Pregnancy - LOVE it or HATE it?

[xELENx]

You hear so many stories from people about how they 'loved' being pregnant and missed it when their baby was born. On the other hand, there are those who hated it, for various reasons.

What is/was your experience of pregnancy?

I hated it. Couldn't eat and drink what I wanted, often felt sick and tired and couldn't do any proper sports.

I'm on the fence!
Love - no symptoms, creating new life.
Hate - constant anxiety.

It's a magical thing and all that, and I'm so so grateful everyday that I was, but absolutely hated it all. Too much anxiety, stress and worry, I tend to worry anyway, so being pregnant just made me feel 10 times worse.
The sickness, gagging, aches, pains and tiredness I found so tough, plus felt my mental health took a big battering, so no I didn't enjoy.

Why do you ask?

I had a lot of reasons to hate it, and found that for the sake of my own mental health I needed to find some things I liked about it as well. I would have spiralled into utter despair otherwise.

Loved it - obviously the sickness and bone-curling tiredness in the first trimester were a pain, but the energy levels in the rest were awesome and the feeling of creating something was amazing.

Love that I’m having a baby, really feel so lucky and blessed BUT anxiety and worrying is through the roof. I miss not being able to use my usual outlets to let off steam like high intensity exercise, even having a Kalms tablet!!!! I am craving one lol!!!! X

Thanks for your input ladies, I really appreciate it!

@53rdWay I'm only asking out of curiosity as DH and I are currently TTC our first child. I suffer from bouts of anxiety (panic attacks) from time to time so the possible elevated anxiety is a bit of concern for me but not enough to put me off. Although it has taken a while for me to come to that decision.

Honestly ? It's a complete miracle and the end result was marvelous but ... I hated every minute of being pregnant from the constant nausea to the sleeplessness and the horrendous heartburn (I would chug mylanta/antacid liquid from the bottle) to the swollen ankles and vicious hemorrhoids to the stubborn weight gain (despite daily swimming and walking and eating healthy)

The only thing I loved was when the baby moved and I could feel it - and my partner could too - that was lovely

Love it but hate all the worries that come with it x

@xELENx- I also suffer from anxiety and I’ll admit it has been hard but there’s lots of support out there. I’ve also discovered that anxiety in pregnancy is SO COMMON! I know that doesn’t necessarily make it any easier but it’s reassuring to know you’re not alone. I do find myself at times wishing the weeks/months away, but I’ve made it to just over 15 weeks after an early loss last year so hopefully things will continue to go well x

I still have quite a way to go. I'm 17 weeks and can't wait to meet our little one but I hate it.
I was diagnosed with PGP at 10 weeks and I'm now walking on crutches, my employer are doing nothing to help me. I'm so concerned as I need to keep my earnings up, so we can live and so I can qualify for maternity pay and our sick pay is terrible.

I'm 17 weeks and all lovely seeing my stomach turn in to a bump and feeling little twinges, but my sciatica is playing up, my back hurts and I miss pate on toast and a rare steak!!

I'm probably 70/40, 70 loving it, 40 hating it. Loving it because I thankfully have few symptoms, and it's amazing to feel the baby kick, and know that my partner and I who I love so much have created this little human! Hating the fact that it comes with lots of restrictions food-wise (I miss sashimi so much!), that it's made me a slight insomniac (because of having to go to the loo various times and general worries) and I used to sleep so well (!!) and also the feeling heavier part, so feeling "less" like myself. But on the whole, I am super grateful and enjoying the second trimester.

Always loved it once the sickness stage passes (that knocks me for 6 each time!!)

Dc 1,2&3 loved it, despite having sod & cholestasis with dc1!
Currently on dc4 and pretty much hate it! Anxiety is sky high (honestly don’t remember having it with the others 🤷🏼‍♀️ Despite being an extremely anxious person) feels like there’s so many complications this time when one gets resolved another pops up, and too many unknowns! It definitely doesn’t feel like a ‘walk in the park’ this time!
Even the movements with this one get me down - I have no pattern whatsoever, either get movements ALL the time or nothing! And the movements this time friggin hurt - MW even mentioned internal bruising last week because I’m so tender to touch (and I have a high pain threshold!) just feel like i can’t win! 33 weeks tomorrow and still waiting for the ‘glowing’ stage! And everything is basically a countdown which drags! Currently counting down until growth/placenta scan next week!

