Deciding on mat leave - help?!

[Andersonx3]

Hi all, I have a meeting this afternoon at work for a performance review and have decided now's a good time to discuss maternity leave. Im 22+5 currently and due 30/11.

A bit of background - I have an issue with my spine which causes unbearable pain 24/7, pregnancy has not helped! Work are very accommodating about this though and my pregnancy is consultant led because of this so I have support.

First pregnancy & first baby so new to all of this!

What have you ladies done and what advice do you have?

I'm due on 27th Oct and my maternity leave officially starts on that date. I'm taking 2 weeks leave first so my last day in work is 11th October.

@Andersonx3, what advice are you looking for? How long to take? When to stop work? I am 28 weeks, I'm taking 9 months mat leave with my husband taking the last 3 months as shared parental leave (as I earn more than him, it makes more sense for us to live on my salary rather than his). I am due on 24 October and finishing work on 13 September so using a mixture of annual leave and starting mat leave one week early.

I started Mat leave a month before my due date to have time to get everything ready and chill out. It can depend on your finances, though, as statutory mat pay is crap and finishes after 9 months.

Is it even safe for you to work right up to your due date?

Re advice, it depends on a number of factors I suppose. How long do you intend to take in total? Do you want to maximise your time with the baby after birth or are you happy to use some of the time before the birth, especially if you're pain is going to get worse as the pregnancy progresses? Financially are you in a position to be able to take the full 12 months (thereby potentially maximising the time you get to spend with baby after the birth but also may be finishing a little earlier). The earliest you can finish, I believe, is 11 weeks before your due date.

Personally I will be moving over to the Isle of Man where my partner lives so intend to finish around six weeks before my due date (31 January) which will coincide nicely with Christmas. If I was having the baby where I live now, and not having to move to another country, then I would probably work as long as I could as I have an office-based job and no complications (as yet, fingers crossed!).

I think yours is going to be possibly very dependent on your spinal condition and how the pregnancy continues to affect that.

Thanks everyone - advice I'm after is when to begin mat leave. I've already decided I won't be taking the full 12 months as I only work part time anyway and my work are happy for me to return early and work from home when it suits etc.

I accrue my holidays so I'll have to enquire what I'd be looking at coming up to my leave to see what I could take then.

I'm going to play it as if everything were normal until anything changes regarding my back as it's so unpredictable!

I have stopped work at 37+3 and that's for a pregnancy with no complications so far. I had thought about working up to due date but I'm so glad to be off. I have a lazy morning, go for a walk, nap in the afternoon, take time making dinner, early night....bliss. I'm enjoying the last days of spending time by myself!

@Andersonx3 I'm using three weeks saved holiday and finishing work on 8th November. Hopefully for my ML to start when baby actually arrives.

My due date is the same as you!

I'm due the 17 October and finishing exactly a month before so my last day in the office is the 16 September. I probably would've worked longer but live in a country where you have to go off a month before. I'm quite happy to have that time to myself and get everything ready. As other posters have said, very much depends on how you feel. Don't underestimate that pregnancy can be really hard on your body especially if you have a previous condition so take it easy on yourself :)

Different things feel right for different people. I liked being at home for a bit before the baby arrived.

Given that your job is part-time and flexible, I wouldn’t be too desperate to stay at home as long as possible (but I would be desperate if me going back to work meant full-time childcare for the baby).

I stopped work two and a half weeks before my due date, but DC was over a week late so I ended up being off for nearly a month. I really enjoyed my time off but it didn't really need to be so long!

I'm due on the 2nd December, so just after you, and I'm finishing on the 15th November.

I stopped work roughly 4 weeks before I was due and used my holidays for that year (even ones I technically hadn't accrued yet) and intended mat leave to start the day DS was born. He ended up being induced 2 weeks early so I was subsequently paid at the year end for the holidays I hadn't managed to slot in before he came as they wouldn't let me carry them over.

I think you should play it by ear and see how you are. Remember if you're off work with a pregnancy related issue a certain time before you're due (I think it might be 4 weeks) then your employer can start your mat leave at that point.

Thanks everyone, I think I'll say mat leave 2 weeks before due date and then pop any annual leave in front of that! That way if my back has given up by then I'll have extra time to relax!

Watching with interest, I'm due the 27th of November, considering starting mat leave on the 11th of November but I'm not sure if I'm being selfish taking time off to myself. I've suffered with PGP since 10 weeks so also not sure if I'll still make it into the office all the way to the end.

@smartcarnotsosmartdriver it is not selfish at all! You will be tired by that point and you need some time to recharge before the hard work really begins!

I worked up to a week before my due date with my first. Low key office job. Baby came the next day and I felt a little rushed and overwhelmed. Didn't have enough time to get all the last minute stuff ready for the baby or just even put my feet up for a day. With my second I wanted some time to relax and enjoy my pregnancy so I finished a month before my due date. It felt a little self-indulgent and I was a little bored by the end but I do highly recommend taking some time to yourself before the baby comes.

I’m finishing work at 37 weeks (end of September) but my mat leave will officially start at 39 weeks as I’ve two weeks annual leave to use before the end of our holiday year. I’m already on a daily countdown 😂

I'm due 21st of November and I'm going to wind up on the 1st. I am finding work a major challenge already especially with commuting and I don't want to be absolutely exhausted going into the birth.

I agree it can be hard thinking about taking time for yourself when you want to spend the maximum with the baby but on the other hand, being on the best possible form when the baby arrives is important too.