BFP after miscarriage scared

[Katy34]

Hi ladies, I had a mc on the 21st of may this year and just found out yesterday that I'm pregnant again, was huge surprise considering I had not had a period yet since mc and don't even know when I ovulated!! I know we dtd on the week of the 9th this month, had some brown blood the last few days so thought my period might be coming on but nothing has changed still spotting, only took test because my bf thought I was and now he all smug lol cause he was right!! But to be quite honest I just can't seem to get excited quite the opposite I'm scared shitless ( excuse my french) especially with having the spotting. Would very much appreciate some advice from anyone else who has been or is in the same situation

@Katy34 I had 3 MCs last year and am now just over 7 weeks pregnant. Unfortunately, pregnancy after an MC is a much more anxious experience. I had spotting with this pregnancy - told GP and given my history I was referred for HCG testing and a scan and all looked ok - turns out it was implantation bleeding - which I never had with any of my previous pregnancies. My only previous experience of very light spotting sadly turned out to be MC no. 3. How far along are you? It sounds like very early days so the spotting may well be IB - I have my fingers crossed that it is. Had you had a negative test before you started TTC again? Just to ensure you haven't still got high HCG levels from previous MC. If you have concerns then contact your gp and mention the spotting.

@Newbie21 we got a negative test result on the 6th, and was advised as long as the bleeding had completely stopped and I felt emotionally and physically ready we could ttc when I felt ready, really hoping it is IB we did plan on waiting until after I had a normal period before we ttc again but our friends wedding got us a bit tipsy 😆🤣😜 and here we are, so not really sure how far along as don't even know when I ovulated! I know what week we dtd but that's about it! I'm sorry to hear about your mc's how do find they have affected you? If you don't mind me asking?

@Newbie21 after my mc I felt empty like I didn't have a reason to get up or do anything, I found it difficult to speak to many people except my bf, I constantly felt like it was my fault, and that I must have done something to cause the mc, if it hadn't been for my bf , bff and Mumsnet I don't think I would have coped, but here we are again with a bfp and I still can't believe it, so nervous, going to phone gp in a few mins when surgery opens to see if I can get an appointment

I had a mc last November, then (due to smear test recall after lletz) I waited 2 months, to sort that, then fell pregnant again.

I was extremely anxious at the start of this pregnancy (now 26 weeks), everyday I woke up and felt like it would be the day I mc again. Constant knicker checking, and reading into everything!

day by day it has got easier, I had an ohs scan at 8 weeks, private scan at 11 weeks, nhs scan at 13weeks, then another private scan at 16weeks. OTT maybe but it made me feel better.

From 6 week I felt like shit with terrible morning sickness, nausea etc, you may also find that when that kicks in you feel better.

The baby has been kicking since about 19 weeks, so again, that has helped - but I'm still very anxious, far more then in my first pregancy.

You extremely fertile after mc, so not surprised youre pregnant at all! Will keep my fingers crossed for you, its easier to think after mc that youre body has failed you when often its your body doing the right thing as such - there are so many reasons a pregancy can fail, and it really is so common.

I've tried to be really open about my mc, even when it has made others awkward, the amazing thing is the amount of people who then say I also had a mc.

Good luck xxx

@Katy34 I can understand the way you felt. I'm lucky that I have a DS - nearly 3 years old - with him I got pregnant straight away so didn't anticipate issues with no. 2 but after the first MC I was devastated but my DS kept me going - I had to - so to not have him would have hugely compounded the grief. I blamed myself - I'm 38 - was 37 then and thought I'd waited too long (although I married just before conceiving DS and my hubby is younger so not much I could change) but I knew it was down to my eggs being more hit and miss with age. I became a bit more insular - ok speaking to DH, immediate family but have pulled back from my friends a bit. I don't want to go out for drinks in case I get a bit down and don't want to talk about it with people but it's all that really occupies my mind. I've found Mumsnet helpful - there is a thread - pregnancy after loss - they call it the penguin huddle. The ladies on there really get it and I've found that thread particularly helpful. Now at 7 weeks I've joined a thread for "graduates of the pregnancy loss thread" so a lot of the ladies I'm familiar with and we all compare notes and try to calm each other when anxiety gets the better of us.

The biggest change for me is how I approach pregnancy - I'm now more fearful of scans - worrying for bad news and preparing myself for it whereas with DS I was so excited. I worry about every twinge and fear seeing blood when I go to the loo so generally more on edge. I'm hoping once I get to the 12 week mark I'll settle a bit.

I also dread the anniversaries - the due dates and the date of the MCs but I'm coming to terms with it.

@Katy34 definitely mention the spotting to your gp/midwife. They may have you HCG tests which will give some level of reassurance.

Hi OP. I was in the exact same situation last year, 3rd miscarriage in 6 months, then fell immediately pregnant without a period or even a clue really. Bloody terrifying, frankly, and I'm afraid the nerves didn't dissipate until towards the end.

