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Original poster

C Section or natural birth?

39 replies

DinosaursWouldEatYou · 03/07/2019 11:06

I had DD1 via C Section due to her being breech- nothing dramatic, found out about 5 weeks before due date and after 2 attempts at moving her the hospital arranged a C Section.

Now I'm pregnant with DD2 due middle of August and have been given the option of either.

At my 2nd scan they found I had a low placenta and if it hasn't moved by 34 weeks I'll have a C Section again- but it's like 1/100 pregnancies where the placenta hasn't moved in time so I'm confident it'll be gone. On the same day as 3rd scan I have an appointment with the consultant to put pen to paper as to whether I'm having natural or section.

I want a section for so many reasons but I'm getting pressured by so many people that I should have natural and now feeling really conflicted. During my 1st pregnancy I wasn't fussed, I was kinda in the mind set of labours gonna happen when it happens and there's no point terrifying myself with the thought of pain and such. Then when they said about booking a C Section, again I wasn't fussed cause it wasn't like my baby was in immediate danger and such.

But this time around I'm scared of the pain, I'm scared of how long it can take to give birth, just all of it. But I feel like I'm gonna let so many people down and people are making me sound selfish for wanting a 2nd Section.

If I gave birth naturally the first time I wouldn't care this time around but being giving the option of either, I'm working myself up and just want advice and previous experiences from fellow moms...

OP posts:
Teachermaths · 03/07/2019 11:14

I'm the opposite to you. Had an EMCS last time and will do anything to avoid a CS this time. The recovery was soo bad, I couldn't walk for a few days, got an infection and finally healed after 5 months. I'll take a long labour over that!

You might end up with one anyway if you go over because they don't like to induce due to risks to the scar.

MsPavlichenko · 03/07/2019 11:26

I had an elective section after an emergency and was happy with that as were staff. Was a million years ago mind.

Remember it is vaginal birth or not. It isn't " unnatural" to have a section. Good luck!

username4567 · 03/07/2019 11:26

It's nothing to do with anybody else it's your body no one else's. You do what feels best for you.

babysnowman · 03/07/2019 11:29

If you want a section then have one...you won't be letting anybody down and anyone making you feel selfish is in the wrong.

Pipandmum · 03/07/2019 11:30

Selfish for having a section? What? My husband’s ex did actually say to me when I told her I’d had a section ‘oh not a real birth then’ - felt pretty damn real to me!
Do what you want. When the ducks told me I might be able to have a VBAC I didn’t want to - as it happened the baby grew too big and I had another section. It’s not the easy way. Do what the doctors recommend and tell everyone else it’s none of their business.

Bear2014 · 03/07/2019 11:32

My first was transverse so had a CS, and I chose an ELCS for my second in preference to a natural birth. You need to decide what is best for you, it's none of anyone else's business and they shouldn't be trying to influence you.

I'm glad I made my decision because:
Date was planned in advance to arrange childcare for DD
I knew how it was going to be and roughly how I would navigate recovery so less anxiety
DS ended up being enormous and would have probably been an EMCS anyway.

Hope this helps! Good luck.

funkycoldmedina19 · 03/07/2019 11:33

I'm pregnant with my second now and told the midwives from my first appointment that I wanted a c section. First dc was a section due to low lying placenta, she was breach and stopped putting on weight towards the end.

Funnily enough I'd always said that I bet I end up having a section, even before I was pregnant. After having a c section, the chances of needing one for subsequent births rises. Not 100% sure on figures but have a feeling it's near the 50% mark, happy to be told I'm wrong though.

It's your body and no one else's decision. As for letting people down, I'd tell whoever it is where to go. Your body, your baby. As long as dc gets here safely, that's all that matters. The cliche of 'happy mum, happy baby' seems appropriate here.

RedPandaFluff · 03/07/2019 12:01

Hi @DinosaursWouldEatYou - I started a thread on this subject as this is my first pregnancy (although I'm getting on a bit 😁) and for some reason every instinct I have is telling me to ask for a planned c-section, so I wanted some opinions/experiences. Having read all the responses, I'm 95% that a Caesarian is the way to go.

I tried to link my thread, but I can't seem to do it - sorry! Have a look in AIBU - it's called ". . . to ask for a Caesarian?"

Zoobunny · 03/07/2019 12:03

It isn't "unnatural" to have a section
I think unnatural was the wrong term to have used here; it’s clearly unnatural but that doesn’t make it wrong or less significant or make the OP a coward/failure.

Zoobunny · 03/07/2019 12:04

But anyway OP, go with what you want and do what’s best for you!

Blossom28 · 03/07/2019 12:11

Same situation as you, I also felt a bit pressured and was terrified of labour! But it was an incredible experience. Hands down the most incredible thing I’ve ever done. I had an epidural when the pain got too bad, and it was amazing.. do what you feel is right, but don’t be scared!
For me, the natural birth was less scary, and less painful in the long term than the c section. And my birth wasn’t the most straightforward.

Blossom28 · 03/07/2019 12:13

I’d also add that the midwife stayed with me for my entire labour, didn’t leave the room once due to it being a little more risky. Due to this, I never worried because I knew that I was being cared for.

