's gone cold and I'm sitting in the dark without the lamp on 🤣 but I do know about empty yolk sacs and fetal poles 😔 what a nightmare when it's supposed to be such a happy time!
I'd do the same about giving the early scan a miss. You want to go on holiday with a positive head. You're pregnant and there's nothing telling you otherwise. Go and enjoy it!

Hi my ds is nearly 8 and I'm 6+4 but as I know that will change thanks for replying

I’m currently 9+1 after 2 MCs this year (before 6/7 weeks) and have been terrified of MMC also. DF and I decided that a private scan would help so held until yesterday and it was so worth the money. I’m a different person today without all the anxiety! Cried last night with relief as I finally allowed myself to imagine that we could actually have a baby at the end of this. If you can afford it I’d recommend doing it to settle yourself. I’ve attached mine so you can see what it could look like at 9 weeks xx

@Keyboard91 WOW! That is absolutely amazing. I'm so so tempted to go for an early scan!

Hi op, i was scared of this too with dc1. We are ttc baby 2 at the moment and know I'll feel same again.
Last time I had to have a scan at 7 weeks due to bleeding, and everything was OK, thank goodness! I felt better for seeing the baby on screen. I did some reading as like you I was still very anxious and I did read some where that once the heart beat is seen the chance of mc drops even further... So that made me feel much better! Although was still nervous going for my twelve week scan!
What I'm trying to say is, get an early scan if you feel it will help reassure you! Congratations on your pregnancy!

Thank you @Nicecupofcoco that seems to be the advice from most 'worriers' like myself.
I think I might just book one for next week you know. I'll be 8 weeks, so I should be able to hear a heartbeat.
Really happy for you that all was fine with your first, and lots of baby dust for you for conceiving number 2!

@Inthemidstofitall thank you! Yes you certainly will be able to see the heart beat at 8 weeks! Plus then you will only have four weeks to wait until the twelve week scan and that will fly by!
It's an anxious yet exciting time! Hopefully you'll be able to relax alittle more after your scan! Come back afterwards and tell us all about it!

Hey all. Just wanted to say I've been absolutely terrified for the last week. I'm 29 and pregnant with my first. My symptoms seemed to go away on Tuesday (apart from my big sore boobs) and I just had the very definite feeling that I wasn't pregnant anymore... there was quite a bit of crying.

But I had a scan this morning and all is fine. Measuring 7+3 and there is a heartbeat. So going to try to learn from this. I think I had a lot of ideas about what pregnancy would be like (eg my mum always talks about her HG and I have only had a tiny bit of nausea so far) so got scared when it wasn't how I thought it would be. Going to try to keep the faith and keep strong for my 12 week scan. Would love some help haha. Xx

Aww how awful. It's terrible isn't it. So stressful. I've been exactly the same. I'm 40 so a little riskier but it is what it is. I had a complete mc in Feb so when I found out I was pregnant again (very early on) I was a wreck! Constantly expecting the worst. Refused to accept it possibly. I had to book an early scan. I think I'd have put myself into some kind of screwed up mess otherwise. Knowing my danger times I booked it for as close to 8 weeks as possible. All was ok and it took an absolute weight off. I can't recommend it enough. And the private clinic people are so lovely too. I've never heard anyone say they've been for a private scan and been treat badly. If you need anyone to chat to feel free to inbox me. Good luck and please try to be positive. I know that's very difficult! I'm sure everything will be just fine. Hugs 💜💜

The midwife's advice is absolutely correct. All anyone can do is hope for the best in early pregnancy, most people will go on to have healthy pregnancies.

I personally think that everyone should be offered a 7-8 week scan (they are in some countries). Seeing a heartbeat is very good news!