Partner who refuses to take his phone out running

[Ridethewaves]

Last night I got in from work to find my partner had gone out for a run. Unfortunately shortly after I started bleeding quite heavily, a shock as im 25 weeks along. I tried calling/ whatsapping him but couldn't get through so ended up calling a friend to take me to the hospital. 3 hours later, still no sign of my partner at the hospital and no answer on his phone. It turned out he had also not taken his house keys so couldnt get back into the house to get to his phone.
Eventually he called me from a friends house after waiting for me in the garden for 2 hours!
Luckily the baby is fine so we're both very relieved and back home. But this evening he's gone out running again and point blank refused to take his keys and phone (apparently theyre annoying to carry!).

Am I being unreasonable to be annoyed about this?!? Any suggestions as to how I get him to see that being contactable is important?

Could he get a smartwatch/fitness band that text messages come up on? Handy for tracking fitness/heart rate as well. Then you could at least contact him to say COME HOME if necessary!
Also get a keysafe and get a spare door key cut, really handy for emergencies as well as running.

I never take my phone when I go running. It's awkward to carry & if anything happened, I'd have to run home before I could do anything. However, I rarely run furtherttthan 8k so am never that far away. I'd never go without a key though.

I think going out without a phone is fine, but going out without a door key is bonkers.

My husband was marathon training when I was heavily pregnant and still managed to take his mobile with him - he had an arm band that it strapped into. He uses the phone to time his runs and play music so it has a use as well as ensuring he can be contacted. He knows full well that if it rings to turn back towards the house and start sprinting!

I'm afraid I'm with your DH on this one. Unless he is training for an ultramarathon and is gone for several hours at a time. He's gone for what? 45 mins? Even at full term you are able to be out of contact for 45 mins. Like pp said, is he allowed to swim, nap, shower, gym and go to meetings at work? All situations where you can't check your phone for 30-60 minutes.

The whole event that happened with him not being at the hospital happened because he didn't have his keys, not because he didn't have his phone. And forgetting them is annoying but it was an accident which all of us make from time to time.

I know this has been mentioned but the flip belts for running are really good. You hardly notice you're wearing them unlike the cumbersome arm band things. I got mine off amazon and am a convert.

You're not asking for him to not go out at all! He needs to compromise and carry the key and phone. I'd be massively pissed off if my dh just flat out refused.

My husband runs for an hour or more every day with neither nor door key. Just the dog. Always has since before we married.
You had a scare so may be overreacting but you really don’t need immediate contact most of the time. You’re only 25 weeks, so can he not swim or play tennis? What about flying or motorway driving?

Even once the baby's born he can't just fuck off whenever he feels like it for hours on end. The baby could be sick/ screaming/ or whatever and in a 50/50 relationship you should be able to call on him if you need to.

Comments like this are just exaggerated and ridiculous. He goes for a run during his DPs early-mid pregnancy = he's going to be a lazy father, come on.

I had an awful fall when out running once in some woodland. I actually almost smashed my phone as I fell but luckily had put a screen guard on it a few days before so that was just cracked and not the actual screen. I was able to phone my mum as I couldn't weight bear. Turned out I had badly broken my ankle and required surgery! Lucky I had my phone on me or I may have had to wait for hours lying in the mud waiting for a random dog walker to rescue me!

It is ridiculous to go out running without a phone in this day and age. Same as going on a long car journey without a phone. Why wouldn't you?

But when you other half is at home pregnant? Unforgivable!

Hmmm get him to take his key at least. How long does he go out for?

Unless he is marathon training, I doubt he’s out that long. Me and dh run and we have phones or 4g watches so we can be contacted.

To be honest, I’d want him to have something for his own safety more than anything.

I just read this to my DH (mid thirties DR) and his response was...’what an utter moron! Feel so sorry for women who come in in labour or having serious problems and no one can reach their DP for love or money!! Sometimes it’s a decent reson but 9/10 it’s just the guy being an irrisponsible asshole like that one!’

^ show that to your DH if he makes out it’s just ‘women over reacting online’

Hmm tbh i think it was just bad luck he was out and hdnt taken keys.
I think a key hidden somewhere would suffice since if he had had the key, he'd have got in to see his phone.

My husband can't take his mobile to work and could be in a lab so can't always be connectable. People who work offshore..you can send emails but you have to rely on them to pick them up and any contact is them calling home not vice versa. So I don't think it's a big deal really

You can get armbands and belts as mentioned for running, surely it wouldn't be a big deal to bung his phone and keys in there?

1300 but OP's asked him to take keys/ phone and he won't. It's her first pregnancy, she's worried and asking him to do a minor thing for her while she's feeling vulnerable. It's not too much to ask is it? And if it is, he very well may not step up, a man who looks after himself isn't likely to just change the moment a child comes into the world.

I'd buy him one of www.amazon.co.uk/Flipbelt-Classic-Premium-Running-Medium/dp/B00JF9DWWU/ref=asc_df_B00JF9DWWU/?hvlocphy=1006598&linkCode=df0&hvptwo&psc=1these&hvnetw=g&hvadid=214275304074&hvpone&hvlocint&hvpos=1o1&hvdev=m&hvdvcmdl&hvqmt&tag=mumsnetforu03-21&hvtargid=pla-314726938528&hvrand=3491650690595370670. Best running belt imo.

What a tosser!

I don't agree he needs his phone when you are only 25 weeks, but he should have his key, or at least hide one in the garden.

He's being a dick

He needs to carry a key, and either a ntactless cad or some cash in case of ccident injury when at a distance from home. It would be sensible to carry a phone (I always do, in case something happens and I need to call for help) especially if there is particular need to be contactable. And the last weeks of pregnancy probably count for that, so he may as well get used to it now.

But how long does he actually run for? If it's usually

If he calls or has an accident he would be grateful for a phone and if he gets locked out in the pissing rain I guess he would be happy he has a key.

The keysafe is a good idea, or simply hiding the key somewhere he can access it (although this is less safe). If he refuses to take his phone at least it won't be locked in the house for hours that way, since he will be able to retrieve a key.

I get that 25 weeks may be early to be ensuring he is contactable, but last night proves it is still necessary.

My DP never takes a phone out running, neither do I. I've tried a band to hold it and it just bothers me.

I think you've had an unfortunate experience but I wouldn't be expecting my partner to be contactable at all times at 25 weeks.