I'd sidestep the GP and ring the EPu if I were you. Mine were excellent in the event, but they said they'd like to scan and check HCG as they wanted to be 100% it was a new pregnancy (I knew it was as I'd had negatives very quickly after the m/c) and not retained products. They also said they'd need to date it because the m/c might've thrown dates out.

As it was, I conceived only a week after the m/c, so the scan meant I was properly dated, as we would have thought I was a few weeks behind otherwise. Happily, the result of all this is currently a dribbling 7 month old snoring in my lap, so everything crossed this is your time.

@Newbie21 @sianyb83 @LimpLettice thank you so much for sharing your experiences it's comforting to know I'm not alone, think I'm going to contact my epu as have now started spotting pink/brown blood and my nerves are through the roof xx

@Katy34 fingers crossed for you. Definitely contact EPAU. I hope it's not a very early MC and I know it's no consolation but your body may be just adjusting after the previous MC. I hope that is not what is happening and I know of ladies who unfortunately experience quite a bit of spotting which is very stressful but they still go on to have healthy babies. Fingers crossed x

I had a Missed miscarriage a few years ago. Got pregnant again 6 weeks after that and my DS in now a very happy 3 year old. But I did not enjoy that pregnancy, I was constantly anxious. I had some early spotting and went for an early scan. (This was offered on the nhs where we live due to previous miscarriage) so if you're worried contact your GP or EPU. I'm sure they'll be able to put your mind at rest.
Generally speaking - brown blood is old blood so less worrying. Red blood suggests fresh so docs would be more concerned. Obv not in all cases so best to get checked. It could be spotting from implantation.
Good luck

@Newbie21 @CoffeeAndCakeEssentials sadly bleeding has got heavier and is now bright red, and my local epu not got any spaces available for scan and nearest one is 45 miles away and I do not drive so just going to have to wait until tomorrow and see what they say! Holding very little hope now 😥😭😢

@Katy34 I'm so sorry the bleeding has got heavier. Sad though it is, the scan will just give an answer as opposed to help in anyway. Also going by your dates you may be too early for a scan to show anything. If this is an MC then it will not have an impact in the future on your ability to conceive. It may be your body is still adjusting and needs a bit more time. It doesn't make it any easier. Maybe leave it a few days (if you are not being seen) and then take a pregnancy test to check - although it could still show as pregnant if HCG is still high. Maybe give it a week. The waiting is horrible so ensure you have support around you. I'm not sure whether you are able to pay for private HCG testing or a scan? If waiting is too much. Fingers crossed for you.

@Newbie21 @CoffeeAndCakeEssentials @Bubblebubble123 @SquigglyOne well still bleeding 😥, was at the doctor this morning and she was about as compassionate and caring as rabid dog, got me to take pregnancy test, (which came back as positive) but then sent me home and told me she would phone the early pregnancy unit for advice and get back to me by 12 o'clock today( my appointment with her was at 09:20am) she still had not back in touch with me by 1:30pm so I phoned the surgery only to be told she was out of the surgery on calls, and she had not phoned the epu yet or left a message for me, she eventually phoned me back at 2:30 pm only to tell me that she has arranged an appointment for a scan/tests on Friday at 10:30 so now I'm still left in limbo not knowing for sure if this is a mc or not and stressed to the hilt which if I'm not having a mc is not good for baby!! So frustrated and angry with doctor and nhs

@Katy34 that is super annoying but try to remain as calm as possible. Think of the positive that you are getting a scan on Friday and you will have answers then. I have my fingers crossed for you

@Newbie21 trying very hard to keep calm, my bf being a rock for me at the moment, will keep you guys up to date on what happens, keeping everything crossed 🤞

@Newbie21 @CoffeeAndCakeEssentials confirmed this morning that I have had another miscarriage 😥😢 spoke about possible further testing to find out what could be causing them as this my second mc in a two months

@Katy34 I'm so sorry that it is another MC. It's such an awful thing and nothing can be said to make you feel any better. I'm glad you have a plan to have tests and checks. We started the very same process and I fell pregnant just as we were about to start Clomid. I actually think being proactive and checking can make you feel better in that you are doing as much as you can do and it can help you relax - not for everyone but I found, after 3 MCs when I started feeling hopeless that having checks and appointments made me feel like I had a plan which I really needed. Take your time and I hope you are getting all the support you need. 💐

@Newbie21 yeah knowing that they going to run tests to find out the cause has relaxed me a bit, thankfully I have a great support network, between my partner and friends ( some of whom have had mc so know what I'm going through)

Hi ladies, how are you all doing? Not been on here for quite a while, I'm currently 4 days late but bfn doctors telling me to wait a week to test again, as absolutely no signs of af, fingers crossed 🤞