SweetMelodies · 03/07/2019 12:18

Your body, your choice. Do not let pressure and other people’s preferences get in the way of something so personal.

You’ve had a previous ELCS so you know what to expect in terms of the procedure and the recovery. If you opt VBAC you may well end up with a wonderful straightforward experience and overall easier/better time than choosing a section. Or you could end up with intervention anyway- instrumental/episiotomy/bad tearing are all things to consider, as well as the possibility of ending up with emergency c-section anyway. It’s all about which risks you are willing to take and what is most important to you.

Kentishgal · 03/07/2019 12:26

OP I had an emcs the first time (baby got stuck and womb ruptured) so I'm booked to have a elcs with my second next week (once you've had womb rupture you need to have planned sections in future). But I absolutely hate this guilt tripping and putting people down who have had c sections - it's not a competition. Seriously, so long as you and baby are safe then that is all that matters. Do whatever is right for you, why should it matter to anyone else.

meow1989 · 03/07/2019 12:30

Personally, having had a very painful labour ending in emcs which I had a very easy recovery from, if I have another I will opt for an elective section... the idea of vaginal birth seems terrifying though and I cant believe I was expecting to do it!

Grandmi · 03/07/2019 12:38

Do not be influenced by other peoples opinions/judgemental comments. Do what is better for you and the main priority is to have a safe delivery and healthy baby.

Original poster
DinosaursWouldEatYou · 03/07/2019 12:43

Thank you all for your support! It really has made me feel better and my gut is telling me to go with C Section!

It's just shocking that people are so bold and open giving there opinion when they find out some people have had sections.

Thanks again guys!

OP posts:
Drum2018 · 03/07/2019 12:44

I agree, your body, your choice. Who are these people pressuring you? Chances are you'll need a section anyway given the placenta issue. Once you have had a section they won't take any risks by letting you have a vaginal birth if everything is not straightforward. If you have someone at home with you for the first 10 days/couple of weeks you should be fine.

Mummylanie3 · 03/07/2019 12:44

It's totally down to you what you decide it's your body and everyone is different I had a emergency c section with my ds1 which was horrible they cut his face when they cut into my stomach and my wound got infected so I stayed in for 9 weeks my ds1 and ds2 I have a vbac as I was adamant I'd never have a section again everyone has different experiences and if my c section had been ok I would have probably opted for another. My vbac both had complications so they both come with pros and cons but you need to do what's best for you xx

Bambamber · 03/07/2019 12:47

Who is trying to pressure you into a vaginal delivery? It's not selfish to want a c section, it's your body so it's your choice.

Instagran · 03/07/2019 12:52

If your gut reaction is to go for a c-section then do that. Don't let anyone make you feel guilty for not having a VBAC.

I'm not sure that my experience is helpful as we are all different but for what it's worth I had an EMCS after an induced labour and then a failed ventouse with DC1. Recovery was easy and I was walking everywhere and driving in less than two weeks.

DC2 was a VBAC with forceps. He was premature and labour was extremely fast so the whole VBAC/section decision was taken out of my hands. It took me months to recover from his birth and it was far more difficult than recovering from the EMCS. My childbearing days are over but if I was having another baby today I would choose a section without question.

SweetMelodies · 03/07/2019 12:52

Hospitals also have their own agenda for pressuring women to have VBAC’s for their own statistics/targets, they are notorious for providing unbalanced information to women to sway this as well.

TreesoftheField · 03/07/2019 12:52

Do your research and go with what is best for you and your circumstances.
Having had EMCS first time round, my thoughts were
-my hospital stats suggested I only had a 50% chance of successful VBAC and that could include forceps
-my mum was coming up to look after toddler and having a set date was easier as we have no one near us if I went into labour
-i recovered brilliantly from first cs and wanted to avoid some of the difficulties friends had had with forceps etc
-my first child ended up in NICU for 3 weeks and I wanted to take baby home straight away this time

All very personal to me. I had ELCS and it was bloody amazing and the right choice.
Nobody tried to make me feel bad about it but they'd have got short bloody shift if they did.
If you really feel passionately about VBAC, try it, I know some people who've done it and loved it. Equally I know someone who ended up having another EMCS, this time under GA due to urgency. It's a total lottery which outcome you'll get and I didn't want to take a chance

Original poster
DinosaursWouldEatYou · 03/07/2019 13:32

My family, partners family, half my work friends and sitting down with my midwife today she was very encouraging for a vaginal birth.

And whilst I totally get they probably don't realise they're pressuring or they're just having a joke, all those people with there comments on top of each othet has really hit me today.

OP posts:
SRK16 · 03/07/2019 13:37

I’m having a sort of similar issue. I have a health issue and have previously been advised to have a c-section or face probable life long consequences (but not life endangering to me or baby). I’ve been really struggling as feel I ‘should’ try to have a vaginal delivery as it might be okay, but on balance feel much safer/better about a c-section. I think I will go with a c-section as think the likely risks outweigh the benefits of a vaginal birth.. but other people’s comments sometimes really make me doubt myself.

Try and take other people out of it and think about what you’d say to a friend/loved one ( as well as considering risk/benefit of both options). That’s what’s helped me so far.