*SPD

The way I am currently feeling I am not enjoying pregnancy, I struggled when I was pregnant with my son also.
I guess it depends what symptoms you get and how you cope with them, I know people who have had multiple pregnancies without so much as a sniff of feeling “off”

I hated it, mainly as it freaked me out seeing my body change. Looking back at photos though it was the best I ever looked! Shame I didn't realise or appreciate that at the time!

@kate3150 sorry to hear about your earlier loss, that must be very difficult and would naturally make you more anxious about this pregnancy. Wishing you health and happiness for the remainder of your pregnancy!

@smarrtcarnotsosmartdriver what a predicament re work, I feel for you. Sounds like it's going to be a rough few months but it will all be worth it when your wee one arrives

Seems like mental health is a factor for most when pregnant so not all happy, happy, joy, joy as folk on Facebook would you have believe (which I knew anyway really). Can I ask, when you say that you are worrying/anxious, what are your main concerns? Is it the viability of the pregnancy, the health of your baby, your own health, how you'll manage when baby arrives?

As selfish as it sounds (baring in mind that I am not yet pregnant), my main concern is for myself. Will I cope mentally, will I become physically ill with something 'unfixable', might I die, etc. Sounds extreme, I know, but I can't help but worry about these thing as my anxiety is very much health related. FYI - I have no health issues at present.

However, I am 34 (35 in October) and have PCOS so I'm a little concerned how these factors may impact a pregnancy. I know there is loads of info out there (I've read a lot of it) but as every pregnancy/woman is different, it's the not knowing that I hate.

Anyway, I'm rambling now! Thanks again to all of you for your replies, you have been really helpful x

I'm only 16 weeks so far (first baby) and definitely not loving it yet....!!!!!!

I hate it, I feel so anxious and generally rubbish the whole time. I’m only 7 weeks now so a long way to go but can’t wait to never have to do this again!

@xELENx- my main probably has been worrying about the effect anxiety will have on baby. Which makes me feel worse as usually I just ride the anxiety out but a secondary worry of how baby is doing comes into play and that escalates it (hope that makes sense?).
With regards to birth, I couldn’t give a damn what happens. It doesn’t worry me at all. Neither does life with a baby as I cannot wait! I am so ready for a baby.
I had a couple of ops last year for severe endometriosis last year, the second of which turned out to be major surgery so anything medical doesn’t really bother me. Just my bloody anxiety being a pain in the arse 😂. And very interesting to see it’s the main theme on your thread in relation to whether women love or hate pregnancy.
Ps... I also have mild PCOS but it’s never caused me any problems xx

I'm on the fence too!
I've had four DS's and the first two I was young (19/22) so quite naive about it all.
The second two, I struggled. Mainly with anxiety that something bad would happen to me or the baby.

I've had straightforward pregnancies and lovely births but anxiety really held me back sadly.

Hated it-Sickness with both......ocd anxiety out of this world-cbt counselling at the time to try and help. In answer to you're question it was fear of the unknown-was the baby developing ok??? Had i done anything to harm my babies, would i be lucky enough to go full term. The responsibility felt huge that i was creating this life. I only relaxed a little when that gorgeous little bundle was placed on my chest-a feeling like no other!!! Did it twice so although the fear was huge was not enough to stop me doing it again.

Bloody hell ladies, the fear is real!!

@kate3150, like you, I'm not afraid of being a parent, I want children. However, I want DH to give birth to them! Lol. The thought of having no control over my body for 9 months freaks me out and don't even get me started about the birth. I've already decided on an elective c section. I know it's not the easy option by any means but my anxiety would shoot through the roof if I went into labour naturally. The knowledge that I'll know exactly when the baby will be delivered and that I won't feel a thing (at the time) is the only thing making me feel like it's remotely possible for me to have kids x